Monday, September 21, 2020

half assed nfl season predictions

Alright, let's finally get these posted.

Most years, this is a drawn out, 8-10 post piece with some reason, rhyme, and rhythm to it.  This year, it isn't.  I'm just gonna post the schedule runs, then post my, uuh, postseason picks, and then we'll move on, because let's face it, these bad boys are three weeks overdue, and with the way life is working for me right now, if I wait any longer, these may never go up.

Also, as much proof as I can offer, that this schedule run was done before the season began, and has remained unchanged since:


Here we go.

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NFC East.


* Projected Champion: Philadelphia Eagles.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: Dallas Cowboys.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions: 

3. Philadelphia Eagles.
9. Dallas Cowboys.
28. New York Giants.
32. Washington Redskins.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

8. Doug Pederson, Eagles.
18. Mike McCarthy, Cowboys.
19. "Riverboat" Ron Rivera, Redskins.
31. Joe Judge "Judy", Giants.

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NFC Norris.


* Projected Champion: Green Bay Packers.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: none.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions: 

10. Green Bay Packers.
17. Minnesota Vikings.
23. Chicago Bears.
26. Detroit Lions.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

11. Matt LaFleur, Packers.
14. Mike Zimmer, Vikings.
16. Matt Nagy, Bears.
26. Matt Patricia, Lions.

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NFC South.


* Projected Champion: Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: none.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
14. New Orleans Saints.
20. Atlanta "Shane" Falcons.
29. Carolina Panthers.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

10. Sean Payton, New Orleans Saints.
17. Bruce Arians, Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
22. Dan Quinn, Atlanta "Shane" Falcons.
30. Matt Rhule, Carolina Panthers.

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NFC West.


* Projected Champion: Seattle Seahawks.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: San Francisco 49ers, Los Angeles Rams.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

6. San Francisco 49ers.
11. Los Angeles Rams.
12. Seattle Seahawks.
19. Arizona "Super" Cardinals.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

5. Pete Carroll, Seattle Seahawks.
13. Sean McVay, Los Angeles Rams.
15. Kyle Shanahan, San Francisco 49ers.
23. Kliff Kingsbury, Arizona "Super" Cardinals.

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NFC Postseason.

Playoff Seeding:

* 1. 11-5 NFC East Champion Philadelphia Eagles (tiebreaker over Tampa Bay Buccaneers via Conference Record).

* 2. 11-5 NFC South Champion Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

* 3. 10-6 NFC West Champion Seattle Seahawks (tiebreaker over San Francisco 49ers and Los Angeles Rams via Conference Record).

* 4. 9-7 NFC Norris Champion Green Bay Packers (tiebreaker over Chicago Bears via Conference Record).

* 5. 10-6 San Francisco 49ers (tiebreaker over Los Angeles Rams via Strength of Victory).

* 6. 10-6 Los Angeles Rams.

* 7. 9-7 Dallas Cowboys (tiebreaker over New Orleans Saints via Record Amongst Common Opponents, tiebreaker over Chicago Bears via Conference Record).

Non Playoff Teams:

* 9-7 New Orleans Saints.
* 9-7 Chicago Bears.
* 8-8 Minnesota Vikings.
* 8-8 Detroit Lions.
* 8-8 Arizona "Super" Cardinals.
* 4-12 Washington Redskins.
* 4-12 Carolina Panthers.
* 4-12 Atlanta "Shane" Falcons.
* 3-13 New York Giants.

The Games:

* 6 Rams 31, at 3 Seahawks 14 (Sat 1/9, 3:30pm CT, FOX).
* 7 Cowboys 38, at 2 Buccaneers 31 (Sat 1/9, 7pm CT, ESPN / ABC).
* 5 49ers 30, at 4 Packers 20 (Sun 1/10, 7pm CT, NBC).

* 7 Cowboys 31, at 1 Eagles 21 (Sat 1/16, 7pm CT, FOX).
* 6 Rams 34, at 5 49ers 27 (Sun 1/17, 3:30pm CT, FOX).

