(my favorite pic of bj so far. inspiring. photo: bucks.com)
Its here!
Its freaking here!
My favorite stretch of the sports calendar dawns on Saturday. 40 games in 40 nights. The NBA playoffs!
And for the first time in four years, some (un)lucky team gets to Fear the Deer!
My first round playoff predictions, and a few other random thoughts, set to the tunes on my iPod ... (TNT network announcer voice) begins right now:
(warning: this is one freaking long post. Might want to hit the "boss button" that Gregg Easterbrook puts in his columns ...)
* The NBA Playoffs.
Song that describes this time of year: "Ain't Nothin' Bout You" by Brooks and Dunn:
"Its a perfect passion,
And I can't get enough --
The way you look,
The way you laugh,
The way you love with all you have,
There ain't nothing about you,
That don't do something for me.
The way you kiss,
The way you cry,
The way you move when you walk by,
There ain't nothing about you,
That don't do something for me ..."
* Eastern Conference:
1 Cavaliers vs 8 Bulls.
Song that describes this series: "Fantasy" by Earth, Wind and Fire:
"Come and see! Victory!
In a land called fantasy!
Loving life, for you and me!
To behold your soul is ecstacy! ..."
Congrats to the Bulls for overcoming a 3 games back with 5 to go deficit and, uuh, outlasting? the Raptors to get in. The Bulls closing surge ensures that every playoff team is at least .500 this year. Its been a while since that happened, given how god awful the middle (and especially the bottom) of the Eastern Conference has been this decade.
Only three 8 seeds have ever won a first round matchup. The 1994 Denver Nuggets, who stunned the Seattle SuperSonics in five games (back when first round series were a best of five). The 2007 Golden State Warriors, who pulled off arguably the biggest upset in NBA first round history by beating the 67 win and defending Western Conference champion Dallas Mavericks in six games.
And of course, the 1999 New York Knicks, who remain the only eight seed to advance past the second round, somehow winning the Eastern Conference before losing to the Spurs in five games, the first of four titles for Tim Duncan. (Was it really just 10 short seasons ago that the Knicks were well-run, competently coached, talented, and capable of winning a game after January 15th?)
The point, of course, is that eight seeds are usually seeded eight for a reason. They're the best of the worst. Or the worst of the best, depending on how you look at it. This Bulls team isn't going to repeat what the Nuggets, Warriors, and Knicks did before them. Call me crazy, but when your head coach and GM are literally throwing down after a win, you've got serious problems. And the (don fambrough voice) throwdown, showdown, hoedown!, whatever you call it, between Vinny Del Negro and John Paxson isn't even the Bulls biggest problem. Cleveland has this guy named LeBron James, who rumor has it is pretty damned good.
This one should get ugly early and stay that way throughout. I'd like to give the Bulls game four, because even the worst of NBA playoff teams usually manages to win once at home, but in the words of the New York side of my family, "fuhgedaboudit". Its a Fantasy to assume anything other than a Cavs sweep. Which is what I'm predicting. Cavs sweep.
2 Magic vs 7 Bobcats.
Song that describes this series: "Second Place Victory" by This Day and Age:
"Let's show them how to live.
Accept the pain, always forgive.
Watch the sun go down,
Learn the sound of following
All that's complete ..."
Now this is what Hubie Brown would call an "intriguing matchup". At least to me anyways. If there's one coach in the playoffs I don't want to bet against ... well, its probably Phil Jackson.
Or Larry Brown. Who (amazingly) still remains as the only coach to win both a NCAA championship, and a NBA championship.
(And only two NFL coaches have accomplished that feat, of winning both the NCAA and NFL championships. Both coached for the same team. One replaced the other one, in fact. Jimmy Johnson and Barry Switzer. I am the King of Useless Trivia ...)
In my mind, it always seems like the less that is expected out of a Larry Brown coached team, the better they do. Such as with this season. Nobody thought Charlotte was anything other than a fringe playoff contender. Including myself. As I noted in my season preview:
"The Bobcats ... ugh. They really should sign Nathan Scott to play for them; he can't be any worse than half their roster".
Yet here they are, solidly in the playoff field, posting their first ever winning season, not having to rely on characters from "One Tree Hill" to put up 20 every night.
And they match up really well against Orlando to boot.
The key to this series will be how Orlando starts. Last year they dropped game one at home to Philly, looked awful in a game two victory, and got blown out in Philly in game three before finally waking up and taking care of a mediocre Sixers team. This Bobcats team is better than that Philly team in every regard. If they can steal game one or two in Orlando, look out.
Having said that ... I don't see it happening. Bobcats win game three at home to make it interesting for a weekend, but the Magic are just too deep to lose this early. Magic in five.
