Only a week to go until my favorite summertime show returns. Big Brother 12 is almost here! (Good God, we're up to 12 editions of this crapfest already?!?! Wow, there's a lot of television viewing I'll never get back).
cbs.com has posted some initial cast videos, a video of the house (the password is "cabana"), and some bio's of the cast members. Since it is my lifelong dream to be on this show someday (because really, who do you know that is better at sitting around in the sun, shirtless and getting plastered, than me? I'd dominate this friggin game!), I decided to fill out the questionaire the cast members did, and give my initial impressions of the cast.
Fire away!
* Name: Steve.
* Nickname(s): Stevo.
* Current Residence: South KC, MO.
* Occupation: Accountant.
* Three Adjectives That Describe You: laid back, casual, special.
* Favorite Activities: tailgating; beer pong and volleyball in the pool; washers, cornhole, ladder toss; floating.
* What Do You Think Will Be the Most Difficult Part About Living Inside the Big Brother House: living with people who try too hard, too soon. You can't win this game on day one. Enjoy the joint for a while.
* Strategy For Winning Big Brother: be my usual charming self. That, and wear a fedora. Big pimpin'.
* What Type(s) of People Would You Not Want in the Big Brother House? chicks who think the world is owed to them. Or self-righteous blowhards. I can't stand houseguests who act like there's a moral code involved. You're on a game show where the best liar and schemer wins. There's no morals involved here.
* Which Past Big Brother Cast Member Did You Like the Most and Least? Most: Memphis, everyone's favorite mixologist. (I so need to buy a fedora, those things are friggin sweet!) And Renny, my model for how I'd be on the show. Least: either Chima, or Natalie from the winter edition (I think that was 8, but might have been 9).
* What Are You Afraid Of: earthquakes; flying; snakes.
* What Is the Accomplishment You Are Most Proud Of: not having a sex tape leak out of me yet.
* A Recurring Theme on Big Brother is "Expect the Unexpected". How Would You Handle the "Unexpected": same way as I always do -- with a bottle of wine and a lot of swearing.
* Is There Anything Else You Want the Fans To Know About Yourself: I'm a 33, single, social liberal, slightly delusional, laid back charming dude who's in it to win it!
* Finish This Sentence: "My Life's Motto Is ...": easy --
"So before you knock it, try it first.
You'll see its a blessing, and not a curse.
If you don't like my fire, then don't come around
Cause I'm gonna burn one down!
Yeah, I'm gonna burn one down!"
* And my initial rankings for each cast member, after reading bio's and seeing a couple videos. 13th means I hate them; 1st means I want them to win.
(subject to change once game play begins. Actually, this might become a recurring deal, like how Slezak at ew.com ranks the "Idol" contestants each week ...)
13. Ragan. Props for wearing the bow tie -- nobody's worn those on TV since beloved veteran D/FW weatherman Troy Dungan retired a decade ago. Says he will "use his gayness to win". Aw, that's special.
12. Britney. Very attractive. Hopefully we get at least some partial nudity out of her before she goes home. However, sweetheart -- if you have to tell the audience when you're being sarcastic, you're not really succeeding in being sarcastic.
11. Monet. Seems likable enough ... only she also seems like a drama queen and a diva. Admits she's been raised "like a princess", and that she still lives with her folks and they pay all her bills. I smell Chima 2.0 if she isn't dealt with early on.
10. Lane. He's 24. He played football at Texas Tech. Which means he was a freshman on that Tech team that stormed back from down 30-5 at halftime to beat KU in Lawrence 31-30 in one of the worst games of the Mangino era. Screw him. On the other hand, his favorite BB player ever is Memphis (hey, mine too!!!), so he has that going for him.
9. Rachel. Very attractive. She looks like that hot as hell redhead that "Boy Meets World" drug into the cast the last couple years it was on the air. (Yes, I watched "Boy Meets World". Deal with it. I had a huge, hu-yuge!, crush on Topanga back in the day). She's also a "VIP Cocktail Waitress" in Las Vegas. I'm laying 5:2 odds on her being one of Tiger's "bevy of broads", as the Sun put it.
8. Andrew. A 39 year old "practicing Jew" who has a daughter, but no ring on the finger. Apparently practicing safe sex isn't a commandment in his Torah. (That, or he's divorced. Still, I'm sure his book of religious instruction doesn't smile on either option). His strategory includes using Russell's plan, which is a bit ridiculous, seeing as how Russell was so clueless last year he didn't even realize he was going up for eviction the week he got sent home. He's set up nicely to be the village idiot.
7. Kathy. A 40 year old sheriff's deputy from Texarkana. Has survived breast cancer. Can probably kick my ass eight ways from Sunday, and not break a sweat. Seems a little too happy to be here. On the other hand, I've been to Texarkana a time or two. If I got to leave there for a summer in LA, I'd be a little too happy to be there as well.
6. Enzo. Jersey Shore meets the CBS Lot in Hollywood! A Jersey native, an Italian, whose favorite pastime is bocce ball. Even odds on him being related to Anthony somehow. Or Jeremy, that guy is always at the Bocce club. Has potential to be this year's Memphis, the dude who uses his charm and all around humor (and the awesome fedora) to sneak into the final three.
5. Annie. Two words, gentlemen. Hang on, I'll give you a second to prepare yourself. Ready? (pause ...) She's bisexual. (joel meyers voice) aw sh*t ... Admits in the promo video she'll use her boobs to charm the fellas and the ladies. Really, I'm getting excited just thinking about that. A very compelling reason to get BB After Dark on (jimmy lennon jr voice) Showtime!
4. Brendon. A swim coach. Very, uuh, "pleasing to look at", in the words of the Chenbot. (I can only imagine what she'd say about me. "Steve ... well, Steve is, uuh, he's a, uuh, he's got a great personality, and I am bringing a huge collection of t-shirts for him to wear so I don't have to look at him shirtless anymore". That about sums it up, I think). Anyways, seems like he has a good sense of humor, and he's already pleading for a showmance. "Not a romantic thing, just a girl to break the beds in with". This guy equals ... well, me in my dreams.
3. Matt. A heavily tattooed dude from Illinois. Looked like some sweet designs in the promo video, I might have to pay close attention and get some inspiration for myself. I'm 33 now; the clock's ticking on being able to get inked up without looking like a tool. His hobby is "annoying people for my own amusement". He admits he has "no filter from the brain to the mouth", and claims he's "the smartest contestant this show has ever seen". I'm sure Dr. Will is shaking in his boots at that threat. I'm calling it right now -- G roots for this guy to win.
2. Kristen. A very attractive blonde from Pennsylvania. She wouldn't want to live with a bunch of "Average Joe's", so I guess I'd be sh*t out of luck with her. But a kid can dream. I'm predicting her and Brendon hook up within three days of this thing getting underway.
1. Hayden. A 24 year old college student. After six plus years, on a freaking baseball scholarship to Arizona State, he still hasn't graduated. You gotta admire that. He's also afraid to fly (hey, me too!) Basically, in his promos, he comes across as a guy you'd be honored to have at your tailgate. Infer from that what you will. For now, he's my pony in this race. Now I need to seek out Hammerin' Hank Goldberg to get some odds on this pony crossing the finish line ...
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Thursday, June 24, 2010
my lottery and bucks projections
Its NBA Draft night! Woo!
I will be watching at a Bucks, uuh, watching party. But there might be a live blog pop up at some point, if only to record every genius, smart ass, "he did NOT just go there!" interaction between me, "The Voice of Reason", and whatever nickname Brent wants to give himself.
In the meantime, here's my predictions through the Bucks first round pick at 15, plus the Bucks three second round selections. I'd go deeper than that, but I have work to do today. That, and the World Cup resumes in a few minutes.
1. Washington Wizards.
Biggest Hole: the one Gilbert Arenas nearly blew in teammate Javaris Crittendon? That, or the one between GM Ernie Grunfeld's ears.
Should Pick: John Wall, G, Kentucky. Supposedly the surest thing in the draft.
Will Pick: John Wall, G, Kentucky. He probably is too good to pass up.
2. Philadelphia 76ers.
Biggest Hole: the one in the doughnut Elton Brand is consuming right now.
Should Pick: Derrick Favors, F/C, Georgia Tech. I think he's the best player in this draft.
Will Pick: Evan Turner, F, Ohio State. I am always leery of drafting talent from the Big 10 (plus two). Horrible basketball conference that rarely, if ever, produces talent that delivers on the pro level. Probably because no team in that conference is capable of scoring 60 on an under-12 squad.
3. New Jersey Nets.
Biggest Hole: the one in the ground in Brooklyn, site of the new arena in three years. Can't get built soon enough.
Should Pick: trade down. As a 'Cuse fan, I'm not a big backer of Wes Johnson. Cousins and Monroe's position is already competently filled by Brook Lopez. And its too soon to grab Xavier Henry. So ...
Will Pick: TRADE! Nets move down to seven, picking up the Pistons second rounder (36 overall) and the right to swap future first round picks in 2012 or 2013 that will be lottery protected. Maybe some cash considerations as well. So now on the clock ...
Detroit Pistons.
Biggest Hole: come on, its Detroit. The whole metro area is a (sh*t) hole.
Should Pick: trade up. Which I'm projecting them to do. To draft ...
Will Pick: DeMarcus Cousins, F/C, Kentucky. Right team, perfect fit. Captain Oats approves.
4. Minnesota Timberwolves.
Biggest Hole: debatable, between the idiot GM and incompetent coach. Really, you fire Kevin McHale, fire Flip Saunders, neither of whom I'd trust to walk the dog outside to take a dump ... and you're WORSE as a result? That takes talent!
Should Pick: a point guard? Just kidding. Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown. Allows them to trade Jefferson or Love, get a little breathing room under the cap, and perhaps pursue Rudy Gay to fill their glaring hole at the 2.
Will Pick: Wesley Johnson, F, Syracuse. Again, idiot GM plus incompetent coach equals I'd hate to be a Wolves fan.
5. Sacramento Kings.
Biggest Hole: in the state budget, preventing the Kings from getting a long-overdue and desperately needed new arena.
Should Pick: Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown.
Will Pick: Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown. Like Cousins, right team, perfect fit. This team could steal the eight seed next year, ala OKC this year.
6. Golden State Warriors.
Biggest Hole: where do you begin? The coach is a drunk, the owner is trying to sell, the GM tried to quit only he wasn't allowed to. Good times by the Bay!
