Friday, November 16, 2012

mixology 2012 part cinco: the bengals


Welcome back everyone!  I apologize for the nearly week long absence.  I’m still in either phase two or three of denial over last Tuesday’s outcome.  But eventually, you gotta get back on the horsie and ride that pony.  Well, unless you’re Eric Berry.  Then you cower in irrational fear when seeing said proverbial horsie.

Here’s the Initial Playlist for Sunday’s impending debacle against the Bengals.  Like the last couple Mixology choices, it’s heavy both on classic rock and modern indie stuff, with a healthy dose of the 80s mixed in.  As always, if you’re coming on Sunday, feel free to join us (the grassy lot just north of the G30 pole), and if you’re coming Sunday, and joining us?  Feel free to leave suggestions to add to the playlist in the comments section, or hit me up on Twitter (@teamtito15) or email (teamtito15@yahoo.com).

Or hell, just show up and witness something that if you’d told 20 year old me that 35 year old me would ever experience – a NFL starting quarterback that attended and/or graduated from my alma mater – that I would have laughed myself into a coma over.  We now live in a world in which a TCU quarterback can not only start in the NFL, he can lead his team to the playoffs.  20 year old me sitting through an 0-10 start to the season would have laughed you out of Amon Carter Stadium at that absurd idea.

Here we go.  First, the holdovers, and the reason(s) for their inclusion:

* “God Only Knows” by the Beach Boys.  Entertainment Weekly has called this the greatest pop song ever recorded.  I disagree … but it’s in the realm of discussion.

* “Wouldn’t It Be Nice” by the Beach Boys.  If you’ve ever seen “Roger and Me”, that scene where Ben, the GM employee, has his mental breakdown as this song is playing?  Let’s just say, that when ABC projected Mr. Obama over the 270 threshold, that I immediately muted the TV, and cranked this song up on iTunes as I pounded four bottles of wine.

* “Ticket to Ride” by the Beatles.  Their most underrated effort.

* “Hey Jude” by the Beatles.  Their most overrated effort.

* “Let It Be” by the Beatles.  THIS is the greatest pop song ever recorded.  Sorry, EW and any musician with the last name of Wilson.

* “No Diggity” by Blackstreet (featuring Dr. Dre).  Play on, playa.  Play on, playa.  Come on, nobody my age can hate this song.  Hell, nobody my parents age can hate this song. 

* “The More I Drink” by Blake Shelton.  Well, duh.

* “Could You Be Loved” by Bob Marley.  Remember the stash, Champ.  I’m jonesing for a couple hits.  You at least owe me that after the last few months dude.

(Christ, way to be subtle there, Stevo.)

* “One Love/People Get Ready” by Bob Marley.  True story: I had Tuesday off, because back in April when I thought the Chiefs were going to be worth two shits, I saw we had a Monday nighter, and figured I’d need the next day to recover.  Anyways, I somehow woke up in time to catch “The Price is Right”, and one of the prizes was an all expenses paid, all inclusive 8 day / 7 night trip to Jamaica.  Care to guess the value of this trip?  And keep in mind – I priced Jamaican trips for my buddy DJ’s wedding last year (and quickly realized I couldn’t afford it).  $7500.  $7500!  Jesus, I thought $2000 was high last year for Ocho!  All I can say is, for that extra $5500, there better be some HELLA good weed thrown in as a lovely arriving gift.

* “Lido Shuffle” by Boz Skaggs.  One of about 11-12 non-negotiable, “included no matter what” all time classics.  I mean, come on, you know you wanna.  LIDO!  WHOA OAH OAH OAH OAH OAH! 

* “One Toke Over the Line” by Brewer and Shipley.  Somehow, this is my dad’s favorite song.  And if you know my dad … wait a second: mellowest dude I know.  Completely laid back.  Never lets anything phase him.  Uum, let’s move on before I start making assumptions …

* “Word Up” by Cameo.  I’d have to walk home if I didn’t include this on the rotation.

* “Down On the Corner” by Creedence Clearwater Revival.  No song brought a bigger applause out of the assembled tailgating masses last game, than this one.  Which sucks – I was hoping my Rolling Stones kick would accomplish that.  But still, great song that will get rewound at least once if it pops up.