3 Hawks vs 6 Bucks.
Song that describes this series: "More Than This" by Matt Nathanson:
"I said, What am I supposed to do?
I built the scenes around you!
And I need more than this!
And she said, What am I supposed to do?
Look at what's become of you!
And I need more than this ..."
What could have been. Two weeks ago, the Bucks were THE team to avoid in the East first round. Then Amare Stoudamire's classless cheap shot to Andrew Bogut that ended his season, killed the Bucks hopes of going deep in the playoffs.
Everyone is writing this Bucks team off. Too young. Too many injuries. A nice story, but the final chapter is about to be written by Atlanta. But something Bob Knight once said keeps nagging in my mind. Knight's Indiana team was trailing LSU in the tournament. LSU was the better team, and it was showing. In the postgame, after Indiana rallied to win, a reporter asked Knight if he was ever worried about his team's ability to come back and win the game. Knight's response: "I was for a moment. Then I looked down the court, saw (LSU coach) Dale Brown, and knew we'd win this game".
When I look at this series, if I'm Scotty Skiles, I look down the court, I see Mike Woodson, and I definitely believe I can win this series.
I really don't know what to make of the Hawks. They're horribly coached. They have no home court advantage whatsoever. For some reason they're still trotting out Mike Bibby for 30 minutes a night, even though he's a shell of his "grapefruits!" performance in the 2002 playoffs. They have a really solid core group of players in Al Horford, Josh Smith, Joe Johnson, Marvin Williams, and Jamal Crawford ... and yet, against the top two seeds in each conference (Lakers, Mavericks, Cavs, Magic), the Hawks could only manage to win 3 out of 11 legitimately contested games (they did win four of twelve, I know, but beating a Cleveland team resting all five starters on Wednesday doesn't count as legitimate competition). And in the showdowns with their fellow divisional playoff teams, they went 1-3 against Orlando (all three losses by 17+ points), 1-3 against Miami (with two of the three losses by 20+), and managed to go 2-2 against Charlotte, but needed double overtime for one win, and got blasted by 20 in a loss. Basically, the Hawks got here by beating up on the horrid teams in this league. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Its just not a good sign for playoff success to come. Because the Timberwolves, Wizards, and Pacers of the league are through playing for the year.
Head to head, these two teams played some really good games this year. The Hawks won by four in overtime in late February. The Bucks won by three in late March. And the Hawks won Monday night by eight in a game in which both sides rested their key players to avoid the risk of (further) injury.
I think this will be the second best first round matchup by the time its finished. An instant classic. I really want to pick the Bucks in this spot, because they're extremely well coached, have a fantastic "us against the world" mentality, and somehow won 46 games despite their two best players being out for the season. That, and I'm biased. Fear the Deer! In the end though, any logical person would conclude that it's experience that will make the difference. The Bucks haven't been to the playoffs in four years. Hell, this is their first above-.500 season since the run to the Eastern Finals nine years ago. None of their core guys save for Salmons and Ridnour have experienced the postseason. The Hawks core has that thrilling seven game defeat to the eventual champion Celtics two years ago, plus their playoff run last year that saw them beat Miami in the first round before Cleveland knocked them out. Logic says the Hawks in ...
(steve reconsidering ...)
You know what? I picked the wrong song. Yes, I want "More Than This". I want more than 46 wins and a first round exit. And let's be honest -- you have to be mentally retarded or named Steve to pick Milwaukee in this series.
Hold it. (steve checking his driver's licence) Hey! My name is Steve!
REVISED Song to describe this series: "What a Fool Believes" by the Doobie Brothers.
"He came from somewhere back in her long ago,
Sentimental fool, trying hard to recreate
What had yet to be created.
For once in her life, she mustered a smile,
For his nostalgic tale.
Never coming near what they wanted to say.
Only to realize ...
It never really was.
She had a place in his life.
He never made her think twice.
As he rises to her apology,
Anybody else would surely know,
He's watching her go ...
But what a fool believes!
He sees! The wise man has the power
To reason away ...
Cause what seems to be,
Is always better than nothing!
Than nothing at all ..."
I'm pushing every effing chip into the middle of the table. I Fear the Deer! I'm a fool, and I believe! I want "More Than This"! Work Hard! Play Hard! We're doing this! We've come too far, too effing far, to fail now! Bucks in six; they steal game two in Atlanta and successfully defend the Fortress on Fourth all three times. Fear the Deer!
4 Celtics vs 5 Heat.
Song that describes this series: "Second Chance" by Shinedown:
"Please don't cry one tear for me,
I'm not afraid of what I have to say,
This is my one and only voice,
So listen close -- Its only for today ...