Should Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. He would THRIVE in Nelly's run-n-gun system.
Will Pick: Derrick Favors, F, Georgia Tech. Can't believe I slid him this far.
7. New Jersey Nets (via trade from Detroit)
Biggest Hole: getting deeper by the working day. Glad to see a pro team coming back to Mr. Kotter's neighborhood.
Should Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. You trade back projecting he'll be there, and BAMMO! He is!
Will Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. A core of Henry / Harris / Lopez, that's a foundation. And maybe the six seed in the East.
8. LA Clippers.
Biggest Hole: the one in the Clippers budget, paying out fired Coach Dunleavy, fired GM Elgin Baylor, and disgraceful owner Donald Sterling's numerous age and racial and sexual discrimination settlements.
Should Pick: Patrick Patterson, F, Kentucky. Perfect replacement for Marcus Camby, backup if Blake Griffin isn't ready to go come November.
Will Pick: Al-Farouq Aminu, F, Wake Forest. Because they're the Clippers.
9. Utah Jazz.
Biggest Hole: not hiring Mr. William Grigsby to say their name in team promos.
Should Pick: Gordon Hayward, F, Butler. What, a white guy on Utah? No ...
Will Pick: Gordon Hayward, F, Butler. I like this kid. Can definitely fill the hole when Kirilenko leaves in another year.
10. Indiana Pacers.
Biggest Hole: the ones in the strip club Jamaal Tinsley shot up? He hasn't been allowed back since, yet he's still getting paid. You gotta love the League.
Should Pick: trade! The Pacers desperately need a point guard. There's none worth taking here.
Will Pick: TRADE! Pacers slide back to 13 with Toronto, acquiring G Jose Calderon and a lottery protected first round pick, to be acquired no later than 2014. Also toss in some cash considerations and maybe a 2011 second rounder (Toronto doesn't have a 2010 second rounder, the Lakers own it).
Toronto Raptors.
Biggest Hole: the one about to open up when Chris Bosh jumps ship.
Should Pick: trade up. Which I project them to do, to draft ...
Will Pick: Ed Davis, F, North Carolina. I like this kid. Although I worry about drafting forwards from North Carolina in the Great North. The last one sorta, kinda burned every bridge on his way out of town.
11. New Orleans Hornets.
Biggest Hole: the one in the oil rig offshore. Come on, that was too easy.
Should Pick: trade out. Especially if they can move a contract. Hornets are in awful shape tax wise.
Will Pick: Ekpe Udoh, C, Baylor. But I really think they do everything possible to trade here.
12. Memphis Grizzlies.
Biggest Hole: the one in the ground at Graceland. RIP Elvis.
Should Pick: up and move to a new city, preferably with competent ownership.
Will Pick: Cole Aldrich, C, Kansas. Biggest bust of the first round, going to a bust of a franchise. Beautiful.
13. Indiana Pacers (via trade with Toronto).
Biggest Hole: the dent in the scoreboard after the Melee at the Palace? Pacers still haven't recovered from that one.
Should Pick: anyone with even a little bit of integrity and character.
Will Pick: Luke Babbitt, F, Nevada. Not much you can do here, but to emerge with Calderon and the right to the Raptors first rounder sometime in the next few years is a win for this team, no matter who they pick here.
14. Houston Rockets.
Biggest Hole: center, if Yao Ming can't recover from surgery.
Should Pick: Daniel Orton, C, Kentucky. Insurance policy.
Will Pick: Daniel Orton, C, Kentucky. Daryl Morey won't screw this up.
15. YOUR Milwaukee Bucks!!!! (vuvuzelas voice) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Biggest Hole: the one in the Bucks luxury tax budget if Maggette flops. I like the risk here, mainly because in year one, there isn't any. The Bucks save $1.6 million against the cap, almost $2.5 million in room against the luxury tax threshold. Gives them breathing room to enter the MLE market. But if Maggette bombs out, you're taking on nearly $3 million in added salary / tax room next year (and the cap and tax threshold are going to plummet with the new CBA), and you're staring a $12 million plus hit in 2012-2013. Granted, somewhat offset by getting Michael Redd off the books this year, but come 2012-2013, you have to resign BJ, Bogut, and decide on Maggette. This is a risk, albeit a smart, calculated one with far more upside potential than down.
Should Pick: Avery Bradley, G, Texas. Gives you flexibility if Luke Ridnour wants too much money to resign, or if you can't convince Steve man-crush JJ Redick to take an offer from you (yes, I'm delusional. But Redick is absolutely who this team should be targeting with the MLE).
Will Pick: James Anderson, G, Oklahoma State. I'm good with it. Either Bradley or Anderson makes perfect sense in this spot. John Hammond has yet to screw anything up -- even the Joe Alexander gaffe he turned into (1) John Salmons, (2) this pick, and (3) the See Joe Dunk campaign.
Other Bucks Selections:
37:
Should Pick: a foreigner to stash away for a couple years, or a first round projection that's slid. With three of the next eleven picks, they should be able to do both.
Will Pick: Tibor Pliess, C, Germany. Give him a couple grooming years in Europe, and then bring him over as a solid, cheap backup to Andrew Bogut.
44:
Should Pick: best value on the board. Candidates I think have at least a 50/50 shot of still being here include: Darington Hobson (F, New Mexico); grievis vasquez (deuche, Maryland); Stanley Robinson (F, UConn); Luke Harangody (F, Notre Dame); Quincy Poindexter (F, Washington).
Will Pick: Tiny Gallon, F, Oklahoma. A little bit of a headcase, but every team can afford one. You don't want more than one, but if he's talented enough, you chance it with one. The Bucks currently don't have one, and Gallon has freakish talent. Good value pick here.
47:
Should Pick: if only for comedic value via my reaction to the pick, there's only one candidate here.
Will Pick: (adam silver voice) With the forty-seventh pick in the 2010 NBA Draft, the Milwaukee Bucks select ... Jon Scheyer, guard, Duke University. Please, Mr. Hammond, please, please, please make this happen ...
I will be watching at a Bucks, uuh, watching party. But there might be a live blog pop up at some point, if only to record every genius, smart ass, "he did NOT just go there!" interaction between me, "The Voice of Reason", and whatever nickname Brent wants to give himself.
In the meantime, here's my predictions through the Bucks first round pick at 15, plus the Bucks three second round selections. I'd go deeper than that, but I have work to do today. That, and the World Cup resumes in a few minutes.
1. Washington Wizards.
Biggest Hole: the one Gilbert Arenas nearly blew in teammate Javaris Crittendon? That, or the one between GM Ernie Grunfeld's ears.
Should Pick: John Wall, G, Kentucky. Supposedly the surest thing in the draft.
Will Pick: John Wall, G, Kentucky. He probably is too good to pass up.
2. Philadelphia 76ers.
Biggest Hole: the one in the doughnut Elton Brand is consuming right now.
Should Pick: Derrick Favors, F/C, Georgia Tech. I think he's the best player in this draft.
Will Pick: Evan Turner, F, Ohio State. I am always leery of drafting talent from the Big 10 (plus two). Horrible basketball conference that rarely, if ever, produces talent that delivers on the pro level. Probably because no team in that conference is capable of scoring 60 on an under-12 squad.
3. New Jersey Nets.
Biggest Hole: the one in the ground in Brooklyn, site of the new arena in three years. Can't get built soon enough.
Should Pick: trade down. As a 'Cuse fan, I'm not a big backer of Wes Johnson. Cousins and Monroe's position is already competently filled by Brook Lopez. And its too soon to grab Xavier Henry. So ...
Will Pick: TRADE! Nets move down to seven, picking up the Pistons second rounder (36 overall) and the right to swap future first round picks in 2012 or 2013 that will be lottery protected. Maybe some cash considerations as well. So now on the clock ...
Detroit Pistons.
Biggest Hole: come on, its Detroit. The whole metro area is a (sh*t) hole.
Should Pick: trade up. Which I'm projecting them to do. To draft ...
Will Pick: DeMarcus Cousins, F/C, Kentucky. Right team, perfect fit. Captain Oats approves.
4. Minnesota Timberwolves.
Biggest Hole: debatable, between the idiot GM and incompetent coach. Really, you fire Kevin McHale, fire Flip Saunders, neither of whom I'd trust to walk the dog outside to take a dump ... and you're WORSE as a result? That takes talent!
Should Pick: a point guard? Just kidding. Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown. Allows them to trade Jefferson or Love, get a little breathing room under the cap, and perhaps pursue Rudy Gay to fill their glaring hole at the 2.
Will Pick: Wesley Johnson, F, Syracuse. Again, idiot GM plus incompetent coach equals I'd hate to be a Wolves fan.
5. Sacramento Kings.
Biggest Hole: in the state budget, preventing the Kings from getting a long-overdue and desperately needed new arena.
Should Pick: Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown.
Will Pick: Greg Monroe, C, Georgetown. Like Cousins, right team, perfect fit. This team could steal the eight seed next year, ala OKC this year.
6. Golden State Warriors.
Biggest Hole: where do you begin? The coach is a drunk, the owner is trying to sell, the GM tried to quit only he wasn't allowed to. Good times by the Bay!
Should Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. He would THRIVE in Nelly's run-n-gun system.
Will Pick: Derrick Favors, F, Georgia Tech. Can't believe I slid him this far.
7. New Jersey Nets (via trade from Detroit)
Biggest Hole: getting deeper by the working day. Glad to see a pro team coming back to Mr. Kotter's neighborhood.
Should Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. You trade back projecting he'll be there, and BAMMO! He is!
Will Pick: Xavier Henry, G/F, Kansas. A core of Henry / Harris / Lopez, that's a foundation. And maybe the six seed in the East.
8. LA Clippers.
Biggest Hole: the one in the Clippers budget, paying out fired Coach Dunleavy, fired GM Elgin Baylor, and disgraceful owner Donald Sterling's numerous age and racial and sexual discrimination settlements.
Should Pick: Patrick Patterson, F, Kentucky. Perfect replacement for Marcus Camby, backup if Blake Griffin isn't ready to go come November.
Will Pick: Al-Farouq Aminu, F, Wake Forest. Because they're the Clippers.
9. Utah Jazz.
Biggest Hole: not hiring Mr. William Grigsby to say their name in team promos.
Should Pick: Gordon Hayward, F, Butler. What, a white guy on Utah? No ...
Will Pick: Gordon Hayward, F, Butler. I like this kid. Can definitely fill the hole when Kirilenko leaves in another year.