* “Up Around the Bend” by Creedence Clearwater Revival.  I like this song.  Sue me.

* “You Never Even Called Me By My Name” by David Allan Coe.  It truly is the perfect country and western song.

* “I’ve Been Waiting” by Dazz Band.  Trust me, you’ve heard it.  I swear to Christ, you’ve heard it.

* “Layla”, original version by Derek and the Dominoes.  Still my favorite Dusty story to this day: the first time he heard this song in my presence, and he’s like “that’s a really great song.  What is it?”  I’m like “It’s Layla.  Eric Clapton, actually Derek and the Dominoes, but it’s Layla.  Written about George Harrison’s wife actually”.  Which prompted two classic DJ responses: (1) “Who’s George Harrison”, and (2) “this isn’t Layla!  Layla’s a slow, stripped down song!”  Kids.  Christ.  Who’s George Harrison*.  Just for that, we’re sliding at least two efforts by him onto the Mixology list this week.  (And your true fact of the day: the last Beatle to record a song to hit number one was … well, the Beatles, with “Free As a Bird” off the first Anthology.  But before that, it was George Harrison, with “I Got My Mind Set On You”.  Stay tuned; that’ll be on here eventually.)

(*: Champ, George Harrison was a Beatle.  His biggest, most well known ballad with them was probably “Something”, one of the most amazing songs ever written.  He also released the best post-Beatles song any of them did, with “What Is Life”.  Who’s George Harrison.  Kids.  Christ.)

* “Down With the Sickness” by Disturbed.  No brainer.  All time tailgating classic.  Plus, you can’t beat when this starts playing, and I start the slow beat dancing, and then drop the “aw shit!” to lead into the good stuff.  I just like the phrase “aw shit”.  Especially when a five year old is saying it while playing washers.

* “Soldier of Love” by Donny Osmond.  It’s on the fence.  It’s the one late 80s ballad I struggle to justify the inclusion of.  Talk me off the ledge – give me a reason(s) to keep it.

* “Hotel California” by the Eagles (live version from “Hell Freezes Over”).  God I love this song. 

* “September” by Earth Wind and Fire.  Speaking of songs I love … here’s my proposal, Clark Hunt and Hunt Family, and hell, even Scott Pioli.  (Sorry Coach Baffoon – you’re a goner.)  IF – and I’m being EXTREMELY MUY GENEROSO here – IF you bring back Patti DiParto Livergood and the TD Pack Band?  I’ll guarantee I renew both my seats.  It’s outrageous that I’m not welcomed to Arrowhead for the home opener as she plays this song.  Outrageous.  Fix that?  You get my $1200 and change again next year, roster and coaching changes unseen.  Deal?

* “Lose Yourself” by Eminem.  I bowl every Wednesday night.  This week, I forgot my earplug headphones (to listen to Pandora or my Blackberry iTunes stash while I’m bowling, to drown out distractions with music), so I had my massive “cover half your head” headphones I wear to Chiefs games to listen to the broadcast with.  This prompted every member of Team Panda (who whipped our ass this week) to start calling me “Eminem” all night long.  I promised to include this song in tribute to my (apparent) street cred I gained on Wednesday night.  (Street cred?  Jesus, people actually use phrases like that?  No wonder Obama won re-election – we’re too damned stupid as a society to realize that Economics 101 or Common Sense 101 cred should matter mor … let’s just move on before I piss off 50.7% of the readership.)

* “Layla”, the acoustic Unplugged version, by Eric Clapton.  If ever anything screamed for a Nick Bakay “Tale of the Tape” breakdown, it’s the original Layla versus the unplugged version.  Cause I’ll be damned if I can pick a winner.  They both rock something awesome.

* “Dance Dance” by Fall Out Boy.  I so wanted to put “Sugar, We’re Going Down” … but sadly, there will be nobody there on Sunday who is a “notch on my bedpost”.  Son of a …

* “We Are Young” by Fun. (featuring Janelle Monae).  Tonight, we are young!  (And defeated.  Good God, DEFEATED.)