Tell my mother! Tell my father!
I've done the best I can
To make them realize, This is my life
I hope they understand.
I'm not angry, I'm just saying --
Sometimes goodbye is a second chance ..."
I'm probably the only person on the planet that hasn't written off Boston yet. I know they're limping to the finish line. I know they're nowhere near as good as they were two years ago when they won the O'Brien Trophy.
I just never bet against a proven, veteran team with its back to the wall. Especially if they have home field advantage.
For all the concern and fear and panic, this is still a Celtics team that won 50 plus games for a third straight year. They're still a decided favorite over a mediocre Heat squad that is a one-man show most nights. And if there's one team in the East that won't be intimidated by the prospect of meeting Cleveland in the next round, its the Celtics. No, this isn't the Celtics of two years ago. But this is still a team capable of beating anybody, on any night, in any arena. They're getting their Second Chance. They won't blow it. At least in round one. C's in six.
* Western Conference:
1 Lakers v 8 "Kevin Durant's Team".
Song that describes this series: "King of Wishful Thinking" by Go West:
"If I don't listen to the talk of the town,
Then maybe I can fool myself;
I'll get over you, I know I will;
I'll pretend my ship's not sinking ...
And I'll tell myself, I'm over you,
Cause I'm the king of wishful thinking ..."
An awful draw for KD's Team, who true name will never be typed or said on this site until Seattle gets a team again. All the young talent KD's Team has really came together this year. They're a fun, up-tempo team that might scare the Lakers for a game or two.
But this is still the Lakers. The defending league champions. The two time defending Western Conference champions. Coached by the best coach of the modern era. Still employing the most clutch player in the league.
Now, we'll see if the Lakers made a great move, or a horrendous mistake, in essentially trading Trevor Ariza for Ron Artest. This is where Artest has to deliver, he has to become the shut-down defender that he's known for being (and that Ariza will never be). You know going in that Durant is going to get 30. Its a matter of keeping Jeff Green and Russell Westbrook from matching that 30, and the key to preventing that is Artest.
Should be a fun series while it lasts. Both teams like to run, which makes for great entertainment. Lakers in six; the Durants take games three and four at home before losing a heartbreaker in game six.
2 Mavericks vs 7 Spurs.
Song to describe this series: "Hello" by Lionel Richie (and perfected by David Cook):
"I can see it in your eyes!
I can see it in your smile!
You're all I've ever wanted,
And my arms are open wide.
Cause you know just what to say,
And you know just what to do,
And I want to tell you so much ...
I love you"
THIS is the matchup I'm most looking forward to.
These two always stage an epic battle when they meet (last year being the exception, as the Mavericks rolled in five). Their 2006 series is one of the three best playoff series of the decade (along with last year's Boston / Chicago first rounder, and the defining series of the decade, Kings / Lakers in the 2002 Western Finals).
The Spurs struggled for most of this season, but achieved something remarkable: an 11th consecutive 50 win season. That's just sick. If you throw out the lockout season (when the league only played 50 games), its 12 straight seasons. And go figure, the lockout year? The Spurs won their first of four O'Brien Trophies.
The Mavericks poured it on after the trade for Caron Butler, vaulting from middle of the pack in the West, to the two seed. The Mavs also have an impressive 50 win streak going -- 10 straight. Every year that Mark Cuban has owned the team, they've won at least 50.
The difference, though, is in the postseason. San Antonio has been extremely successful, while Dallas ... not so much. The Spurs have four championships in the last eleven seasons. The Mavs have made it to the Finals just once (2006, when extremely fishy officiating screwed them out of a title). The Spurs have only lost in the first round once in this run, last year to Dallas. The Mavs have lost in the first round three times (all as the higher seed), and have only made the Western Finals twice, losing once to the Spurs and defeating Phoenix in its Finals run four years ago.
This matchup really intrigues me. In the Spurs, you have the last gasp of a fading champion. The moves they made this offseason, specifically going over the luxury tax threshold to get Richard Jefferson, was all designed to make one last run at a championship. Dallas, on the other hand, is well positioned for the next three to four seasons, as the moves they made were designed to improve the team, but also keep it competitive long term.
The series is going to come down to the health of the Spurs. If Tony Parker is a go at anything close to full strength, this will be a seven game instant classic. If he's not, I wonder if George Hill is up to the task of dealing with Jason Kidd. Either way, the winner of this series is winning the Western Conference. The winner will rout Phoenix in five, and beat the Lakers in six. My best guess? Mavericks in seven. But the Spurs are just as capable of winning this series and making a deep playoff run.