10. Indiana Pacers.
Biggest Hole: the ones in the strip club Jamaal Tinsley shot up? He hasn't been allowed back since, yet he's still getting paid. You gotta love the League.
Should Pick: trade! The Pacers desperately need a point guard. There's none worth taking here.
Will Pick: TRADE! Pacers slide back to 13 with Toronto, acquiring G Jose Calderon and a lottery protected first round pick, to be acquired no later than 2014. Also toss in some cash considerations and maybe a 2011 second rounder (Toronto doesn't have a 2010 second rounder, the Lakers own it).
Toronto Raptors.
Biggest Hole: the one about to open up when Chris Bosh jumps ship.
Should Pick: trade up. Which I project them to do, to draft ...
Will Pick: Ed Davis, F, North Carolina. I like this kid. Although I worry about drafting forwards from North Carolina in the Great North. The last one sorta, kinda burned every bridge on his way out of town.
11. New Orleans Hornets.
Biggest Hole: the one in the oil rig offshore. Come on, that was too easy.
Should Pick: trade out. Especially if they can move a contract. Hornets are in awful shape tax wise.
Will Pick: Ekpe Udoh, C, Baylor. But I really think they do everything possible to trade here.
12. Memphis Grizzlies.
Biggest Hole: the one in the ground at Graceland. RIP Elvis.
Should Pick: up and move to a new city, preferably with competent ownership.
Will Pick: Cole Aldrich, C, Kansas. Biggest bust of the first round, going to a bust of a franchise. Beautiful.
13. Indiana Pacers (via trade with Toronto).
Biggest Hole: the dent in the scoreboard after the Melee at the Palace? Pacers still haven't recovered from that one.
Should Pick: anyone with even a little bit of integrity and character.
Will Pick: Luke Babbitt, F, Nevada. Not much you can do here, but to emerge with Calderon and the right to the Raptors first rounder sometime in the next few years is a win for this team, no matter who they pick here.
14. Houston Rockets.
Biggest Hole: center, if Yao Ming can't recover from surgery.
Should Pick: Daniel Orton, C, Kentucky. Insurance policy.
Will Pick: Daniel Orton, C, Kentucky. Daryl Morey won't screw this up.
15. YOUR Milwaukee Bucks!!!! (vuvuzelas voice) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Biggest Hole: the one in the Bucks luxury tax budget if Maggette flops. I like the risk here, mainly because in year one, there isn't any. The Bucks save $1.6 million against the cap, almost $2.5 million in room against the luxury tax threshold. Gives them breathing room to enter the MLE market. But if Maggette bombs out, you're taking on nearly $3 million in added salary / tax room next year (and the cap and tax threshold are going to plummet with the new CBA), and you're staring a $12 million plus hit in 2012-2013. Granted, somewhat offset by getting Michael Redd off the books this year, but come 2012-2013, you have to resign BJ, Bogut, and decide on Maggette. This is a risk, albeit a smart, calculated one with far more upside potential than down.
Should Pick: Avery Bradley, G, Texas. Gives you flexibility if Luke Ridnour wants too much money to resign, or if you can't convince Steve man-crush JJ Redick to take an offer from you (yes, I'm delusional. But Redick is absolutely who this team should be targeting with the MLE).
Will Pick: James Anderson, G, Oklahoma State. I'm good with it. Either Bradley or Anderson makes perfect sense in this spot. John Hammond has yet to screw anything up -- even the Joe Alexander gaffe he turned into (1) John Salmons, (2) this pick, and (3) the See Joe Dunk campaign.
Other Bucks Selections:
37:
Should Pick: a foreigner to stash away for a couple years, or a first round projection that's slid. With three of the next eleven picks, they should be able to do both.
Will Pick: Tibor Pliess, C, Germany. Give him a couple grooming years in Europe, and then bring him over as a solid, cheap backup to Andrew Bogut.
44:
Should Pick: best value on the board. Candidates I think have at least a 50/50 shot of still being here include: Darington Hobson (F, New Mexico); grievis vasquez (deuche, Maryland); Stanley Robinson (F, UConn); Luke Harangody (F, Notre Dame); Quincy Poindexter (F, Washington).
Will Pick: Tiny Gallon, F, Oklahoma. A little bit of a headcase, but every team can afford one. You don't want more than one, but if he's talented enough, you chance it with one. The Bucks currently don't have one, and Gallon has freakish talent. Good value pick here.
47:
Should Pick: if only for comedic value via my reaction to the pick, there's only one candidate here.
Will Pick: (adam silver voice) With the forty-seventh pick in the 2010 NBA Draft, the Milwaukee Bucks select ... Jon Scheyer, guard, Duke University. Please, Mr. Hammond, please, please, please make this happen ...
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
we got next! wait. what?!?!
"Howard, gratefully claims it. Distribution, brilliant. Landon Donovan ... there's things going on here for USA. Can they do it here? Cross ... and Dempsey is denied again ... BUT DONOVAN HAS SCORED! OH CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS! GOAL GOAL! USA! Certainly through (to the knockout round)! Oh its incredible! You could not write a script like this!"
-- Ian Darke, on the call of the most sweetest moment of the World Cup so far.
------------------------------
After spending the first two US World Cup matches watching with the biggest soccer fan I know ... and seeing the US fail to win (let alone ever lead) either match, I made a crucial decision for today's must-win game against Algeria.
I saved the vacation day, and watched it at work.
Gotta be honest ... I wish I'd watched this one with DJ. Because at least I could have calmed the nerves with some vodka.
(Scratch that -- a LOT of vodka).
Holy Jesus.
For 91 some odd pain-staking, heart-attack inducing, "I've got more gray hair than my dad now" moments, Team USA could do just about everything right ... except score. (Well, actually, they did, Clint Dempsey in the 21st minute, but more shady officiating took that one off the board).
(they had that many shots, and only one went in?!?! graphic: espn.com)
And then, with the clock running down, with the England / Slovenia score going final, knowing it was score in however much extra time was left, or season over ... with me in a state of panic and confirming that yes, we do have a defibrillator on the fourth floor ... Tim Howard scoops up a solid shot against the post. Flings it to midfield, landing perfectly in front of Landon Donovan's right foot.
(Gotta be honest: at that moment, when that ball dropped PERFECTLY in stride with Donovan, I had flashbacks to Romo's overtime pass to Miles Austin to beat the Chiefs here at Arrowhead back in October. That one unfolded right in front of me. You couldn't do anything but just shake your head in horror. It was so perfectly run, there was no way it would fail. That "pass" by Tim Howard, I had flashbacks, we'll put it that way. Except this time, I wasn't screaming in horror. Or storming out of the stadium, grabbing a bottle of vodka, and refusing to talk to anyone for an hour afterwards. Which is a good thing, I think. Anyways).
Donovan takes off, streaking down the right sideline. He passes off to DaMarcus Beasley (a brilliant final ten minute sub by Bradley, a coach rapidly climbing the Steve's Favorite Coaches list), who passes off to Dempsey, who sticks it ... right off the goalie. Who can't handle it. And sees it trickle into the middle of the box ...
Perfectly back onto Landon Donovan's right foot.
Cue the celebration.
If you didn't watch the game ... please, watch the replay. You HAVE to see this game from start to finish to understand just how awesome Donovan's winning goal was. You have to sit through Algeria hitting the crossbar not even six minutes in (and threatening to take control instantly, just like England and Slovenia did). You have to sit through the BS overturn of Dempsey's goal. Altidore's incredible brain fart miss from two feet with noone between him and the net. Bocanegra's game-saving unreal slide and clear in the 63rd minute. Another Dempsey point blank miss in the 57th minute. Bradley's awesome try on a direct kick in the 78th minute. To sit through the frustration, the utter frustration, the impending sense of "f*ck it, we're done" ...
And then end it with the biggest goal in US Soccer history.
And to think people ask me why I'm somewhat obsessed with sports. Really?
That was sweet stuff. I mean, I sweated through the polo shirt, bit off every finger nail, actually did ask our floor safety monitor if we have a defibrillator on this floor (we do!), and have no doubt there's a lot more gray hair up top than there was before this match started.
And I can't wait to get home and relive this whole game again.
Bring on Ghana!
(Saturday, 1:30pm CT. I'll be poolside. Feel free to join in ...)
-- Ian Darke, on the call of the most sweetest moment of the World Cup so far.
------------------------------
After spending the first two US World Cup matches watching with the biggest soccer fan I know ... and seeing the US fail to win (let alone ever lead) either match, I made a crucial decision for today's must-win game against Algeria.
I saved the vacation day, and watched it at work.
Gotta be honest ... I wish I'd watched this one with DJ. Because at least I could have calmed the nerves with some vodka.
(Scratch that -- a LOT of vodka).
Holy Jesus.
For 91 some odd pain-staking, heart-attack inducing, "I've got more gray hair than my dad now" moments, Team USA could do just about everything right ... except score. (Well, actually, they did, Clint Dempsey in the 21st minute, but more shady officiating took that one off the board).
(they had that many shots, and only one went in?!?! graphic: espn.com)
And then, with the clock running down, with the England / Slovenia score going final, knowing it was score in however much extra time was left, or season over ... with me in a state of panic and confirming that yes, we do have a defibrillator on the fourth floor ... Tim Howard scoops up a solid shot against the post. Flings it to midfield, landing perfectly in front of Landon Donovan's right foot.
(Gotta be honest: at that moment, when that ball dropped PERFECTLY in stride with Donovan, I had flashbacks to Romo's overtime pass to Miles Austin to beat the Chiefs here at Arrowhead back in October. That one unfolded right in front of me. You couldn't do anything but just shake your head in horror. It was so perfectly run, there was no way it would fail. That "pass" by Tim Howard, I had flashbacks, we'll put it that way. Except this time, I wasn't screaming in horror. Or storming out of the stadium, grabbing a bottle of vodka, and refusing to talk to anyone for an hour afterwards. Which is a good thing, I think. Anyways).
Donovan takes off, streaking down the right sideline. He passes off to DaMarcus Beasley (a brilliant final ten minute sub by Bradley, a coach rapidly climbing the Steve's Favorite Coaches list), who passes off to Dempsey, who sticks it ... right off the goalie. Who can't handle it. And sees it trickle into the middle of the box ...
Perfectly back onto Landon Donovan's right foot.
Cue the celebration.