* “Rock and Roll Part II” by Gary Glitter.  Because anytime a 70 something year old child molester can be on the Mixology list, you have to do it.

* “Dream Weaver” by Gary Wright.  This one is a Stevo-picked inclusion.  Not up for discussion.

* “Somebody That I Used to Know” by Gotye.  “But you didn’t have to cut me off!”  It’s been way, way, way too long since I had to use that phrase in an argument with a girl.

* “Maneater” by Hall and Oates.  Combined with …

* “Private Eyes” by Hall and Oates.  Combined with …

* “Rich Girl” by Hall and Oates.  Come on, you KNOW you want to.  “You’re a rich girl, and you’ve gone too far, cause you know it don’t matter anyway.  You can rely on the old man’s money, you can rely on the old man’s money!  It’s a bitch girl …”

* “Long Cool Woman (In a Black Dress)” by the Hollies.  If you don’t like this song, I question whether or not you have a pulse.

* “Shout” by the Isley Brothers.  NOBODY nails the “lil’ bit softer now … lil’ bit softer now … lil’ bit Louder now … lil’ bit LOUDER now!” moment better than me.  Other than everyone in “Animal House” of course.  God, is that movie really as old as I am?!?!?!  Sweet merciful Jesus.

* “Somebody to Love” by Jefferson Airplane.  My favorite bts story (at least I think it was Brent): he was in an airport and texted us that “I just met Grace Slick.  (pause).  Who’s Grace Slick?”  Kids.  Christ.

* “I Got a Name” by Jim Croce.  One of the 11-12 “not a shot in hell I’m booting this” choices in the Mixology rotation.  God, I LOVE this song.  But what shocked me most of all, at the last tailgate?  Was that “The Crush” was totally digging this song!  No, really – we even sang out loud the last two verses together, and she knew every damned word!  She truly IS “the Crush” for a reason!  “Like the fool I am and I’ll always be, I’ve got a dream.  I’ve got a dream!  They can change their minds, but they can’t change me.  I’ve got a dream.  I’ve got a dream!  Oh, I know I could share it if you want me to.  And if you’re going my way?  I’ll go with you!”  Hang on, I gotta rewind this one before moving on … although the next song certainly could describe my feelings for how I feel about this one …

* “I Hate Myself for Loving You” by Joan Jett and the Blackhawks.  If it’s good enough for NBC to rewrite every week to introduce the biggest game of the week, it’s good enough to earn four minutes of playtime on a grassy lot at Arrowhead.

* “Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off” by Joe Nichols.  Sadly, we have NOT seen Castro yet this year!  What the hell?  Sal’s been to every game.  Ditto his annoying family across the causeway with their damned horn that never shuts up.  But no Castro!  This demands an investigation!  Is he in jail?  Is he dead?  Is he on the run from the law?  This is why this season has been such a disaster – I haven’t had my built in five shots of five different Patron’s before heading in.  It’s that, or not getting the alcohol flavored whipped cream shots sprayed into my mouth to “celebrate” a victory, as I’m on my knees and “The Ex” is spraying that shit down my throat.  I swear to Christ, this makes sense as it plays out.  It just sounds, uuh, (brian griffin voice) gay!, on paper.  (seinfeld voice) Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

* “Don’t Stop Believin’” by Journey.  Well of course this is on there.  It is “The Crush”’s ringtone for God’s sake.

* “Open Arms” by Journey.  I finally remembered why I loved this song so much – the Cold Case episode where this played over the closing aired a couple nights ago.  (“Baby Blues”, and if you’ve never seen it, or Cold Case, it’s available in its entirety on Youtube! for your viewing pleasure, and trust me – this 42 minutes, you won’t regret watching.  Or if you've seen the, uuh, scene in question, three you won't regret.)

* “Luckenback, Texas”, cover, by Kid Rock and Kenny Chesney.  If it has Russ’ seal of approval, it’s good enough for me.

* “Footloose” by Kenny Loggins.  (stevo giving death stare to anyone questioning this song’s inclusion in Mixology Version Cinco).

* “What I Like About You” by the Kinks.  It’s a classic.

* “Fresh” by Kool and the Gang.  “She’s a lady”.  That line NEVER fails to slay me. 