3 Suns vs 6 Trail Blazers.
Song that describes this series: "Breakeven" by The Script:
"I'm still alive, but I'm barely breathing.
Just praying to a God that I don't believe in.
Cause I got time while she got freedom,
Cause when a heart breaks, no it don't break even ...
What am I supposed to do,
When the best part of me was always you, and
What am I supposed to say,
When I'm choked up that you're ok,
I'm Falling to pieces, yeah
I'm Falling to pieces ..."
This matchup would have been knock-out good prior to last Sunday, when Portland lost All Star Brandon Roy for the season. Somehow the Blazers have overcome nearly 500 missed player games this year to win 50 and finish 6th. As good a job as Scott Skiles did in Milwaukee, how can Nate McMillan NOT be Coach of the Year?
Ditto the Suns, who finished strong despite big guy Robin Lopez' injury. If both these teams were at full strength, this would have been an amazing series on paper. Given the injuries, it probably won't be that great. I'm just hoping for a "break even" decently contested series.
I see Portland putting up a fight through at least game three. If they're down 0-3 at that point, as I think they will be, I'm not sure they'll show up for game four. Suns sweep.
4 Nuggets vs 5 Jazz.
Song that describes this series: "Memory", from the Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber play "Cats":
"Memory!
All alone in the moonlight!
I can dream of the old days,
Life was beautiful then.
I remember the time I knew what happiness was.
Let the memory live again ..."
What a horrid night Wednesday was for Utah. They could have finished as high as the two seed. Instead, they're not only seeded fifth, they lost home court advantage as well. The Nuggets are another one of those "how the hell did they overcome all this?" type of teams. Head coach George Karl is sidelined while battling cancer. Kenyon Martin is questionable with leg issues.
Again, like Phoenix / Portland, if both teams were at full strength, this would be a battle. Given the injuries, and the uncertain life status of the Nuggets' head coach, I see a relatively easy Utah win in this series. Jazz in five.
* The Royals.
Song to describe these guys: "Freedom" by Wham.
"I don't want your freedom!
I don't want to play around!
I don't want nobody baby --
Part time love just brings me down.
I don't need your freedom --
Girl all I want right now is you ..."
My boycott of this ballclub lasted five days. I made it to Saturday. (Which, to be fair, is four days longer than I would have bet on). The Boyz n Blue are off to a decent start. 4-5 after nine games, but they took two of three in Detroit, and should have taken all three, if the bullpen hadn't imploded in game two of that series (turning a 5-0 lead into a 6-5 loss in the span of seven hitters. Nice going guys).
What encourages me so far is the starting pitching. If your starter gives you a quality start 80% of the time, you're going to win more than most teams. Greinke has had two good starts. Meche look awful on Sunday, but he's still coming back from injury and should recover. Hochevar has been lights out. Kyle Davies looked good on Monday. And Bannister had six scoreless innings on Tuesday before the implosion.
What scares me is the bullpen. Its worse than anyone feared, and its not like any Royals fan entered this season thinking we had a decent bullpen. Watching the 'pen so far reminds me of the 2002 Chiefs defense after a couple games. We all knew entering 2002 our defense was atrocious. After a couple weeks, giving up 39 to Cleveland, 41 in New England, and 30 to Miami, you just shook your head that it was worse than even you'd imagined it'd be. (And stunningly, we won 2 of those first games, and the only loss was in overtime. Man I miss the Al Saunders playbook).
Just for sh*ts and giggles, here's your bullpen stats so far (courtesy of espn.com):
Juan Cruz: 4.2 IP, 1.93 ERA. 0-0, 0 saves, 2 holds. 7 hits, 1 run allowed (earned), 3 walks, 6 strikeouts. The ERA is encouraging ... but 10 baserunners allowed in 4.2 IP means he's basically allowing every other batter he faces to reach base. This is NOT going to end well if that rate keeps up.
Joakim Soria: 3.2 IP, 2.45 ERA. 0-0, 2 saves, 0 holds. 3 hits, 1 run allowed (earned), 1 walk, 6 strikeouts. Has only pitched poorly in one outing, a blown save against Detroit in the second game. The Mexicutioner appears to be back. Which is huge. Now we just have to solve getting through the seventh and eighth innings.
Kyle Farnsworth: 3.2 IP, 2.45 ERA. 1-0, 0 saves, 0 holds. 5 hits, 1 run allowed (earned), 0 walks, 2 strikeouts. Had a solid outing against Detroit after Soria blew the save, pitching two scoreless innings. Is finally pitching up to his contract?
