Wednesday, May 13, 2009

don't be heartless.

The smile.

God, I love the smile.

You know, the one that you see the moment someone knows he's taken a huge, huge risk, and he's absolutely nailed it. We saw it last year, with David Cook covering "Hello", as he hit the final chorus. That confident little smirk, the self-realization that "holy crap, this worked!", and the satisfaction that comes from that moment. I love it.

Last night, we witnessed it again, as the guy I'm rooting for on "Idol" absolutely nailed, just nailed, his final performance of the night. And it couldn't have happened to a more deserving guy.

You know, the guy the judges are intentionally trying to sabotage. By going on various talk shows and saying his "voice isn't good enough", that he's "not dynamic enough". By Simon, realizing his dream match-up should be in serious trouble, pleading with viewers to vote for Adam and Danny ... but never once mentioning THE best person left in this competition.

So since the judges won't do it, won't give him praise, legitimate praise and genuine compliments not loaded with back-handed dings, since even Ryan dismisses him with a "his last chance, can he do it" wave of the wrist, I will.

Kris Allen rocked the house last night.

From the moment he stepped up next to Ryan and announced his rather stunning choice of a song to perform, you just sensed something magical was going to happen. You can't give a mediocre performance of a Kanye West song. Particularly the one he chose, "Heartless". Either it was going to be an epic flameout ...

Or it was going to be what it was. What it should be remembered for being.

Unquestionably, the best performance of the night. Arguably, the best performance of the season.

And a performance that had damned well better ensure Kris a spot in the final two.

Especially when you consider the "competition" last night --

* What was with Adam? The arrangement for "One" was horrendous. I'll grant you that he did all he could with it, but not even God could clean up that clusterf*ck of an arrangement and make it sound appealing. And for "Cryin'", the first verse, someone hit that backup singer with a crowbar already. I'm guessing someone did: she was nowhere to be found after the first time through the chorus. When Simon was begging for votes for Adam, he must have been feeling the exact same way I did: holy crap, this guy sucked something awful tonight.

* and Danny. Sweet Jesus, how is this guy still in the competition? He defecated all over "Dream On" last week. He murdered "September" three weeks ago. And if he brings up his dead wife one more time, I'm literally going to start throwing things at the television. I swear, I haven't hated a contestant this much since Katherine McPhee. I didn't even hate Asshat Archuleta last season as much as I hate Danny (Go Away) Gokey.

* and of course, the judges. What's that? They're objective, unbiased, able to discern quality from something other than quality? You got the wrong show if you think that, pal. They're pushing an agenda. A Danny / Adam final that won't be even remotely entertaining. Really, for all these four blowhards talk about how Kris has a weak voice and Kris wouldn't hold his own against Adam ... they think Danny would? Are you kidding me? Agh. This show really makes me feel the need to drink sometimes.

* and even Ryan was piling on last night, expressing shock -- shock! -- that Kris would dare to think outside the box and pick a song from more recent than 17 years ago. Let that sink in. The ONLY performer last night who performed a song released after 1993, was Kris. And he did both of them.

You want contemporary, Simon? You want someone who'll throw down some hot tracks, Randy? You want someone who makes Kara and Pauler climax on air? Kris is your guy. His only clunker of the season ("All She Wants to Do Is Dance") was STILL better than half of Danny (Go Away) Gokey's efforts. Especially this week's two abortions of a performance that somehow the judges found enjoyable.

Oh well, enough ranting. I need to save my energy for the inevitable "Syesha Mercado Memorial Screw Job" we're about to see tonight on Kris. Hope I'm wrong. Knowing this show, I'm betting I'm not, and once again, the kid who mopped the floor with the competition in the final three, will be on the outside looking in. But sweet Jesus, I pray I'm wrong ...

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