* “Jump!” by Kris Kross.  Jesus, this was a massive smash hit 21 years ago?  And I REMEMBER when it was a massive smash hit 21 years ago?  What, next thing I know, you’re going to tell me that underwear model / rapper Marky Mark is a reputable actor?  (being told that yes, Mark Wahlberg is a credible, reputable actor who starred in one of my favorite movies of all time, “Invincible”)  WHAT?!?!?!?!?!

* “Yeah!” by Lil’ Jon, Ludacris, and Usher.  I love songs with the “!” in their official title.

* “One Step Closer” by Linkin Park.  Hopefully we’ll be one step closer to the top overall draft pick by the time Sunday comes and goes.

* “Penny Lover” by Lionel Richie.  I refuse to walk home.

* “Dancing on the Ceiling” by Lionel Richie.  We have to win at some point, right?  Right?  (crickets chirping)  Right?

* “Party Rock Anthem” by LMFAO.  So not sorry to see “Jersey Shore” bite the dust.

* “Borderline” by Madonna.  Might have to add another Madonna track or two, to be honest.

* “Shining Star” by the Manhattans.  Is it a great “tailgating” song?  No, it’s not.  It’s slow, it’s sappy, it’s kind of a drag at times.  But – BUT! – come on folks!  How can you NOT!  LOVE!  THIS!  SONG!  “Honey you!  Are my shining star!  Don’t you go away!”

* “Every Monday” by Marvelous 3.  If you have never listened to anything Marvelous 3 did, please – download this song.  You will NOT regret the 3:30 you spend with it.  This song is EPIC.

* “Time to Pretend” by MGMT.  What, that we’re a legitimate NFL franchise?

* “Electric Feel” by MGMT.  That’s not a phrase any Chiefs fan will feel after watching this team play.

* “Kids” by MGMT.  Yeah, I love this band.

* “Party in the USA” by Miley Cyrus.  For dance potential.

* “Daydream Believer” by the Monkees.  This was the song that got the second most “sweet, glad to hear it!” compliments last home game, and considering we had a 6 ½ hour tailgate, that’s saying something.  I actually was listening to this on my Blackberry the other day, and somehow (stunner, I know) wound up singing out loud, and the lady that sits behind me looks up (she’s probably 60, 61 years old) with a “wait, YOU listen to the Monkees?!?!” look of “I’m not sure whether to be proud or feel really, really old” confusion on her face.  Yes, I listen to the Monkees.  My parents raised me right, godd*mmit!

* “Bye Bye Bye” by NSYNC.  Let’s hope these three words are what we are saying to Scott Pioli and Coach Baffoon in seven weeks.

* “Regulate” by Nate Dogg and Warren G.  Regulators!  Mount up …

* “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond.  My go-to karaoke option.

* “Stand by Me” by Otis Redding.  The best version of this song ever recorded.

* “In the Air Tonight” by Phil Collins.  Tailgating tradition.

* “Easy Lover” by Phillip Bailey and Phil Collins.  Great 80s track.  Fun song.

* “Home” by Phillip Phillips.  My favorite song of 2012, and I’d say that even if I wasn’t addicted to “American Idol”.

* “Boom!” by POD.  I don’t think you’re allowed to have a Mixology list for a Chiefs game without this song on there.

* “Killer Queen” by Queen.  This song is so good, on so many levels.  A masterpiece.

* “Endless Summer Nights” by Richard Marx.  The perfect late 1980s song.  Well, actually, “Right Here Waiting” is the perfect late 1980s song … but survey says, it came out in 1990!  Whew!

* “Sympathy for the Devil” by the Rolling Stones.  I’m on a huge, I mean hu-yuge, Stones kick lately.  It’ll show.

* “Get Off Of My Cloud” by the Rolling Stones.  This song just rules.  It’s cool, sing along – I’m about to: “The telephone is ringing / I say hi, it’s me / Who is it there on the line? / A voice says hi, how are you / Well I guess I’m doing fine / He says it’s 3am / There’s too much noise / Don’t you people ever want to go to bed?  Do you feel so good you have to / Drive me out of my head? … I said hey (hey!) you (you!) get off of my cloud!  Hey (hey!) you (you!) get off of my cloud! …”

* “Start Me Up” by the Rolling Stones.  Call me crazy, but anytime a song manages to use the phrase “you make a dead man cum”, you’re going on the Mixology rotation.  Come on, I made it to page 9 before the first not-even-remotely-funny-and-beyond-tasteless sex joke.  That’s gotta be a record for me.