Robinson Tejada: 4.0 IP, 9.00 ERA. 0-1, 0 saves, 0 holds. 6 hits, 4 runs (earned), 6 walks, 3 strikeouts. Again, that's 12 baserunners and only 12 recorded outs. Literally every other batter reaches base against this guy. Explains the 9.00 ERA. And a sign of what's to come for Cruz if he keeps his stats going.
Dusty Hughes: 3.0 IP, 12.00 ERA. 0-1, 0 saves, 1 hold. 3 hits, 4 runs (earned) 4 walks, 3 strikeouts. Horrendous. Although to be fair, most of his issues were limited to one game.
Roman Colon: 2.0 IP, 18.00 ERA. 0-0, 0 saves, 0 holds. 5 hits, 4 runs (earned), 2 walks, 1 strikeout. You'd think this is as bad as it gets. You would be wrong.
Luis Mendoza: 3.0 IP, 24.00 ERA. 0-1, 0 saves, 0 holds. 7 hits, 8 runs (earned), 2 walks, 1 strikeout. If my name was Luis Mendoza, I'd definitely be renting, not buying, wherever I chose to live at. Because he's not long for that bullpen at this point. Unlike Hughes, who had one bad outing hurting his season so far, Mendoza has been god awful consistently. He's already allowed 3 home runs as well.
Another positive so far: the hitting. Jose Guillen has been really good so far. Rick Ankiel has shocked me at how decent he's been. Even Yuniesky Betancourt hasn't crapped on the field yet. We've survived without Alex Gordon as well. As I noted at the beginning of the year, our starting pitching is solid enough that if the Royals can consistently get 4 runs out of their offense, .500 is a realistic goal. So far this season, the Royals have scored 4 or more five times, and are 3-2 in those games. They also are averaging exactly 5 runs a game (45 runs in 9 games played). If those stats continue (highly doubtful, granted, but a kid can dream), if this holds up, the Royals might be buyers come July 31st.
* "Lost".
Song to describe this show: "I Will Wait" by Hootie and the Blowfish:
"When I wake to find the silence of
All that we've become,
I can't wait to make you promises
That I'd be leery of ...
Take me down, let me see ...
I'll be there waiting for you!
Every morning when times have changed.
I'll be there, through the rise and fall,
I'll be standing like a soldier for you!
You hold your secrets,
Through the days when I need to be alone,
I will wait for you!
Through the rise and fall ..."
Another amazing episode of "Lost" on Tuesday night. Two shocking explosions, two "holy f*cking sh*t, that did NOT just happen!" scenes -- one early on, the other to close the episode, and one amazing kiss that triggered another Lostie's memories of the Island in the sideways world. I'm gonna miss this show.
Seriously, this show is so freaking addicting. I live for Tuesday nights at 8pm at this point. I totally dig the sideways world. I know I'm in the minority, in that I am fascinated by the sideways world, and really don't give a crap about the Island timeline at this point. Its the way that they're unveiling consciousness and "reality" in the sideways world that I'm totally jonesing on. That scene on the beach Tuesday night, when Libby goes in for the kiss, and every Island memory comes crashing back for Hurley ... just jaw-dropping awesome. This is two weeks in a row with a "romantic" scene between connected characters in the Island world finally meeting up in the sideways world, and I defy anyone to argue that those aren't two of the best scenes in the history of the show. Last week's was tear-inducing. Desmond fainting as he simply touched Penny's hand, realizing that he was seeing her "in another life, brother". And this week, the beach scene. I get that "Lost" is over the head of a lot of people. But at its heart, its core, its a simple love story. As Norm put it to Sammy in the "Cheers" finale: "I don't think it matters who you love. It could be a person, it could be a thing, so long as you love it totally, and completely, and without judgment. You can never be unfaithful to your one true love. You will always come back to her".
At this point, the producers could answer no more questions, and I'd be fine with how the season has played out. We all have a constant. We're destined to be with that constant in whatever universe we occupy. That's pretty damned cool in my book.
Well, actually, as cool as that is, that's a lie. There is one resolution that I do need to see happen. "Maybe we'll meet for some coffee". It has to happen. She did create the sideways world, dammit, by sacrificing her life to detonate Jughead! She said "it worked"! They have to reunite in the new timeline! I mean, what better way to close this show than to have sideways Juliet meet sideways Sawyer, in a coffee shop, making small talk, they lean across the table for the first kiss, and it all comes flashing back to them both. I'd probably keel over dead from the excitement. I'd be happier than if I was doped up on ecstasy and sharing a bed with three of Vivid Video's finest stars. That's how I'd end it, the final connection, or re-connection. Juliet and Sawyer.
That deserves its own theme song --
Song to describe the Juliet / Sawyer reunion: "Check Yes Juliet" by We The Kings:
"Run baby run,
Don't ever look back.
