Saturday, July 26, 2008

classic: end to the 2006 regular season

sk: enjoy.

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The good news: We're in! We're in! Season still on!
The bad news: I get to recap another game! No, wait, that's actually a good thing. So really, there is no bad news to report ...

So I got home Sunday with about 9 minutes remaining in the 3rd quarter of the 49ers game. I fire up the TV, and this is the first thing I hear:

(moose johnston) It was real interesting. When we talked with mike shanahan this week, he said he wanted Kansas City to win, to keep the pressure on his own team.
(curt menafee) He definitely didn't want his team to back into the playoffs.

We all know that I have a (brett voice) "vivid imagination". But not even I could have written a script as beautiful as this.

The Chiefs win, at home, in the snow, behind a power rushing attack, the most un-freaking-believable blocked punt / touchdown I have ever seen, and three absolutely brilliant, awe-inspiring play calls by the worst offensive coordinator in franchise history. (Actually, four, but one I credit to Herm. As always, more below ...)

The Patriots, in a game that meant absolutely nothing to them, roll into Nashville, drop a 40 spot on the Titans, and even run up the score by having 92 year old Vinny Testaverde throw a touchdown for the 20th consecutive year.

The Steelers, in a game that meant absolutely nothing to them, go into Cincinnati, fumble away a sure touchdown, allow a 47 yard pass completion with less than a minute left to set up what should have been a gimme field goal for the Bengals ... and then drop a 67 yard bomb of their own on the Bengals to start overtime, and keep hope alive for Arrowhead Nation.

My prayer entering the day, was that the denver game would actually matter for us. Wish granted. But thankfully, God didn't stop there when giving Steve his 30th birthday present.

Because the 6-9 49ers, who had beaten exactly one team with a winning record all season (the Seahawks), who had already lost by 41 (at KC), 29 (vs SD), 31 (at Chi), and 24 (vs NO), who had been swept by the mighty Arizona Cardinals, and who had nothing at all to play for other than "we're here, so what the hell, let's take the field". The 49ers spot my most hated franchise in sports a 13 point lead via a back breaking pick six right before halftime.

And then score 20 unanswered points, and tack on two more field goals, the latter set up by a brilliant QB block on Pro Bowl safety john "Iate hit" lynch, to win at denver, and complete arguably the most amazing four team parlay in NFL history.

You wanted KC to win, mike? You got it.

Chiefs 35, Jaguars 30.

You didn't want to back into the playoffs, mike? You got it.

denver's next opponent: TBD, week 1, 2007 regular season.

Chiefs next opponent: at Colts, 3:30pm Saturday, 2006 playoffs!!!

The only "backing into" anything that'll occur for your broncos this week, mike, involves a dead cornerback, a coffin, and a hole in the ground. Have fun with that.

Holy sh*t. Somehow, someway, we're alive! Season still freaking on! Without question, the single greatest NFL Sunday of my lifetime. I truly don't know where to begin. But I know what I'll be doing come 3:30 on Saturday afternoon ... and happily, its the same thing mike shanarat and his collection of bullet-riddled donkeys will be doing: watching the postseason on television!

* I was so confident of our chances of making the playoffs, that I drove on Sunday, because, and I actually said this on Sunday morning, "I want to lose this game". (Long story, but its a stupid Steve superstition). I'd given up. I wanted to tank the game for draft positioning, I was so sure denver would win. The lesson, as always: if I am THAT confident about something, its not going to happen.

* When I went to the grocery store to get chips and backup bloody mary mix at about 6:45am, the temp deal in the car said 54 degrees. On the drive home after the game, it said 28. Its always a bad sign, when the warmest it gets, is when you first wake up. Then again, I'm that guy who thinks that if the first thought that enters your head rolling out of bed in the morning is "whoa, its kinda cool in here, let me grab a shirt", its too cold. So what the hell do I know.