* 7 Cowboys 21, at 6 Rams 34 (Sunday 1/24, 2pm CT, FOX).

NFC Champion: 6 Los Angeles Rams.

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AFC East.


* Projected Champion: New England Patriots.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: none.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

8. New England Patriots.
15. Buffalo Bills.
22. New York Jets.
24. Miami Dolphins.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

2. Bill Belichick, New England Patriots.
7. Sean McDermott, Buffalo Bills.
20. Brian Flores, Miami Dolphins.
29. Adam Gase, New York Jets.

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AFC Norris.


* Projected Champion: Pittsburgh Steelers.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: Baltimore Ravens, Cleveland Browns.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

2. Baltimore Ravens.
7. Pittsburgh Steelers.
27. Cleveland Browns.
30. Cincinnati Bengals.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

4. John Harbaugh, Baltimore Ravens.
6. Omar Epps Mike Tomlin, Pittsburgh Steelers.
27. Zac Taylor, Cincinnati Bengals.
32. Kevin Stefanski, Cleveland Browns.

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AFC South.


* Projected Champion: Houston Texans.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: Tennessee Titans.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

5. Tennessee Titans.
13. Houston Texans.
21. Indianapolis Colts.
31. Jacksonville Jaguars.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

3. Bill O'Brien, Houston Texans.
9. Mike Vrabel, Tennessee Titans.
12. Frank Reich, Indianapolis Colts.
28. Doug Marrone, Jacksonville Jaguars.

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AFC West.


* Projected Champion: Kansas City Chiefs.

* Other Projected Playoff Teams: none.

* Preseason Teams Power Ranking Positions:

1. Kansas City Chiefs.
16. las vegas raiders.
18. those people.
25. Los Angeles "Super" Chargers.

* Coaches Power Ranking Positions:

1. "Fat" Andy Reid, Kansas City Chiefs.
21. jon gruden, las vegas raiders.
24. Anthony Lynn, Los Angeles "Super" Chargers.
25. vic fangio, those people.

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AFC Postseason.

Playoff Seeding:

* 1. 11-5 AFC West Champion Kansas City Chiefs.

* 2. 10-6 AFC Norris Champion Pittsburgh Steelers (tiebreaker over Baltimore Ravens via Record Amongst Common Opponents).

* 3. 9-7 AFC South Champion Houston Texans (tiebreaker over Tennessee Titans via Divisional Record, tiebreaker over New England Patriots via H2H Victory Week 11).

* 4. 9-7 AFC East Champion New England Patriots.

* 5. 10-6 Baltimore Ravens.

* 6. 9-7 Tennessee Titans (tiebreaker over Cleveland Browns and those people via 2-0 H2H record).

* 7. 9-7 Cleveland Browns (tiebreaker over those people via Conference Record).

Non Playoff Teams:

* 9-7 those people.
* 8-8 Buffalo Bills.
* 8-8 New York Jets.
* 8-8 Cincinnati Bengals.
* 8-8 Indianapolis Colts.
* 8-8 las vegas raiders.
* 7-9 Miami Dolphins.
* 4-12 Los Angeles "Super" Chargers.
* 2-14 Jacksonville Jaguars.

The Games:

* 6 Titans 20, at 3 Texans (Sat 1/9, noon CT, NBC).
* 7 Browns 6, at 2 Steelers 31 (Sun 1/10, noon CT, CBS).
* 5 Ravens 17, at 4 Patriots 20 (Sun 1/10, 3:30pm CT, ESPN / ABC).

* 3 Texans 24, at 2 Steelers 20 (Sat 1/16, 3:30pm CT, CBS).
* 4 Patriots 17, at 1 Chiefs 38 (Sun 1/17, noon CT, NBC).

* 3 Texans 24, at 1 Chiefs 41 (Sunday 1/24, 5:40pm CT, CBS).

AFC Champion: 1 Kansas City Chiefs.

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Super Bowl LV.

* 6 Los Angeles Rams 20, 1 Kansas City Chiefs 45.

Super Bowl Champion: Kansas City Chiefs.

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