They'll tear us apart if
You give them the chance.
Don't sell your heart, don't say
We're not meant to be.
Run baby run, and forever we'll be
You and me ..."
* The Tea Party Folks.
Song that describes these folks: "Cry Me a River" by Justin Timberlake:
"You don't have to say,
What you did.
I already know.
I found out from him!
Now there's just no chance,
For you and me,
That'll never be!
And don't that make you sad about it ...
Girl I refuse!
You must have me confused with some other guy.
The bridges were burned,
And now its your turn to cry, so
Cry me a river!
Cry me a river!
Cry me a river!
Cry me a river ..."
I see the Tea Party folks are organizing and rallying all over the nation. Again. Look it, I don't have a problem with them. And God knows I am anything but a fan of President Obama. But someone needs to tell these Tea Party folks that the reason they're in the minority, the reason most of the nation doesn't think highly of them, is because they are the people who put the country in the proverbial toilet in the first place. Every bailout, stimulus bill, and unemployment bill that Obama and the Congress are having to pass is due to the failures of the prior administration. Which these quacks owned. Dominated. They had their chance. They blew it.
Obama isn't the one who recklessly cut taxes, let spending balloon out of control (ok, he's getting close on this one), and cut regulation of the lending industry to joke-like levels. I've said it before and I'll say it again: the time has come to vote the fringe elements of both parties out of power, and return to what we had in the late 1980s and most of the 1990s: a centrist run government that is fiscally sound and socially liberal. The nation works best when it runs in the middle. Not when the kook fringe left or kook fringe right have a stranglehold on power.
* IndyCar racing.
Song that describes race weekend: "Anthem of Our Dying Day" by Story of the Year:
"The stars will cry the blackest tears tonight.
And this is the moment that I live for!
I can smell the ocean air!
Here I am! Pouring my heart onto these rooftops!
Just a ghost to the world,
But that's exactly, exactly what I need.
From up here the city lights burn!
Like a thousand miles of fire!
And I'm here to sing this anthem
Of our dying day ..."
Just two weeks until my favorite weekend of the spring! I still wish the IRL hadn't moved the race from July (when you were guaranteed 95 and sunny) to late April / early May (when you are guaranteed neither). Of course, I'm still mad as hell that the IRL changed the qualifying process for the Indy 500. What used to be four days of qualifying fun, is now just two. And the pole provisions are so screwy I can't even figure them out. At least they left "Billy Boat Memorial" Bump Day pretty much untouched. (To be fair, moving what used to be day 3 of qualifying, for spots 23-33, to Bump Day will make that special day even better. But I hate combining days one and two into one day).
Still, moving the IndyCar and truck races back one weekend, into May, should help. The early spring we've been having bodes well for race weekend as well. (You have to love that we've had 4 days in the 80s this week. Even last Saturday, in the high 60s, was so comfortable that you didn't need a t-shirt if you were outside. My kind of weather!)
Hopefully it'll be an exciting race. An eventful race. An awesome, sun drenched, humid day for tailgating. A day, a weekend that anyone who is there won't forget.
I haven't seen an IRL race yet this year, so I'm playing catch-up for the gambling pool. But there are few sporting events funner than the IRL live. Especially if you do it right and get out there 5 hours early to tailgate a beautiful day in the 80s away.
* The NFL Draft.
Song that describes the draft: "Remember the Name" by Fort Minor:
"This is ten percent luck,
Twenty percent skill,
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will;
Five percent pleasure,
Fifty percent pain,
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name ..."
The draft is a week from now. I prefer the Chiefs not to take one of the three offensive tackles, mainly because I strongly believe that if you're drafting in the top 5 or 6 of the draft, you damned well better get an impact, franchise player out of that pick. The Chiefs are picking in the top 5 for only the 5th time in 22 years. The first two times (1988, 1989), they did the smart thing and went for an impact, franchise player, drafting Neil Smith and Derrick Thomas. The last two years, we've gone Glenn Dorsey and Tyson Jackson. I didn't mind the Dorsey pick, but I vehemently opposed the Jackson pick, because a nose tackle is NOT an impact, franchise position. Can you name four nose tackles in the NFL? (I can't). Can you name the last time a nose tackle forced the opposition to adjust their offensive scheme to account for him?
Top five picks have to be (in my opinion) a quarterback, running back, defensive end, linebacker, or secondary starter (corner or safety). My actual preference is for the Chiefs to trade down into the 10-12 range (I know, good luck finding a trading partner), and then drafting Rolando McClain out of Alabama. You let McClain, already a natural leader for the national champions, you let him learn for a year under Mike Vrabel, and I really think good things are going to happen.