If you didn't watch the game ... please, watch the replay. You HAVE to see this game from start to finish to understand just how awesome Donovan's winning goal was. You have to sit through Algeria hitting the crossbar not even six minutes in (and threatening to take control instantly, just like England and Slovenia did). You have to sit through the BS overturn of Dempsey's goal. Altidore's incredible brain fart miss from two feet with noone between him and the net. Bocanegra's game-saving unreal slide and clear in the 63rd minute. Another Dempsey point blank miss in the 57th minute. Bradley's awesome try on a direct kick in the 78th minute. To sit through the frustration, the utter frustration, the impending sense of "f*ck it, we're done" ...
And then end it with the biggest goal in US Soccer history.
And to think people ask me why I'm somewhat obsessed with sports. Really?
That was sweet stuff. I mean, I sweated through the polo shirt, bit off every finger nail, actually did ask our floor safety monitor if we have a defibrillator on this floor (we do!), and have no doubt there's a lot more gray hair up top than there was before this match started.
And I can't wait to get home and relive this whole game again.
Bring on Ghana!
(Saturday, 1:30pm CT. I'll be poolside. Feel free to join in ...)
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
the big xii's next (logical?) step
"I wasn't looking for true love,
But now you're looking at me --
You're the only one I can think of,
You're the only one I see ...
All I Need! Is just a little more time,
To be sure, what I feel,
Isn't all in my mind.
'Cause it seems so hard to believe
That you're all I need ..."
-- "All I Need" by the Greatness that is Jack Wagner. Yes, THAT Jack Wagner. You have to love the 1980s, when soap opera and movie stars had major top 5, top 10 smash hits. Rick Springfield, Eddie Murphy, even Don Johnson for crying out loud. Now, we get Justin Bieber. Give me Dr. Peter Burns, thank you, and a side order of his lovely wife Amanda Woodward to go ...
---------------------------------------------------
In the end, Texas got what it wanted.
No surprise there. Texas tends to get what Texas wants. It wanted to get rid of the only credible threat in the North to its dominance. Done, via a ridiculous and absolutely insane ultimatum delivered to Nebraska last week that drove the Big Red Machine to the Big Ten (plus two). It wanted to continue to skewer the revenue sharing imbalance, by being allowed to form its own television network free from outside interference of the mean conference commissioner. Wish granted.
And let me be up front about this. There is NO WAY Texas was ever seriously contemplating leaving. DeLoss Dodds played this BRILLIANTLY. Jesus, I wish I had just 1/100th of his level of intelligence. I honestly just want to meet the man, shake his hand, and just soak in his brilliance for five seconds.
(Side note: Lew Perkins? THIS is how you run a successful BCS program. You don't f*ck your loyal fanbase, you f*ck your opponents. That's why DeLoss Dodds, a Kansas State grad ironically, that's why Mr. Dodds' team essentially runs the Big XII, and you're being forced into retirement. Well there's that, and the fact that you're an arrogant corrupt d*ck who's getting what he deserves. But that's a rant for another post).
With one strategically timed memo, Mr. Dodds destroyed the conference championship game (currently impossible to stage due to fewer than twelve teams) that nearly cost his team a shot at the 2009 BCS Championship. (And did cost his team a shot at the 2001 BCS Championship). He ensured UT now only has to beat one credible foe to reach the BCS Championship Game every season (OU at the Cotton Bowl). He raised UT's hoops viability by driving out the two "weak links" in the hoops world of the conference. (Neither Nebraska nor Colorado have made the NCAA tournament in the last decade, the only two Big XII schools that is true for).
And did I mention that he ensured UT's continued dominance by getting the other nine schools to allow him to form his own television network, free from their interference?
This, Kansas fans? This, Missouri fans? This, KSU or Iowa State or even A&M or Oklahoma fans, THIS is what we're so grateful to see survive?
Actually ... yes. Provided the next step is to replace Nebraska with an even bigger name, and a weaker on-field product.
Notre Dame.
The devil is in the details. Specifically, the financial details.
(Cue the Crazy Steve Theory of the Day!)
I've spent the better part of the day figuring out how in the hell Commissioner Beebe arrived at his revenue figures. Yes, simply removing two schools from the equation and keeping the revenue streams the same, means more money per school, about $3-$3.5 million per year. Which brings UT up to nearly $17 million, which is what the Pac 10 offered. And all things being equal (aka same revenue received no matter which conference they were in), I do believe UT AD Dodds when he says that they "preferred to stay in the Big XII".
(OF COURSE he did -- because he'd run off the only credible threat to Texas Football in the northern half of the conference!)
But -- and here's why I think there's more to come -- SOMETHING has to push the revenue projections from $17 million to $25 million in the next couple years for Texas. Yes, the UT(ry to F*ck With Us! We Dare You!) Network, or whatever the hell they call this coming enterprise, that'll close some of the gap.
But outside of the Lone Star State, and maybe Oklahoma, what cable and/or satellite provider is going to put that channel on its basic tier? Do you see Comcast (based in Philadelphia) doing that? Time Warner won't even put America's Favorite Sport's official channel on its basic tier for Christ's sake (the NFL Network -- channel 212 on DirecTV, channel 669 on Everest, channel "not available" on Time Warner. F*ck you, TW! F*ck you ...).
What makes you think they're gonna put such award-winning documentaries as "From Chris Simms to Major Applewhite to James Brown to Peter Gaudere to Shea Morenz: How Sh*tty Overhyped QBs Cost UT Multiple National Titles" on channel 33? Or such inspring replays as "UCLA 66, Texas 3: Mackovic's Final Stand" on channel 59?
(A game I was at by the way, in September 1997. Check out the boxscore -- it was 38-0 at the half! UCLA scored on its first six possessions! 45-0 before UT scored! In Austin! An 0-2 Pac 10 also-ran up 40, at halftime, against the two-time defending Big XII / Southwest Conference champs! Unreal. I should also note, this game gave rise to one of my favorite swear phrases, yet another phrase I (think) I stole from my old college roommate: "God F*cking Dammit!" I don't recall using that blast before this debacle, but I've certainly used it plenty of times since ...)
Or such insightful pieces as "Kevin Durant, DJ Augustin, Damion James Reflect on Rick Barnes, the only Coach in America Who Could Possibly Lose in Round One with Them on the Roster!" That's got Emmy written all over it! Or my personal favorite: "Bevo: Its What for Dinner!", and then you could have the SI Tailgate Guy go around to various tailgates at Big XII (minus two) campuses showing how they prepare and cook bull for their main course. On second thought, I think at least the local Lawrence channel on Sunflower Cablevision would pick up that one ...
The point is, if the "current status quo" is what we have going forward, this league is going to make Major League Baseball look fair, equitable, and balanced within two years. And NOBODY in their right mind believes even half of all MLB teams have any shot of contention entering the season due to their revenue sharing issues.
The only way this works ... is if there's a bigger name than Nebraska coming on board. The criteria for this newest addition is obvious:
* Midwestern school (to keep travel budgets limited).
* Well recognized name (to ensure national television interest).
* Delivers major media market (to ensure larger TV deal in 2012).
* Competitive, but not overly competitive, in football (to ensure UT, OU, A&M dominance).
* Decently competitive at other sports (to ensure no Nebraska or Colorado like RPI drags that cost NCAA berths).
The criteria lead to two logical conclusions.
The first being TCU. It gives you an added presence in Dallas. They're a legitimate top 10 school in football ... but does anyone really believe they could roll into Austin and win every other year? Or Norman for that matter? (Wait, they did do that the last time they played OU in 2005. OU promptly cancelled the return engagement in Fort Worth. Stay classy Bob Stoops. Stay classy). They're a natural fit in the South, if you split up OU and Texas to ensure they could meet with a national title berth on the line in early December (which needs to happen regardless -- I called for this exact thing to happen last November in a fake mailbag, actually).
But TCU is NOT a bigger name than Nebraska. Hell, most folks across the country probably have no idea what TCU stands for. (Trust me, its misnamed. Which is great -- parents think "hey, this is a Christian school, our kids will behave!", while students can get away with a ton of sh*t. Its the best of both worlds. Wait, in case my folks are reading this, I swear -- I did not drink while underage, smoke illegal tobacco-like products, purchase Durex and/or Trojans on your MasterCard, skip class on sunny 80 degree November afternoons, or blow off a final to play that 007 Bond game. I also never called a sleazy professor a "f*cking c*nt" to her face, a screw-up that nearly cost me graduating on time. Let's keep the "our kid was great in school!" facade intact, deal? Deal. Moving on.)
Which means the North addition needs to be the "grand slam". The "sexy attraction". (Not that TCU folks aren't sexy and/or attractive. Come on. We gave the nation Sandy Duncan, Rod Roddy, Chris Klein, LaDainian Tomlinson, and of course, me! What isn't crazy sexy hot about me!)
And the obvious candidate ... is Notre Dame.
Think of the coup that would be. You ensure OU vs Notre Dame every year. Notre Dame vs Texas two out of every four years, and vs A&M the other two years. You add a NCAA caliber basketball program, both men's and women's. You add national prestige. You have (at the very least) ABC / ESPN and FOX Sports willing to pay to renew your television contract.
And best of all, you tap into THE untapped market for the Big XII, while at the same time raising two gigantic middle fingers, screaming "F*ck You", and dropping a deuce in the Big Ten (plus two)'s front lawn. You turn the tables on those sleazeballs. "You wanna steal one of our football powers? Fine. We'll give you Nebraska, and raise you a Notre Dame!".
Now, I know the obvious response is, "Wait Stevo. If Notre Dame won't join the Big Ten (plus two), what in the hell makes you think they'll join the Big XII (minus two)?" A fair question. Go back to the sixth and seventh sentences in this post. Because the Big XII (minus two) powers that be can grant Notre Dame something that no other conference can offer.
The Notre Dame Television Network.
