post 910: the first thursday thirteen ...

"The very first time
That I saw your brown eyes?
Your lips said hello,
And I said hi.

I knew right then?
You were the one.

But I was caught up
In physical attraction --
But to my satisfaction?
Baby, you were more than just a phase.

And if I ever
(Ever fall)
In love again?

I will be sure that?
The lady is?
A friend!

And if I ever
(Ever fall)
In love so true?

I will be sure?
That the lady's just?
Like you! ..."

-- "If I Ever Fall in Love" by Shai.

--------------------

Thursday, May 31, 2018.

The Thursday Thirteen, Edition Uno!

(Note: I intend to do this every Thursday going forward, usually as a list, if only to serve as a placeholder to note "hey, I'm still here, my liver hasn't pulled a Larry Hagman on me yet!" ... and because believe it or not, this site is less than two months away from turning ten.  Ten!  It's almost old enough to drink, toke, hook-up, and then make the walk of shame (or pride) the morning after!

(Or at least graduate first grade.  Either way, I'm so (not) proud of my little failure that never will!)

--------------------

Today's Thursday Thirteen?

The Thirteen Best R&B Songs from the 1990s, according to Stevo.

--------------------

(Note: I'm 41, white, single, straight, and grew up in a family well-enough off, that both my parents retired before they turned sixty, and that was twelve years ago.  Let's just say, I am not the genre of today's list's target market.  Also, let's just say I whizzed away the advantages my genes and God above gave me, for a solid five, six ... hell, fifteen years, of my life ...)

--------------------

Today's (h/t) list was inspired by my buddy Marques, who listens to this epic stuff next to me all day long.  I gotta admit, half the time?  I just mute my iPhone and listen to what's coming off of his.  (Pause).  What?  (Pause).  Yeah, I'd cede Mixology for a tailgate to him!  Why do you ask?

(Also, I swear, if my high school buddy Bunch worked at "current employer", he'd never leave his desk.  Hell, I'm pushing 25 years out of high school, and I don't leave my desk listening to this stuff ...)

--------------------

13. "Baby I'm Yours" by Shai.  They still have another one coming in this list.  (The theme to the post is the "Official Honorable Mention" ... at least until there is another honorable mention a few choices from now.)

(Also, I swear, I used to be semi-cool, kids.  I swear to God, I used to be semi-cool ...)

12. "Knockin' Da Boots" by H-Town.  In the words of the great Joel Meyers: "aah sh*t ..."

11. "Changes" by 2Pac.  Yeah, technically it's rap, but come on.  Any song that gives you the classic line "I made a G today! / But you did it in a sleazy way!" has to be included.  It just has to.

10. "Hit Me Off" by New Edition.  God bless, other than the very first CD I ever bought (an entry off of it is coming up shortly), no CD shaped mid-90s Stevo than the New Edition reunion effort in 1996.  Plus, good God, the talent New Edition sported!  Crazy sick.

(Honorable Mention: "Mr. Telephone Man" by New Edition.  Technically released too early to qualify for this list ... but damn, it's smooth.)

9. "I Don't Wanna Cry" by Mariah Carey.  I'm enough of a man to admit that I played the f*ck out of this song for most of September and October 2004, for strictly personal reasons.

8. "Forever My Lady" by Jodeci.  Full disclosure: "Diary of a Mad Band" is a really, really, really good CD.  I get that their "Unplugged" appearance put them on the map, so to speak ... but I firmly believe "Mad Band" would have done it eventually.

It's also one hell of a fun hook-up soundtrack.  And I mean, one HELL of a fun hook-up soundtrack.  (Pause).  Just sayin'.

7. "My Destiny" by Lionel Richie.  True story: "Back To Front" was the first CD I ever owned.  (Damn, 1993 was a long ass time ago.)  And for quite a while, this song would have ranked as my favorite song of all time.  (As it is, it's still in my top 100 somewhere.)

My way of saying ... it's nowhere close to his best effort * ... but hey, when you're 17, 18 years old, moving 500 miles away to go to school, and need some motivation to believe in yourself?  You can do a lot worse than pulling up this track as you study in the library at 11:30 on a Tuesday night.  Again -- (Pause).  Just sayin'.

(*: greatest.  love.  song.  ever.  Unless you prefer this one.  Or this one.)

6. "How Deep Is Your Love" by Portrait.  I swear to Christ, I thought Take 6 released this ... but per iTunes, it's Portrait.

In the interest of full disclosure, for the possible five or six of you who drunk or stone stumbled onto this site ... welcome!  We share a love for drunken, stoned living!  (Well, in your case, "love", in my case, "addition".  Whatever.)

Having said that, my favorite movie of all time is "Saturday Night Fever", and few -- if any -- songs hit me as righteously as this one does ** .

Which is why the fact a remake of the love theme from that movie finding a warm spot in my heart ... stuns the hell out of me.  This version might be better than the Bee Gees.  (Pause).  Fine -- it is better.

(**: even if said scene is not only the worst scene in motion picture history, ** it completely undoes the entire production of cinema perfection that preceded it so epically, "How I Met Your Mother" is embarrassed for "Fever"'s finale!  And I say that as someone who actually liked the "HIMYM" finale.)

(***: also, I couldn't find the entire final six minutes in English on YouTube!  Probably for the best.)

5. "Humpin' Around" by Bobby Brown.  Like this needs any explanation.

4. "No Diggity" by Blackstreet.  "Play on, playa.  Play on, playa.  (Pause).  Yo Dre -- drop the verse!"

Honestly ... from this point on, I could flip any of these three ... but for me, they're definitely the top three.  In this order.

3. "Anytime" by Brian McKnight.  If 1998 "bts" hasn't creamed his shorts by this point of the post, I've failed epically.  Because 1998 Stevo is struggling to control a bodily function about five spots ago.

Also, this song would still skyrocket to the top of the charts if released today.  It's that damned good.

2. "The Place Where You Belong" by Shai.  Let's just say, Stevo loved him some Shai back in the day.  And I mean LOVED him some Shai, back in the day.

But Numero Uno ... come on.  There's no doubt.  (Pause).  At least for me.  Because as I've argued before, it's the most grousely, criminitely underrated song in modern American music history ...

1. "Can We Talk" by Tevin Campbell.  This might be the perfect music video, and I'm not just saying that for the sake of typing.  "I'm Ready" is so freaking great of a CD.  So, so freaking great ...

--------------------

And with that, thanks for reading.  As noted up top, I'll try to do this every Thursday going forward.  I will probably fail, and probably by late June at the latest ... but I'll at least try ...

Until next time?  Let's be careful out there ...