* “Gimme Shelter” by the Rolling Stones.  Reminds me, if you have HBO, you HAVE to catch the Stones documentary that debuted yesterday, and has been airing since.  It’s incredible.  It’s the most fascinating music documentary since the Anthology series on the Beatles 17 years ago.

* “Gin and Juice” by Snoop Dogg.  Call me crazy, but anytime a song manages to use the phrase “rollin’ down the street, smokin’ endo, sippin’ on gin and juice!”, you’re going on the Mixology rotation.  Here’s how you know you’re damned old: I remember buying the cassette single for this song 21 years ago.  CASSETTE.  SINGLE.  Christ.

* “Faded” by soulDecision.  As long as I draw breath, this song will appear on Mixology.  Plus, I’ve always loved the line leading into the chorus: “Girl, do we do what we did last night again?  Baby, then you and I would be better friends.  Don’t you think it’s time we went a bit further, oh yeah?”  The song is about a random hookup for God’s sake, and he thinks its time we “went a bit further”?  That’s awesome!  Three hole playoff (rimshot!) 

* “Kiss ‘Em Goodbye” by Steam.  If I make it to Target tomorrow (and that’s doubtful, but I WILL before the broncos game) to buy the Scott Pioli Pinata?  Feel free to take your whacks at it with a crowbar while this song plays, and we all “express our love” for Mr. Pioli through song. 

* “I Don’t Remember Last Night” by Sunny Ledfurd.  Because anytime you not only don’t remember last night, you don’t remember a godd*mned thing?  You’re on Mixology.

* “Stranglehold” by Ted Nugent.  I’m seriously tempted to load “Kiss My Ass” onto next week’s Mixology.  You people have NO idea – no f*cking clue! – how much I am both anticipating and dreading next week’s tailgate.

* “Don’t Leave Me This Way” by Thelma Houston.  The one – ok, fine, I have more than one, but THE one – b*tch I have about my favorite movie of all time (that would be “Saturday Night Fever”), is that Tony and Annette should have rehearsed to this song, rather than Yvonne Elliman’s “If I Can’t Have You”.  Both choices work … but I think this one works better.  Barely.  God, when that’s my biggest b*tch, is that the “girl getting screwed over song” could have been slightly more epic?  It’s my favorite movie of all time for a reason.  (As I attempted to lay out last year.)

* “I Like It, I Love It” by Tim McGraw.  I was a freshman in college when this song came out.  My alma mater was still in the Southwest Conference when this song came out.  That was FOUR conferences ago (the WAC, the Mountain West, the Big East, and finally, where they should have been all along, the Big XII).  Also, did you see TCU upped tuition – again – to where the average student will plop down $31,000 a semester to attend school there?  Jesus!  And to think my parents b*tched at the $130,000 some odd dollars the best 3 ½ years of my life set them back!  Can you imagine being out $250,000 just for an undergrad degree? 

* “Free Fallin’” by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers.  Call me crazy (and I’ve been called worse) – this is my favorite Stevie Nicks effort. 

* “Save Me, San Francisco” by Train.  (stevo giving a death stare to ANYONE who opposes this being on Mixology Part Cinco).  GOD ABOVE, I LOVE THIS SONG!

* “Downfall” by TRUST Company.  Hey, he picked an alt-rockie type song thingy.  Good for you, Stevie!  Good job, Scuba Steve*!

(*: if you ever want to ensure I will literally get so enraged that I will threaten to throw down with you, call me “Scuba Steve” more than once.  You have NO idea how many lame ass “hey, it’s Scuba Steve!” jokes I had to endure after “Big Daddy” came out.  NO idea.  There is only one person allowed to get away with calling me that, and that is “My Special Little Guy”, my four year old nephew who thinks its funny.  (Hint: it’s not.)  Just a hint.  (“the crush” voice) Could I call you Scuba Steve?  Oh hell to the mother f*cking yes you can!)