The sole reason Notre Dame has remained independent in football is because of the NBC contract (which expires in 2014). Why wouldn't the Big XII take the $20 million in revenues that Colorado and Nebraska are forfeiting after this year, fly to South Bend, and say "look it, if you join us, we'll guarantee you at least 3 of your 12 games are on in prime time, either on ABC or ESPN as the national broadcast -- against Texas or A&M, against OU, and against USC. If you join us, you see this $20 million in unmarked bills across the table from you? That's the revenue we didn't give Colorado and Nebraska this year. We're giving it to you to start up your own television network. That's right, the Notre Dame Network. We don't care what you put on there -- its your channel. We promise you, the Big XII Office won't dictate one thing regarding that channel to you. And, as an added bonus, if you'll say "yes" to our offer of membership ... we'll underwrite the start-up costs to get your network on in every major media market in the Central time zone. We already share revenue based on number of televised appearances, so we can guarantee you at least a 50% increase in rights fees alone. To say nothing of the cash you'll be raking in, both interference-free and required-to-share-the-revenue free, with your new TV network, that, again, at a bare minimum, we will guarantee a spot on the basic tier for in Houston, Dallas/Fort Worth, St. Louis, Chicago, and Kansas City, all top 30 Nielsen markets. And you can be damned sure those won't be the only top 30 markets clamoring for your channel when we're done paying off cable and satellite providers all across the continental United States. All you have to do is say "yes" to our bribe ... I mean, our offer, and become the XIIth member of our "new" conference."
How in the hell could Notre Dame POSSIBLY turn that down?
So to summarize: I'm ok with the Big XII basically hitting its knees and fellating UT, OU and A&M. I'm perfectly fine with screwing over the original Big 8 schools at the benefit of the Southworst Four. Provided there's another domino to fall. And that domino is Notre Dame.
If there's one thing that DeLoss Dodds is not, its stupid. The man has shown the past two weeks he's without question THE smartest man in collegiate athletics today, if not ever. He played the Big XII like a government mule, using and abusing it until it had nothing left to offer him, before backing off just enough to let the thing live. He drove off his only real rival to conference dominance. He did it knowing damned well he wasn't leaving the cash cow that is the Big XII, yet threatening to do so, conning the other schools into giving him even more of the revenue pie. He beat the mule, and got his 40 acre to boot. Job well done. Provided Notre Dame is the replacement for what's left.
Because the only thing better than adding a nationally recognized school with a huge following, is adding one that isn't a credible championship threat in any major sport ...
But now you're looking at me --
You're the only one I can think of,
You're the only one I see ...
All I Need! Is just a little more time,
To be sure, what I feel,
Isn't all in my mind.
'Cause it seems so hard to believe
That you're all I need ..."
-- "All I Need" by the Greatness that is Jack Wagner. Yes, THAT Jack Wagner. You have to love the 1980s, when soap opera and movie stars had major top 5, top 10 smash hits. Rick Springfield, Eddie Murphy, even Don Johnson for crying out loud. Now, we get Justin Bieber. Give me Dr. Peter Burns, thank you, and a side order of his lovely wife Amanda Woodward to go ...
---------------------------------------------------
In the end, Texas got what it wanted.
No surprise there. Texas tends to get what Texas wants. It wanted to get rid of the only credible threat in the North to its dominance. Done, via a ridiculous and absolutely insane ultimatum delivered to Nebraska last week that drove the Big Red Machine to the Big Ten (plus two). It wanted to continue to skewer the revenue sharing imbalance, by being allowed to form its own television network free from outside interference of the mean conference commissioner. Wish granted.
And let me be up front about this. There is NO WAY Texas was ever seriously contemplating leaving. DeLoss Dodds played this BRILLIANTLY. Jesus, I wish I had just 1/100th of his level of intelligence. I honestly just want to meet the man, shake his hand, and just soak in his brilliance for five seconds.
(Side note: Lew Perkins? THIS is how you run a successful BCS program. You don't f*ck your loyal fanbase, you f*ck your opponents. That's why DeLoss Dodds, a Kansas State grad ironically, that's why Mr. Dodds' team essentially runs the Big XII, and you're being forced into retirement. Well there's that, and the fact that you're an arrogant corrupt d*ck who's getting what he deserves. But that's a rant for another post).
With one strategically timed memo, Mr. Dodds destroyed the conference championship game (currently impossible to stage due to fewer than twelve teams) that nearly cost his team a shot at the 2009 BCS Championship. (And did cost his team a shot at the 2001 BCS Championship). He ensured UT now only has to beat one credible foe to reach the BCS Championship Game every season (OU at the Cotton Bowl). He raised UT's hoops viability by driving out the two "weak links" in the hoops world of the conference. (Neither Nebraska nor Colorado have made the NCAA tournament in the last decade, the only two Big XII schools that is true for).
And did I mention that he ensured UT's continued dominance by getting the other nine schools to allow him to form his own television network, free from their interference?
This, Kansas fans? This, Missouri fans? This, KSU or Iowa State or even A&M or Oklahoma fans, THIS is what we're so grateful to see survive?
Actually ... yes. Provided the next step is to replace Nebraska with an even bigger name, and a weaker on-field product.
Notre Dame.
The devil is in the details. Specifically, the financial details.
(Cue the Crazy Steve Theory of the Day!)
I've spent the better part of the day figuring out how in the hell Commissioner Beebe arrived at his revenue figures. Yes, simply removing two schools from the equation and keeping the revenue streams the same, means more money per school, about $3-$3.5 million per year. Which brings UT up to nearly $17 million, which is what the Pac 10 offered. And all things being equal (aka same revenue received no matter which conference they were in), I do believe UT AD Dodds when he says that they "preferred to stay in the Big XII".
(OF COURSE he did -- because he'd run off the only credible threat to Texas Football in the northern half of the conference!)
But -- and here's why I think there's more to come -- SOMETHING has to push the revenue projections from $17 million to $25 million in the next couple years for Texas. Yes, the UT(ry to F*ck With Us! We Dare You!) Network, or whatever the hell they call this coming enterprise, that'll close some of the gap.
But outside of the Lone Star State, and maybe Oklahoma, what cable and/or satellite provider is going to put that channel on its basic tier? Do you see Comcast (based in Philadelphia) doing that? Time Warner won't even put America's Favorite Sport's official channel on its basic tier for Christ's sake (the NFL Network -- channel 212 on DirecTV, channel 669 on Everest, channel "not available" on Time Warner. F*ck you, TW! F*ck you ...).
What makes you think they're gonna put such award-winning documentaries as "From Chris Simms to Major Applewhite to James Brown to Peter Gaudere to Shea Morenz: How Sh*tty Overhyped QBs Cost UT Multiple National Titles" on channel 33? Or such inspring replays as "UCLA 66, Texas 3: Mackovic's Final Stand" on channel 59?
(A game I was at by the way, in September 1997. Check out the boxscore -- it was 38-0 at the half! UCLA scored on its first six possessions! 45-0 before UT scored! In Austin! An 0-2 Pac 10 also-ran up 40, at halftime, against the two-time defending Big XII / Southwest Conference champs! Unreal. I should also note, this game gave rise to one of my favorite swear phrases, yet another phrase I (think) I stole from my old college roommate: "God F*cking Dammit!" I don't recall using that blast before this debacle, but I've certainly used it plenty of times since ...)
Or such insightful pieces as "Kevin Durant, DJ Augustin, Damion James Reflect on Rick Barnes, the only Coach in America Who Could Possibly Lose in Round One with Them on the Roster!" That's got Emmy written all over it! Or my personal favorite: "Bevo: Its What for Dinner!", and then you could have the SI Tailgate Guy go around to various tailgates at Big XII (minus two) campuses showing how they prepare and cook bull for their main course. On second thought, I think at least the local Lawrence channel on Sunflower Cablevision would pick up that one ...
The point is, if the "current status quo" is what we have going forward, this league is going to make Major League Baseball look fair, equitable, and balanced within two years. And NOBODY in their right mind believes even half of all MLB teams have any shot of contention entering the season due to their revenue sharing issues.
The only way this works ... is if there's a bigger name than Nebraska coming on board. The criteria for this newest addition is obvious:
* Midwestern school (to keep travel budgets limited).
* Well recognized name (to ensure national television interest).
* Delivers major media market (to ensure larger TV deal in 2012).
* Competitive, but not overly competitive, in football (to ensure UT, OU, A&M dominance).
* Decently competitive at other sports (to ensure no Nebraska or Colorado like RPI drags that cost NCAA berths).
The criteria lead to two logical conclusions.
The first being TCU. It gives you an added presence in Dallas. They're a legitimate top 10 school in football ... but does anyone really believe they could roll into Austin and win every other year? Or Norman for that matter? (Wait, they did do that the last time they played OU in 2005. OU promptly cancelled the return engagement in Fort Worth. Stay classy Bob Stoops. Stay classy). They're a natural fit in the South, if you split up OU and Texas to ensure they could meet with a national title berth on the line in early December (which needs to happen regardless -- I called for this exact thing to happen last November in a fake mailbag, actually).
But TCU is NOT a bigger name than Nebraska. Hell, most folks across the country probably have no idea what TCU stands for. (Trust me, its misnamed. Which is great -- parents think "hey, this is a Christian school, our kids will behave!", while students can get away with a ton of sh*t. Its the best of both worlds. Wait, in case my folks are reading this, I swear -- I did not drink while underage, smoke illegal tobacco-like products, purchase Durex and/or Trojans on your MasterCard, skip class on sunny 80 degree November afternoons, or blow off a final to play that 007 Bond game. I also never called a sleazy professor a "f*cking c*nt" to her face, a screw-up that nearly cost me graduating on time. Let's keep the "our kid was great in school!" facade intact, deal? Deal. Moving on.)
Which means the North addition needs to be the "grand slam". The "sexy attraction". (Not that TCU folks aren't sexy and/or attractive. Come on. We gave the nation Sandy Duncan, Rod Roddy, Chris Klein, LaDainian Tomlinson, and of course, me! What isn't crazy sexy hot about me!)
And the obvious candidate ... is Notre Dame.
Think of the coup that would be. You ensure OU vs Notre Dame every year. Notre Dame vs Texas two out of every four years, and vs A&M the other two years. You add a NCAA caliber basketball program, both men's and women's. You add national prestige. You have (at the very least) ABC / ESPN and FOX Sports willing to pay to renew your television contract.
And best of all, you tap into THE untapped market for the Big XII, while at the same time raising two gigantic middle fingers, screaming "F*ck You", and dropping a deuce in the Big Ten (plus two)'s front lawn. You turn the tables on those sleazeballs. "You wanna steal one of our football powers? Fine. We'll give you Nebraska, and raise you a Notre Dame!".
Now, I know the obvious response is, "Wait Stevo. If Notre Dame won't join the Big Ten (plus two), what in the hell makes you think they'll join the Big XII (minus two)?" A fair question. Go back to the sixth and seventh sentences in this post. Because the Big XII (minus two) powers that be can grant Notre Dame something that no other conference can offer.
The Notre Dame Television Network.