* If they showed some dude in a Chiefs rugby jersey fist pumping and screaming "J E T S Jets Jets Jets!" about 100 times on Sunday, well that was me every time they showed the Jets score.

* Seriously, for me, it doesn't get much better than this. My favorite team somehow, someway gets into the playoffs. My second favorite team is in, and plays less than 24 hours after my favorite team. And the game in between the Chiefs and the Jets, involves the only NFC team I give a crap about. Good God, I might be in rehab by Monday. Especially if all three of them win ...

* the video tributes to Lamar were neat. But Tony DiParto playing "Taps" was really emotional. Not quite as tear-inducing as when they play it before the Indy 500 every year, but still, awesome stuff.

* Sign Number One it was going to be our day: No KC Wolf Sketch!

* Weird Introductions Moment: "The Chiefs Tight End!" Tony Gonzalez was the only TE in the group.

* 61 home games and counting since I got to cheer our head coach during introductions. For those keeping track at home, that dates to the denver game in 2000. I think next year, I might just put a sign on the back of the Blazer that says "(Dan Roberts voice) and the Chiefs head coach!!!", so that way at least I can let everyone know what I think of the man. Even if his "I know we're on the opponents side of the field, and its a makeable 4th down, but screw it, let's punt" mentality really irritates me.

* The first huge moment: the Bernard Pollard punt block. I have rewatched that at least 10 times already, and its still one of the most amazing plays I've ever seen. The crowd reaction, it didn't really come through on the TV how loud it got. That place was going crazy after that play.

* Gutsy moment of the day number one: LJ's first touchdown. 4th and inches. 10-7 Jaguars. I would have kicked. Herm never hesitated to go for it. That's why he makes the big bucks, and why I pay them to watch him do his job.

* Brilliant play call of the day number one: the flea flicker. Other than my roommate, nobody loves the flea flicker more than me. That was just beautiful to watch unfold, especially since it happened in my end zone. LJ into the hole, the defense collapses the pocket ... and he flips the ball back to Green, who took a vicious shot while delivering a perfect throw to a well covered Kennison at the back of the end zone. For all you Huard backers, and I'm not one of you, don't worry, brilliant call of the day number two is coming up.

* The halftime show. I have to be careful here, because y'all know what I think of Ida McBeth. I think she's just beyond amazing. I lobby every game for her to be one of 2 permanent singers of the National Anthem (along with Rev. Hal Weeks). Her voice is just incredible. So they introduce her, and immediately, I'm happy, I'm like "sweet! This is why I didn't go pee yet, to see her!" And then they announce she's going to sing "Amazing Grace" in tribute to Lamar. And I'm like "double sweet! Great choice!" Only ... it just didn't work. The "interpretive dance", or whatever the hell they call those things, just didn't do it for me.

* Brilliant play call of the day number two: Green goes down, helped off the field. Enter Damon Huard. First play was a handoff to LJ. Then, magic. Solari calls a drop back pass, bomb down the sideline to Kennison. Kennison hauls it in on an amazing one-handed grab, 40 yard reception, Chiefs have 1st and goal to go.

Here's why I loved it. First, at that point, up 21-10, that's Solari and Herm going for the jugular. That's a play you call when you want to kick an opponent in the nuts and end the fight. Brilliant stuff in its own right. But why I really loved it, and I really don't mean this to come across as a total rip on "former head coach", but that's how its going to sound, is because it never would have happened under "former head coach".

There is no freaking way "former head coach" would have let Al Saunders call that play. Because it would have made Green look bad, it would have given the fans a reason to back the backup QB and boo when Green came back (which is, in fact, what happened, sadly). "Former head coach" would never have let any play be called that would make his chosen one look like anything less than the shining star. Herm? Doesn't give a sh*t, if its a good play and you think it will work, call it. I'll deal with the fallout later.

I still think he has to go when this season is over. But for a couple moments on Sunday, he actually looked competent. Which is more than he can say at pretty much any point in the last four weeks.