If we stay at five, though, please. Don't waste a pick on an offensive tackle. They're not an impact, franchise position. They're an important position, but not important enough to fork over $30 million over 5 years to fill.
* UFL expansion.
Song to describe this story: "I Want it That Way" by the Backstreet Boys:
"Tell me why (ain't nothing but a heartache),
Tell me why (ain't nothing but a mistake),
Tell me why (I never wanna hear you say)
I want it that way ..."
(I still consider the Ed Hochuli version I came up with to this song to be my finest hour as a writer ... its that, or the Week 4 Plea. Definitely one of those two).
With the news yesterday that Omaha is getting a UFL franchise, I again appeal to the folks running the UFL to do the right thing, to do the thing the USFL did. (At least until Donald Trump took over and ran the league into the ground). Play summer football!
I would absolutely drive 2 1/2 hours to Omaha on a Saturday morning, tailgate the day away, and watch a game. Especially at UFL prices. I think a lot of Chiefs fans would. By playing in the fall, you get no publicity, you don't give your players a chance to catch on with another team (like they'd definitely have if you played your season from May to July, ending it just before training camp opens), and you really frustrate people like me who want football year round.
* Boozin' at the State Department.
Song to describe this story: "I Like Beer" by Tom T. Hall:
"I like beer!
It makes me a jolly good fellow ..."
Awesome story in the Washington Times this morning on how huge an alcohol tab the State Department is running under Hillary Clinton. According to the Times, "last year alone, the State Department sent taxpayers tabs totaling nearly $300,000 for alcoholic beverages -- about twice as much compared to the previous year". In Hillary's defense ... if I had to swallow my pride and work for someone who isn't even 1/1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000th as qualified for the Presidency as she is, I'd probably rack up one helluva tab too.
* Kasey Kahne to Hendrick Motorsports.
Song to describe this development: "Such Great Heights" by the Postal Service:
"They won't see us waving from such great heights,
Come down now, they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
Come down now, but we'll stay ..."
Ugh. I freaking hate Rick Hendrick. I despise Jimmie Johnson. I'm not a Jeff Gordon fan. (Although I respect both the 24 and 48 immensely, they are clearly the two best drivers of the last two decades, and the only other US-series based driver to consider joining that duo at the top is Castroneves). This is like Neil Smith signing with the broncos back in the day. Its going to take some getting used to, that's for sure. Still, considering the crappy teams Kasey's driven for since coming up to Cup in 2004, and considering the amazing achievements he's had despise inferior equipment and god-awful ownership (11 wins, 2 Chase appearances, and along with Tony Stewart, turned the 2005 Brickyard 400 into the best NASCAR race I've ever seen in person), this is a good move. If you can't compete for a championship at Hendrick Motorsports, either you're a horrible driver (Casey Mears! Mike Skinner!), or your name is Dale Earnhardt Jr.
* Chiefs schedule coming Tuesday.
Song to describe the ridiculous delay: "Praying for Time" by George Michael:
"The rich declare themselves poor.
And most of us are not sure
If we have too much, but we'll take our chances,
Cause God stopped keeping score.
I guess somewhere along the way,
He must have let us all out to play,
Turned his back, and all God's children
Crept out the back door.
Its hard to love,
When there's so much to hate.
And its hard to hope
When there is no hope to speak of.
And the wounded skies above,
Say its much too late.
So maybe we should all
Be praying for time ..."
Finally, the schedule comes out on Tuesday. Enjoy this one -- 2010 might be the last professional football we see in Kansas City for a couple years. The labor battle is going to be ugly, brutal, and won't be resolved without a work stoppage. Especially if the owners continue to lie about losing money, all while refusing to prove it by showing the accounting books to the players union. (I am 100 percent behind the players on most of the issues. And if the owners weren't lying, they'd show the books to prove they are hemorraging money. They're not. You have to be mentally retarded or named Bill Bidwell to lose money in the NFL. And even the Bidwell's are turning a profit).
The Chiefs are virtually assured to open on the road, since the Royals are home on September 12th, and I highly doubt the Chiefs are getting the early Monday nighter on Opening Weekend. So, even though I'm sure I've already done this elsewhere, here's my final version of how I'd like to see the schedule unfold:
Week 1: Sunday, September 12th, at Houston. (noon, CBS). Let's open the season right, with a tailgate in Reliant. Those folks know how to party down there. Plus it should be nice and toasty for tailgating ... and 71 and air-conditioned for the game. Remind me again why we didn't approve the rolling roof for Arrowhead and Kauffman? (Because the voters of Jackson County are certified idiots. See Funkhouser, Mark; Cleaver, Rev. Emanuel III; Shields, Kathryn as prime examples of my county's idiocy).