The sole reason Notre Dame has remained independent in football is because of the NBC contract (which expires in 2014). Why wouldn't the Big XII take the $20 million in revenues that Colorado and Nebraska are forfeiting after this year, fly to South Bend, and say "look it, if you join us, we'll guarantee you at least 3 of your 12 games are on in prime time, either on ABC or ESPN as the national broadcast -- against Texas or A&M, against OU, and against USC. If you join us, you see this $20 million in unmarked bills across the table from you? That's the revenue we didn't give Colorado and Nebraska this year. We're giving it to you to start up your own television network. That's right, the Notre Dame Network. We don't care what you put on there -- its your channel. We promise you, the Big XII Office won't dictate one thing regarding that channel to you. And, as an added bonus, if you'll say "yes" to our offer of membership ... we'll underwrite the start-up costs to get your network on in every major media market in the Central time zone. We already share revenue based on number of televised appearances, so we can guarantee you at least a 50% increase in rights fees alone. To say nothing of the cash you'll be raking in, both interference-free and required-to-share-the-revenue free, with your new TV network, that, again, at a bare minimum, we will guarantee a spot on the basic tier for in Houston, Dallas/Fort Worth, St. Louis, Chicago, and Kansas City, all top 30 Nielsen markets. And you can be damned sure those won't be the only top 30 markets clamoring for your channel when we're done paying off cable and satellite providers all across the continental United States. All you have to do is say "yes" to our bribe ... I mean, our offer, and become the XIIth member of our "new" conference."
How in the hell could Notre Dame POSSIBLY turn that down?
So to summarize: I'm ok with the Big XII basically hitting its knees and fellating UT, OU and A&M. I'm perfectly fine with screwing over the original Big 8 schools at the benefit of the Southworst Four. Provided there's another domino to fall. And that domino is Notre Dame.
If there's one thing that DeLoss Dodds is not, its stupid. The man has shown the past two weeks he's without question THE smartest man in collegiate athletics today, if not ever. He played the Big XII like a government mule, using and abusing it until it had nothing left to offer him, before backing off just enough to let the thing live. He drove off his only real rival to conference dominance. He did it knowing damned well he wasn't leaving the cash cow that is the Big XII, yet threatening to do so, conning the other schools into giving him even more of the revenue pie. He beat the mule, and got his 40 acre to boot. Job well done. Provided Notre Dame is the replacement for what's left.
Because the only thing better than adding a nationally recognized school with a huge following, is adding one that isn't a credible championship threat in any major sport ...
Monday, June 14, 2010
a quick preview ...
of what I think keeps the Big XII intact.
And no. Its not Texas.
Its not A&M. Or Oklahoma. Or that red-headed stepchild of a State school down there. (Like the red-headed stepchild of a school in Kansas).
The ONLY way keeping the Big XII together in ANY current semblance, the ONLY way this makes sense ...
Is if Notre Dame is on the horizon.
Football drives everything in the NCAA. The Big XII currently cannot stage a conference title game, due to ten teams. The North lost the two teams most responsible for its, uuh, alleged "success" the last fifteen years.
You can move OU to the North, fine. That only makes sense if TCU is plucked to move to the South. (A move I fully expect to happen shortly).
So you still need one more to go title-gaming.
Why NOT Notre Dame?
The "bribe" today to hold the conference together gives Texas the right to form its own TV network. Like Notre Dame wouldn't take that offer? I can hear it now:
(big xii dude) yeah, you join our league ... you can form your own network! NBC can't possibly match that revenue just on football rights alone!
(notre dame dude) sweet! where do i sign!
I've been called crazy, I've been called nuts, I've been called "destined for Two Rivers Psychiatric Ward on 51st and Raytown Road". But on this, on THIS ... I think I'm 100% Psychic.
Notre Dame is coming to the Big XII. Along with my alma mater.
Its the ONLY way today's conference "saving" makes sense ...
As always ... (mr. hoduski voice) stay tuned ...
And no. Its not Texas.
Its not A&M. Or Oklahoma. Or that red-headed stepchild of a State school down there. (Like the red-headed stepchild of a school in Kansas).
The ONLY way keeping the Big XII together in ANY current semblance, the ONLY way this makes sense ...
Is if Notre Dame is on the horizon.
Football drives everything in the NCAA. The Big XII currently cannot stage a conference title game, due to ten teams. The North lost the two teams most responsible for its, uuh, alleged "success" the last fifteen years.
You can move OU to the North, fine. That only makes sense if TCU is plucked to move to the South. (A move I fully expect to happen shortly).
So you still need one more to go title-gaming.
Why NOT Notre Dame?
The "bribe" today to hold the conference together gives Texas the right to form its own TV network. Like Notre Dame wouldn't take that offer? I can hear it now:
(big xii dude) yeah, you join our league ... you can form your own network! NBC can't possibly match that revenue just on football rights alone!
(notre dame dude) sweet! where do i sign!
I've been called crazy, I've been called nuts, I've been called "destined for Two Rivers Psychiatric Ward on 51st and Raytown Road". But on this, on THIS ... I think I'm 100% Psychic.
Notre Dame is coming to the Big XII. Along with my alma mater.
Its the ONLY way today's conference "saving" makes sense ...
As always ... (mr. hoduski voice) stay tuned ...
pebble, omaha, and raytown. one helluva combo ...
This weekend sees the start of my two favorite events of the summer.
The US Open, this year at Pebble Beach.
And the College World Series, for the final time at Rosenblatt.
The US Open is my favorite golf tournament. I love the ridiculous course setup that makes six over par a respectable final score. I love Johnny Miller exploiting his greatest (and arguably only) career accomplishment for all its worth, posting the lowest final round in Open history 37 freaking years ago. Toss in Roger Maltbie's (possibly) inebriated commentary, and its appointment television.
Just like the College World Series is appointment viewing (and attendance). I'm gonna miss Rosenblatt. Sure, its a dump ... but its an awesome, history filled dump. There's something to be said for spending 9 plus hours baking in the sun on metal bleachers with a bunch of hammered college kids. (And anytime two Florida schools, plus Arizona State, make it, like they have this year, there's plenty of attractive co-eds to look at for said 9 hours of baking in the sun. Good times!)
My alma mater made it to Omaha for the first time ever, by beating Texas yesterday to win the super regional. UCLA, Florida, Florida State, Arizona State, and South Carolina have punched their tickets, and either Clemson or Alabama, and either Oklahoma or Virginia, will wrap up the final two berths this afternoon. All in all, this should be one of the deepest fields in a while, a fitting send off to Rosenblatt. Only three of the eight national seeds have made it so far (Arizona State, Florida, UCLA), and Virginia can still get in to make it four. The fun starts Saturday afternoon; I hope to make it either Monday or Tuesday, whichever day the alma mater plays its second game.
Now that the preview is out of the way, a few random thoughts from the weekend that was:
* Sunday was just about the most ridiculous weather day around here in a while. I was dog-sitting for my brother Saturday night. Woke up Sunday morning, and it was sunny at his place. I called my friends whose deck I was slated to work on, and was told "its a monsoon out here". Once the rains ended, the deck dried pretty quick, we got it swept up, got the paint out ... and bammo, a seemingly innocent looking single rain cloud opened up and dumped almost an inch of rain over half an hour. Once that shower ended at about 2:15, 2:20 ... well, hopefully the pic I tried to take shows how insanely hot it got:
(if you look closely, you might be able to see the steam rising. photo: my quickfire phone).
For a solid 15 minutes, the steam just kept rising. The deck dried out that quick, by the time the steam was done (thank you 90 degree temps!), there was plenty of time left to get the deck re-stained and ready for summer. (Whew). But that was weird. I'd never seen a wooden deck so freaking hot before after a downpour that it was steaming. Kind of neat.
* Of course, Saturday's weather wasn't any better. I set out to help the folks about 9:30 Saturday morning ... and by the time I hit State Line, it was pouring. You couldn't see like 10 feet in front of you. Needless to say, their lawn didn't get mowed. It kept raining all morning ... and early afternoon ... and finally stopped about halftime of the USA / England match.
* Which was just in time for Dusty to get the grill fired up for some chicken wings for the second half. Come on, who else was I gonna watch a big soccer game with, Gregg? Hell, he probably didn't even know Team USA was playing. The only drawback was said rain -- its just not an official "Steve and Dusty watch a big event together" party unless there's a TV out on the deck.
* Very good game, by the way. How Tim Howard kept playing after that sick slide by the English dude into him, I have no idea. Anytime you need a painkiller at halftime just to be able to raise your arm, that's probably not a good thing. But a tremendous showing by our goalie. Ditto that Steve Cherundula guy on defense. And not just because he's the one guy on our roster named "Steve". Hopefully Team USA keeps showing up going forward -- if they play their next two games like they played the first one, they're winning Group C.
* Not much happening on Friday. Spent the afternoon poolside, under the tried and proven "any day that's hot enough, that putting on a t-shirt seems like the most ridiculous thing imaginable, is a perfect Steve Day!" theory. Then poor Gus had to pay off his NASCAR and IndyCar debts to me. Yup, nothing says "DUI alert! DUI alert!" like me and Gus at the Daily Double. Especially when he's on the hook for all my booze. (To his credit, he paid off all 8 vodka tonics. To my detriment, I only got through 6 1/2 of them. Wait, what am I saying. Kudos to our bartender Jennifer, for basically making eight consecutive vodka shots disguised as tonics! These things were more ridiculous than "Steve style", which is defined as 50% booze, 50% mixer, no need for ice. These made the tall vodka tonics at Quinton's look weak, and Quinton's are pushing 60% booze / 40% mixer in a pint glass. The lesson? I love the Daily Double!)
* Although while I'm at it, yeah, the Double rules. Its a complete hole in the wall (almost literally). You don't even know its there unless you're looking for it. The entrance just says "Lounge". (That just cracks me up for some reason. When I walk into an establishment identified as "Lounge", I expect a bunch of dirty old guys ogling the hot young female talent in the joint. On second thought, that pretty much is the Double's nightly crowd. Never mind.)
Yes, the folks are friendly and boozy. The atmosphere is pretty cool. But they need two things to make this place THE best place in Raytown. One is obvious. A shuffleboard table. You're not officially a dive bar, a "lounge" act, until you have a shuffleboard table.
But the other thing? Ban smoking.