* “Beautiful Day” by U2.  Pretty much how I feel about any GameDay, regardless of how awful the home team is.

* “Toes” by the Zac Brown Band.  I can think of worse places to be right now than a beach.  Arrowhead on Sunday immediately comes to mind.

* “Down” by 311.  The fun I used to have to this song back in the day with a certain fellow Horny Frog.  (pause.)  Wait, my mom reads this, let’s move on.

* “The Rising” by Bruce Springsteen.  Still my favorite by The Boss … although the entire cd “Tunnel of Love” is grousely underrated.  It’s Zues in nature.

* “Dust In The Wind” by Kansas.  YOU’RE MY BOY BLUE!!!

* “Aw, the denver broncos?!?!?!” from “The Simpsons”.  Always good for a laugh or fifty.

* “Black Betty” by Ram Jam.  I hate this song … but I do take requests.

* “Tailfeather” by Nelly.  I hate this song … but I do take requests.

* “The NFL on FOX Theme Song”, elongated / pimped out version.  I was happy to haul this one off the 2006 tailgating cd.  Good choice.

* “Hollaback Girl” by Gwen Stefani.  “This sh*t is bananas!  B-A-N-A-N-A-S!”

That’s 91 cuts from last week that made this week’s Mixology listing … which leaves a solid 40 slots wide, wide open.  I’m gonna fill some of them … and the remaining 10-12 I don’t fill, will get populated on the Bus Sunday morning on the ride out, as Sussan and I will do what we do best – start scanning my iTunes Library and giving a thumbs up or thumbs down to each potential choice.  Hey, it worked brilliantly three weeks ago.

The newest additions, in no particular order:

* “Paint It Black” by the Rolling Stones.  If you’ve ever seen my second favorite movie of all time (“The Devil’s Advocate”), you’ll get this line: “Vanity.  DEFINITELY my favorite sin!” 

* “Pretty Woman” by Roy Orbison.  Come on – that moment where Roy growls like a tiger on the prowl is legitimately laugh out loud, bring the room down in tears hysterical.     

* “Superfreak!” by Rick James (b*tch!).  God, is Eddie Murphy really so dated that his old SNL characters are no longer known by over half my readers?  “I’m Gumby, dammit!”  Although for comedy’s sake, NOTHING will top the use of this song in “Roseanne”’s 200th episode, “What a Day for a Daydream”, one of the few final season episodes that more than stands the test of time.  When Roseanne and Jackie are posing for their “Women of the Lottery” issue of Playboy, and the great Mr. Hugh M. Hefner walks in, sees the repulsive images, and immediately deadpans, “ladies, this is going to be something … REALLY special!”, it brings the house down.

* “Go All the Way” by the Raspberries.  Told you I’ve been on a late 60s / early 70s kick lately.

* “Innocent” by Our Lady Peace.  Wait, how the f*ck did my favorite song of all time NOT make it onto the Mixology list over the last few weeks?  This is an OUTRAGE!

* “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” by the Animals.  “Well I’m just a soul whose intentions are good – oh Lord, please don’t let me misunderstood!!!!”

* “Burn One Down” by Ben Harper.  Jesus Christ, did I REALLY forget to include ANY Ben Harper last time?  I did?!?!  Can I fire myself?  I can’t?  Damn.  (florida evans voice) damn, damn, damn!

* “Sexual Healing” by Ben Harper.  If I have to explain why this epic cover of an epic all-time classic is included on Mixology Part Cinco, there’s no hope for you.

* “Piano Man”, covered by Colton Dixon.  OK, blow up all you want, but – but! – I actually LOVE this cover.  And I’m the dude who typically HATES any covers of anything.  This guy (and in the interest of full disclosure, he was my pony / puppy / rooster / rubber chicken I backed on “Idol” last year) somehow took a completely depressing, down in the dumps song … and made it uplifting, positive, and inspirational.  Seriously.  When you can reinvent Billy Joel, you’ve done something right.