Week 2: Sunday, September 19th, vs Tennessee. (noon, CBS). A good gauge game of where we're at. I firmly believe the Chiefs will improve by at least 4 games this year, and probably more than that, simply because of the schedule. Its really that much easier than the last couple years. Tennessee figures to be one of the 4 or 5 teams battling for the last wildcard spot, so this would potentially be big for tiebreakers.
Week 3: Sunday, September 26th, at Cleveland. (noon, CBS). A very winnable roadie, one of four of them actually.
Week 4: Monday, October 4th, vs denver. (7:30pm, ESPN). Do you realize the Chiefs have hosted denver in prime time only twice in the last 15 years? 1998 (the "Monday Night Meltdown") and 2006 (the Thanksgiving game). That's it. Granted, denver has hosted us a number of times in prime time (most memorably in 1994), but we've only gotten them twice. Its a bitter rivalry between two wildcard contenders. Let's make this happen, schedule makers. (And yes, you're damned right I'd be in line by noon ready to get my drink on for this one).
Week 5: Sunday, October 10th, vs oakland. (noon, CBS). Follow up one hated divisional rival with another. At this point, tell me you can't honestly see 3-2 (or even 4-1) as the Chiefs record. And I haven't even scheduled the four other easy games on the schedule. Or the three very winnable home toss-ups.
Week 6: Sunday, October 17th, at Seattle. (3:15pm, CBS). I am going to this game, actually. Our friends in Oregon are hosting us for the weekend. A weekend spent in beautiful Astoria, Oregon, walking the beaches of the Pacific Ocean, eating freshly caught clams, shrimp, and oysters, and then making the couple hour trek up to Seattle for the game. I can hardly wait.
Week 7: Sunday, October 24th, vs San Diego. (noon, CBS). This isn't the Chargers of the last couple years. They have no running game, their defense is collapsing thanks to age and free agency, and they still employ Norv Turner as their coach.
Week 8: bye. Since Sur William Callahan is not on the Chiefs coaching staff, I'll assume we won't lose.
Week 9: Sunday, November 7th, at St. Louis. (noon, CBS). Again, look at the schedule to this point. There is no reason the Chiefs can't be 5-3 at worst after this game. No reason whatsoever.
Week 10: Sunday, November 14th, vs Arizona. (noon, FOX). Not as attractive of a matchup as it was last year at this point, since Boldin and Warner are gone. But the Cards are still a viable playoff threat.
Week 11: Sunday, November 21st, vs San Francisco. (noon, FOX). The last time the Chiefs and 49ers played, the 49ers failed to cross the 35 yard line. It was also the last time Dante Hall returned a kick for a touchdown. Chiefs won 41-0. Thankfully, the 49ers didn't let denver do the same thing to them later that season.
Week 12: Sunday, November 28th, at San Diego. (3:15pm, CBS). I can think of worse places to spend Thanksgiving weekend than in beautiful sunny Southern California. Frigid Kansas City immediately comes to mind.
Week 13: Sunday, December 5th, at denver. (3:15, CBS). We always seem to play out there late in the year, why not continue that. Plus, now that the mystique of fake mile high is no more, this is winnable.
Week 14: Sunday, December 12th, vs Buffalo. (noon, CBS). A rebuilding Bills team with no quarterback, not much of a running game, and not much of a defense. Very winnable game. Again, look over the schedule to this point. 8-5 after this game is not a crack-pipe smoking dream.
Week 15: Sunday, December 19th, at Indianapolis. (noon, CBS). Yes, on paper, this is an instant loss. But look at when I scheduled it. The odds of the Colts resting their starters by this point are pretty good. Ideally, this would be a week 16 game, but I had other plans for that slot. Which are:
Week 16: Saturday, December 25th, at oakland. (7pm, NFLN). The league plays on Christmas the next two years. Why not put one of its most bitter rivalries on? Whether you love or hate the raiders, they always draw ratings. Its also a very winnable roadie. I would have us at 9-6 at worst entering the finale.
Week 17: Sunday, January 2nd, vs Jacksonville. (noon, CBS). The league screwed the pooch four years ago by not flexing Jacksonville at Kansas City into its final Sunday night slot. Here's hoping they get a chance to correct that. This one could be for the final wildcard slot, or (if the Chargers back up as much as I anticipate they will) the AFC West title.
The key to the schedule is how its laid out. If you get the roadies at Indy and San Diego in the first part of the season, that's tough to recover from. On the other hand, you draw the roadies at Cleveland and St. Louis early on, you give yourself a chance to vault to the head of the division. Let's hope the powers that be at 480 Park Avenue cut the Chiefs some slack this year ...
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