Yup, I've done a total 180 on public bans on smoking. As recently as a year ago, I opposed banning smoking in a bar because, well, (gregg voice) its a bar! Now though? I'm pushing halfway through my 30s. I wake up every morning sounding like a 30 year smoker, I'm hacking up so much stuff thanks to allergies. And I hate being around cigarette smoke indoors. I don't get it either. Cigar smoke, wonderful. The tobacco-like substance I've been known to enjoy from time to time? Can't get enough of it. But cigarettes just irritate me. The lesson? I'm not sure. Either I'm turning into a cranky, creppy old man ... or I'm completely insane. Possibly both. But still, I do wish the Double would go smoke-free indoors. My eyes are blood-shot and watery enough thanks to allergies and vodka. I don't need someone's used up Basic Menthol making it worse.
* Coming later tonight ... or tomorrow sometime ... my thoughts on the Big XII (minus two) staying relatively intact. I guess I just view this differently than a lot of folks in KC, especially those who work on 610's afternoon drive-time program ...
The US Open, this year at Pebble Beach.
And the College World Series, for the final time at Rosenblatt.
The US Open is my favorite golf tournament. I love the ridiculous course setup that makes six over par a respectable final score. I love Johnny Miller exploiting his greatest (and arguably only) career accomplishment for all its worth, posting the lowest final round in Open history 37 freaking years ago. Toss in Roger Maltbie's (possibly) inebriated commentary, and its appointment television.
Just like the College World Series is appointment viewing (and attendance). I'm gonna miss Rosenblatt. Sure, its a dump ... but its an awesome, history filled dump. There's something to be said for spending 9 plus hours baking in the sun on metal bleachers with a bunch of hammered college kids. (And anytime two Florida schools, plus Arizona State, make it, like they have this year, there's plenty of attractive co-eds to look at for said 9 hours of baking in the sun. Good times!)
My alma mater made it to Omaha for the first time ever, by beating Texas yesterday to win the super regional. UCLA, Florida, Florida State, Arizona State, and South Carolina have punched their tickets, and either Clemson or Alabama, and either Oklahoma or Virginia, will wrap up the final two berths this afternoon. All in all, this should be one of the deepest fields in a while, a fitting send off to Rosenblatt. Only three of the eight national seeds have made it so far (Arizona State, Florida, UCLA), and Virginia can still get in to make it four. The fun starts Saturday afternoon; I hope to make it either Monday or Tuesday, whichever day the alma mater plays its second game.
Now that the preview is out of the way, a few random thoughts from the weekend that was:
* Sunday was just about the most ridiculous weather day around here in a while. I was dog-sitting for my brother Saturday night. Woke up Sunday morning, and it was sunny at his place. I called my friends whose deck I was slated to work on, and was told "its a monsoon out here". Once the rains ended, the deck dried pretty quick, we got it swept up, got the paint out ... and bammo, a seemingly innocent looking single rain cloud opened up and dumped almost an inch of rain over half an hour. Once that shower ended at about 2:15, 2:20 ... well, hopefully the pic I tried to take shows how insanely hot it got:
(if you look closely, you might be able to see the steam rising. photo: my quickfire phone).
For a solid 15 minutes, the steam just kept rising. The deck dried out that quick, by the time the steam was done (thank you 90 degree temps!), there was plenty of time left to get the deck re-stained and ready for summer. (Whew). But that was weird. I'd never seen a wooden deck so freaking hot before after a downpour that it was steaming. Kind of neat.
* Of course, Saturday's weather wasn't any better. I set out to help the folks about 9:30 Saturday morning ... and by the time I hit State Line, it was pouring. You couldn't see like 10 feet in front of you. Needless to say, their lawn didn't get mowed. It kept raining all morning ... and early afternoon ... and finally stopped about halftime of the USA / England match.
* Which was just in time for Dusty to get the grill fired up for some chicken wings for the second half. Come on, who else was I gonna watch a big soccer game with, Gregg? Hell, he probably didn't even know Team USA was playing. The only drawback was said rain -- its just not an official "Steve and Dusty watch a big event together" party unless there's a TV out on the deck.
* Very good game, by the way. How Tim Howard kept playing after that sick slide by the English dude into him, I have no idea. Anytime you need a painkiller at halftime just to be able to raise your arm, that's probably not a good thing. But a tremendous showing by our goalie. Ditto that Steve Cherundula guy on defense. And not just because he's the one guy on our roster named "Steve". Hopefully Team USA keeps showing up going forward -- if they play their next two games like they played the first one, they're winning Group C.
* Not much happening on Friday. Spent the afternoon poolside, under the tried and proven "any day that's hot enough, that putting on a t-shirt seems like the most ridiculous thing imaginable, is a perfect Steve Day!" theory. Then poor Gus had to pay off his NASCAR and IndyCar debts to me. Yup, nothing says "DUI alert! DUI alert!" like me and Gus at the Daily Double. Especially when he's on the hook for all my booze. (To his credit, he paid off all 8 vodka tonics. To my detriment, I only got through 6 1/2 of them. Wait, what am I saying. Kudos to our bartender Jennifer, for basically making eight consecutive vodka shots disguised as tonics! These things were more ridiculous than "Steve style", which is defined as 50% booze, 50% mixer, no need for ice. These made the tall vodka tonics at Quinton's look weak, and Quinton's are pushing 60% booze / 40% mixer in a pint glass. The lesson? I love the Daily Double!)
* Although while I'm at it, yeah, the Double rules. Its a complete hole in the wall (almost literally). You don't even know its there unless you're looking for it. The entrance just says "Lounge". (That just cracks me up for some reason. When I walk into an establishment identified as "Lounge", I expect a bunch of dirty old guys ogling the hot young female talent in the joint. On second thought, that pretty much is the Double's nightly crowd. Never mind.)
Yes, the folks are friendly and boozy. The atmosphere is pretty cool. But they need two things to make this place THE best place in Raytown. One is obvious. A shuffleboard table. You're not officially a dive bar, a "lounge" act, until you have a shuffleboard table.
But the other thing? Ban smoking.
Yup, I've done a total 180 on public bans on smoking. As recently as a year ago, I opposed banning smoking in a bar because, well, (gregg voice) its a bar! Now though? I'm pushing halfway through my 30s. I wake up every morning sounding like a 30 year smoker, I'm hacking up so much stuff thanks to allergies. And I hate being around cigarette smoke indoors. I don't get it either. Cigar smoke, wonderful. The tobacco-like substance I've been known to enjoy from time to time? Can't get enough of it. But cigarettes just irritate me. The lesson? I'm not sure. Either I'm turning into a cranky, creppy old man ... or I'm completely insane. Possibly both. But still, I do wish the Double would go smoke-free indoors. My eyes are blood-shot and watery enough thanks to allergies and vodka. I don't need someone's used up Basic Menthol making it worse.
* Coming later tonight ... or tomorrow sometime ... my thoughts on the Big XII (minus two) staying relatively intact. I guess I just view this differently than a lot of folks in KC, especially those who work on 610's afternoon drive-time program ...
perfectly stated
sk: Bob Ray Sanders is the Lewis Diuguid of the Star-Telegram. The man could find racism based on the color of cheese you order for your burger. To put it mildly, he's not one of my favorite columnists most of the time.
However -- when he's on, there's nobody that lays out his argument better. Like yesterday's brilliant opinion piece on "modern day prohibition".
No matter your position on the issue, I think its a good read. At least until I finish up the other couple of posts I have planned for today, then that'll be an even better read ...
However -- when he's on, there's nobody that lays out his argument better. Like yesterday's brilliant opinion piece on "modern day prohibition".
No matter your position on the issue, I think its a good read. At least until I finish up the other couple of posts I have planned for today, then that'll be an even better read ...
Thursday, June 10, 2010
party like its 2006! wait. what?!?! ...
sk: arguably my favorite Youtube! clip ever. I hate flyovers with a passion ... unless it involves (a) a huge Chiefs game (in this case, the home opener), (b) one of my two favorite Anthem singers ever (in this case, the awesome Ida McBeth), and (c) its linked on Youtube!
Jesus, what I wouldn't give to repeat this at about 9:08pm on Monday, September 13th ...
Jesus, what I wouldn't give to repeat this at about 9:08pm on Monday, September 13th ...
world cup predictions
Since nobody outside of me, Dusty, and possibly Brent cares … Steve predicts World Cup 2010!
Group A: (1) Mexico, (2) South Africa. Also rans are France and Uruguay.
Group B: (1) Greece, (2) Argentina. Also rans are Nigeria and South Korea.
Group C: (1) USA, (2) England. USA beats England 2-0, beats Slovenia 2-1, beats Algeria 3-0. Also rans (obviously) Slovenia and Algeria.
Group D: (1) Germany, (2) Serbia. Also rans Australia and Ghana.
Group E: (1) Netherlands, (2) Cameroon. Also rans Denmark and Japan.
Group F: (1) Paraguay, (2) Italy. Also rans New Zealand and Slovenia (who?)
Group G: (1) Portugal, (2) Brazil. Also rans Ivory Coast and North Korea.
Group H: (1) Spain, (2) Chile. Also rans Switzerland and Honduras.
Round of 16:
Mexico over Argentina.
Greece over South Africa.
USA 3, Serbia 1.
England over Germany.
Netherlands over Italy.
Paraguay over Cameroon.
Portugal over Chile.
Brazil over Spain.
Quarterfinals:
USA 2, Mexico 0.
England over Greece.
Portugal over Netherlands.
Brazil over Paraguay.
Semifinals:
USA 4, Portugal 2.
Brazil over England.
World Cup Champion:
Brazil 3, USA 2.
Group A: (1) Mexico, (2) South Africa. Also rans are France and Uruguay.
Group B: (1) Greece, (2) Argentina. Also rans are Nigeria and South Korea.
Group C: (1) USA, (2) England. USA beats England 2-0, beats Slovenia 2-1, beats Algeria 3-0. Also rans (obviously) Slovenia and Algeria.
Group D: (1) Germany, (2) Serbia. Also rans Australia and Ghana.
Group E: (1) Netherlands, (2) Cameroon. Also rans Denmark and Japan.
Group F: (1) Paraguay, (2) Italy. Also rans New Zealand and Slovenia (who?)
Group G: (1) Portugal, (2) Brazil. Also rans Ivory Coast and North Korea.
Group H: (1) Spain, (2) Chile. Also rans Switzerland and Honduras.
Round of 16:
Mexico over Argentina.
Greece over South Africa.
USA 3, Serbia 1.
England over Germany.
Netherlands over Italy.
Paraguay over Cameroon.