* Funniest broadcast moment: Chiefs up 28-17, Jags squib kick the kickoff. Nobody on the Chiefs tries to cover it, the Jags are rushing towards it, and Len Dawson drops the "Jesus Christ, cover (the football) already!" blast. I love commentators who speak exactly what I'm thinking. Even if it might draw a fine from the FCC.

* Brilliant play call of the day numero tres: Chiefs did recover the squib kick. Move down the field. And now face a 3rd and 9 at the Jaguars 11. They break huddle, and line up 3 wide, plus Gonzalez, with LJ as the lone setback. Obvious pass upcoming. Only ... its not. Its a pitch left to LJ, with Shields and Waters in front of him (one of them pulled, not sure which off the top of my head), and he rumbles untouched for a touchdown. I loved this play for three reasons: (a) run out of an obvious passing set, that keeps the defense wondering what's coming; (b) anytime you have two Pro Bowlers blocking for another Pro Bowler, good things will probably happen, but especially (c) Solari understood the situation. We're up 28-17. A field goal there is what you have to have. If you get the six, great, but don't risk the interception, don't risk the sure-fire two TD lead.

Again, I am not a fan of Mike Solari, but every once in a while, he gives you a reason to hope that maybe he knows what he's doing. If he had more of those moments, maybe we wouldn't have needed all the help we got Sunday.

* Turning point of the game: mid 4th quarter. Jags cut it to 35-30, and they're ready to go for two. I'm cold. Its snowing. I look down, muttering or swearing about the latest defensive meltdown, and think "wait a second". I stop. I hand the radio, headphones, and my gloves to Nancy, I hand my beer to Sheila. And I take off my pullover Chiefs windbreaker I had put on early in the game.

Everyone was like "what the hell is he doing?!?!" If you sit by me, hell if you even know a little bit about me, you know I FREAKING HATE THE COLD! And I'm taking clothes off in it?!?! What the hell?!?!

The answer: I had worn said pullover coat twice this year. I wore it for Cincinnati, because it actually deflects the rain pretty well. And I wore it for Baltimore, because it actually blocks the wind pretty well too. Once I realized I'd worn it to the only two home games we lost, off it came. The lesson, as always: don't keep wearing stuff that we lose in. The Jags, of course, fumbled the center exchange on the two point try ... and never ran a play from scrimmage again. Even though I lost my voice, I can't breathe through my nose due to congestion, and my head is pounding from whatever the hell I caught as a result of standing in the snow with just a rugby shirt and a pair of track pants on: you're welcome.

* Brilliant play call (and decision) of the game number four: 4th and 3, 1:57 to play, at the Jaguars 31. Chiefs up 35-30. Herm sends in the punting unit. In section 132, the self-described hottest 29 year old in the stadium fires off angry text message to married friends that reads "your wife has more balls than our head coach".

Suddenly, Trent Green jogs out onto the field, runs up to Tony Corrente, stands by him, lets the play clock tick down, and calls timeout with 1:31 to play.

I don't know if Herm sent him out. I don't know if Trent said "f*ck it, we're not playing like this anymore, we're here to win" and ran out there on his own. But after the timeout, Trent and the offense took the field, and we were playing to win. Hello! You play to win the game!

From the formation, I'm assuming it was going to be a 4-5 yard out pattern to Gonzalez, with Wilson as the bailout option. Trent sends Tony G in motion ... and the Jags jump. Weigmann and Green know what that means, and Casey snaps it to Green, who immediately spikes it. After a few tense moments, Tony Corrente correctly points out that "Number 88 was shifting, which is legal, therefore, offsides, 92, defense. 5 yard penalty. The result of the play is a first down!" Game over. Season on.

* "Playoffs? Don't talk about ... playoffs? You kidding me? Playoffs?" Holy crap. We're in. The Chiefs are freaking in!

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