Portugal over Chile.
Brazil over Spain.
Quarterfinals:
USA 2, Mexico 0.
England over Greece.
Portugal over Netherlands.
Brazil over Paraguay.
Semifinals:
USA 4, Portugal 2.
Brazil over England.
World Cup Champion:
Brazil 3, USA 2.
send lawyers, guns, and money ...
"The sh*t has hit the fan!”
-- Warren Zevon, “Lawyers, Guns, and Money”
------------------------------------------------
Well, the sh*t has hit the fan, hasn’t it?
I had intended for the first post in a couple weeks to be a massive mailbag, but instead, I think I’ll break this into a number of smaller posts, so that if you don’t care about the apparent end of the Big XII, or the end of “Lost”, or the Bucks draft, or 350,001st planning, or anything else this somewhat insane brain of mine thinks up, then you can skip it.
Earlier today, Big XII North doormat Colorado became the first to officially jump off the HMS Big XII, bailing to become the 11th team in the (now misnamed) Pac 10. Tomorrow, it is widely expected that Nebraska will bail on the rapidly sinking conference, and officially join the (long-term misnamed) Big 10 as their 12th school.
And depending on which rumors, blogs, or semi-reputable websites you read, the entire Big XII South is ready to bolt for parts unknown.
There’s a very real probability that come Monday morning, the Big XII will be down to four schools: Kansas, Kansas State, Missouri, and Iowa State.
Everyone seems to have a theory as to what caused the Big XII to reach this point. Yahoo! Sports Dan Wetzel believes it is when Big XII commish (and all around f*cking idiot) Dan Beebe voted no on the and-one proposal two years ago. I argue he’s got the general timeframe right, but the wrong reason.
The Big XII was finished when Dr. Tom came in from retirement in 2007, put “Surrender” Steve Pederson out to pasture, fired “Sur” William Callahan, and made it his personal mission in life to restore Nebraska football to what it once was.
Once Dr. Tom returned, and Nebraska set out to regain its spot atop the Big XII mountain, this conference was doomed. Not just because Texas wasn’t going to stand by and see their power base erode. Especially to a rival they’d already vanquished. But because once Dr. Tom returned, tradition mattered again. The way things were had value again. And the only way things could return to how they used to be … was to knock Texas off the top rung.
The final nail in the coffin that holds the decaying corpse of this conference was the Big XII Title Game last December. We all remember it. The heavily favored Texas Longhorns, playing essentially a home game, a layup victory away from playing for the national title. All they had to do was beat the “best of the worst”, the North champion Cornhuskers.
As I noted at the time, as the only person I know of who thought the two touchdown Huskers would put up a fight: “The return to all that is good, decent, and right about college football continues in a big way. Tradition should matter. Power I should matter. Winning with class, integrity, and a suffocating defense should matter.”
Tradition, class, integrity, good, decent, right … all chucked out the window when a replay official “graciously” put an extra second on the clock, to allow Texas to escape with a one point win via a 47 yard field goal kicked on that extra second.
Dr. Tom has far too much class, integrity, and civility to ever admit it publicly. But I firmly believe that night, witnessing that embarrassment of a finale, he privately checked out. His return was the beginning of the end. That title game was hitting the iceberg. And Texas’ ridiculous “deadline setting” this week, a “loyalty clause”, issued by a member who didn’t have the “tradition” and “ties” to the old Big 8, was the ship splitting in two.
I don’t blame Nebraska for leaving. I’d get the hell out of this shady conference too if I was in their position. Look it, my school benefited tremendously from arguably the shadiest moment in this conference’s football history, the insane decision to pick Kansas over Missouri for the Orange Bowl two years ago, despite KU not winning their division, and getting their ass kicked by Mizzou eight days earlier. It was a joke then. It should have been a warning sign as well.
The conference gave us a lot of good moments. Three BCS championships -- 97 Huskers (beat Tennessee), 00 Sooners (beat FSU), and 05 Longhorns (beat USC). Eight teams playing for the BCS championship -- in addition to the three winners, also the 01 Huskers (lost to Miami), 03 Sooners (lost to LSU), 04 Sooners (lost to USC … for now …), 08 Sooners (lost to Florida), and 09 Longhorns (lost to Alabama). And of the conference teams, seven reached BCS bowls (Nebraska, OU, Texas, Texas A&M, Kansas State, KU, and Colorado).
It gave us one hoops champion, the 2008 Jayhawks. But 4 of the 12 members reached the Final Four at least once – KU (02, 03, 08), OU (02), Oklahoma State (04), Texas (03), and 4 more reached the Elite 8 at least once – MU (02, 09), Baylor (10), Iowa State (00), and Kansas State (10). Texas won my favorite event of the summer, the College World Series, twice (02, 05). Also making it all the way to Rosenblatt were Baylor (05), Nebraska (01, 02, 05), Oklahoma State (96, 99) and Texas A&M (99).
On the court, on the diamond, on the gridiron, the conference was tremendously successful. Off of it, it was doomed from the moment Dr. Tom returned to the top of the Huskers athletic department, if not sooner.
And you know what? I’m good with it. Its been a tremendous 15 year run. But as Jacob so eloquently put it in “Lost” (and yes, that humongous post is coming eventually …), as he so perfectly put it: “It only ends once. Everything else is progress”.
Today, as the conference dies, is progress. Its progress for the teams leaving, and for the teams left behind.
Which begs the question: so what’s next for KU? Well … stay tuned. I have a post on that coming up relatively soon …
-- Warren Zevon, “Lawyers, Guns, and Money”
------------------------------------------------
Well, the sh*t has hit the fan, hasn’t it?
I had intended for the first post in a couple weeks to be a massive mailbag, but instead, I think I’ll break this into a number of smaller posts, so that if you don’t care about the apparent end of the Big XII, or the end of “Lost”, or the Bucks draft, or 350,001st planning, or anything else this somewhat insane brain of mine thinks up, then you can skip it.
Earlier today, Big XII North doormat Colorado became the first to officially jump off the HMS Big XII, bailing to become the 11th team in the (now misnamed) Pac 10. Tomorrow, it is widely expected that Nebraska will bail on the rapidly sinking conference, and officially join the (long-term misnamed) Big 10 as their 12th school.
And depending on which rumors, blogs, or semi-reputable websites you read, the entire Big XII South is ready to bolt for parts unknown.
There’s a very real probability that come Monday morning, the Big XII will be down to four schools: Kansas, Kansas State, Missouri, and Iowa State.
Everyone seems to have a theory as to what caused the Big XII to reach this point. Yahoo! Sports Dan Wetzel believes it is when Big XII commish (and all around f*cking idiot) Dan Beebe voted no on the and-one proposal two years ago. I argue he’s got the general timeframe right, but the wrong reason.
The Big XII was finished when Dr. Tom came in from retirement in 2007, put “Surrender” Steve Pederson out to pasture, fired “Sur” William Callahan, and made it his personal mission in life to restore Nebraska football to what it once was.
Once Dr. Tom returned, and Nebraska set out to regain its spot atop the Big XII mountain, this conference was doomed. Not just because Texas wasn’t going to stand by and see their power base erode. Especially to a rival they’d already vanquished. But because once Dr. Tom returned, tradition mattered again. The way things were had value again. And the only way things could return to how they used to be … was to knock Texas off the top rung.
The final nail in the coffin that holds the decaying corpse of this conference was the Big XII Title Game last December. We all remember it. The heavily favored Texas Longhorns, playing essentially a home game, a layup victory away from playing for the national title. All they had to do was beat the “best of the worst”, the North champion Cornhuskers.
As I noted at the time, as the only person I know of who thought the two touchdown Huskers would put up a fight: “The return to all that is good, decent, and right about college football continues in a big way. Tradition should matter. Power I should matter. Winning with class, integrity, and a suffocating defense should matter.”
Tradition, class, integrity, good, decent, right … all chucked out the window when a replay official “graciously” put an extra second on the clock, to allow Texas to escape with a one point win via a 47 yard field goal kicked on that extra second.
Dr. Tom has far too much class, integrity, and civility to ever admit it publicly. But I firmly believe that night, witnessing that embarrassment of a finale, he privately checked out. His return was the beginning of the end. That title game was hitting the iceberg. And Texas’ ridiculous “deadline setting” this week, a “loyalty clause”, issued by a member who didn’t have the “tradition” and “ties” to the old Big 8, was the ship splitting in two.
I don’t blame Nebraska for leaving. I’d get the hell out of this shady conference too if I was in their position. Look it, my school benefited tremendously from arguably the shadiest moment in this conference’s football history, the insane decision to pick Kansas over Missouri for the Orange Bowl two years ago, despite KU not winning their division, and getting their ass kicked by Mizzou eight days earlier. It was a joke then. It should have been a warning sign as well.
The conference gave us a lot of good moments. Three BCS championships -- 97 Huskers (beat Tennessee), 00 Sooners (beat FSU), and 05 Longhorns (beat USC). Eight teams playing for the BCS championship -- in addition to the three winners, also the 01 Huskers (lost to Miami), 03 Sooners (lost to LSU), 04 Sooners (lost to USC … for now …), 08 Sooners (lost to Florida), and 09 Longhorns (lost to Alabama). And of the conference teams, seven reached BCS bowls (Nebraska, OU, Texas, Texas A&M, Kansas State, KU, and Colorado).
It gave us one hoops champion, the 2008 Jayhawks. But 4 of the 12 members reached the Final Four at least once – KU (02, 03, 08), OU (02), Oklahoma State (04), Texas (03), and 4 more reached the Elite 8 at least once – MU (02, 09), Baylor (10), Iowa State (00), and Kansas State (10). Texas won my favorite event of the summer, the College World Series, twice (02, 05). Also making it all the way to Rosenblatt were Baylor (05), Nebraska (01, 02, 05), Oklahoma State (96, 99) and Texas A&M (99).
On the court, on the diamond, on the gridiron, the conference was tremendously successful. Off of it, it was doomed from the moment Dr. Tom returned to the top of the Huskers athletic department, if not sooner.
And you know what? I’m good with it. Its been a tremendous 15 year run. But as Jacob so eloquently put it in “Lost” (and yes, that humongous post is coming eventually …), as he so perfectly put it: “It only ends once. Everything else is progress”.
Today, as the conference dies, is progress. Its progress for the teams leaving, and for the teams left behind.
Which begs the question: so what’s next for KU? Well … stay tuned. I have a post on that coming up relatively soon …
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