* “Drink In My Hand” by Eric Church.  Cannot believe this one slid through the cracks.  “All I wanna do is put a drink in my hand!”

* “Go Your Own Way” by Fleetwood Mac.  Because anytime a song works “packing up, shacking up’s all you wanna do!” into its lyrics, I can at least put it on the rotation list.

* “I Got My Mind Set On You” by George Harrison.  “Who’s George Harrison?”  Pay attention to the playlist, Champ.  Respect your elders, godd*mmit!

* “Sky High” by Jigsaw.  A great, forgotten classic from the mid 1970s.  “You’ve blown it all sky high / By telling me your lies / Without a reason why / You’ve blown it all sky high!” 

* “Work” by Jimmy Eat World.  “Can’t say I was never wrong / But some blame rests on you / Work and play, they’re never ok / To mix the way we do”. 

(captain obvious voice) wait, you say "pay attention to the playlist, champ ... and the next two songs, uum?  Yes, Captain Obvious.  I believe in subtle hints.

* “Somewhere Only We Know” by Keane.  I benched this one a few games ago … but clicking on it to reconsider its status … it’s back in the Mixology rotation.  I love this song too damned much.  I wish I had Blake Lewis’ version of it instead.  Hang on, searching iTunes … and nothing.  Damn.


* “Man In the Mirror” by Michael Jackson.  Hard to believe its been 3 ½ years.

* “Closer” by Ne-Yo.  Yes, I am the guy who, the first time he heard this song a few years ago, asked “what the hell is a Ne-Yo?”  Great cd.  Awesome song.

* “Guerrila Radio” by Rage Against the Machine.  Because I feel that every Chiefs fan has reached the Zack De La Roca breaking point: “F*ck it!  Cut the cord!”

* “Poem” by Taproot.  Whoa, Stevo chose a totally hard-core rocky song!  Good job Stevo!

* “F*ck Her Gently” by Tenacious D.  I know, I know – some people hate hearing the F bomb fly over the speakers … but come on.  This song is so f*cking awesome!

* “Out of My Head” by Theory of a Deadman.  Paired with …

* “All or Nothing” by Theory of a Deadman.  Mr. Hunt?  Mr. Pioli?  Mr. Baffoon?  Mr’s. Wrong 53?  Next Sunday? THIS SONG PERFECTLY DESCRIBES WHAT YOU HAD BETTER ACHIEVE ON THE FIELD!  “Looking at all or nothing – babe it’s you and I.  Looking at all or nothing – babe it’s you and I!!!”  Win next week … OR ELSE.  (Hint guys: I took the next TWO DAYS off work after the donkeys game.  I am prepared to “deal” with the impending debacle.  I’d prefer to not spend those two days in the Jackson County penal system.  Huh huh, he said “penal”.)

And finally, for the initial Mixology for Sunday …

* “Shambala” by Three Dog Night.  Actually, yeah, that’s on the Mixology list, and deservedly so, but the actual final initial run-through choice …

* “Where Everybody Knows Your Name” by Gary Portnoy.  It’s been a rough few months for me.  I’ve been in a b*tchfest over ridiculously stupid sh*t with one of my co-best friends (we’re both too arrogant to admit we were to co-blame for how ugly it got, sadly), and haven’t seen the other one nearly enough, over these last few months. 

So can we make a deal, please.  A compromise if you will, if only for my sanity, “Champ” … and “Voice of Reason”, although I got no issues with you – I will rig the iPod to have this song come on, when everyone has finally arrived on Sunday.  Can we please, everyone, agree – we’re gonna spend a solid 2 ½ minutes just enjoying the day!  As the perfect description of WHY we enjoy this, plays in the background!  We can even sing along and everything.  DEAL?  (Deal.)

Because even if you never loved “Cheers” as much as Gregg and I did … even Dusty has to know the chorus to this song.  Even my four year old nephew probably knows the damned chorus.

Because the chorus, is Tailgating 101, perfectly summed up in a television theme song:

“Sometimes you wanna go,
Where everybody knows your name!
And they’re ALWAYS glad you came!
You wanna be, where you can see,
Our troubles are all the same –
You WANNA BE where everybody knows your name!!!”

See y’all Sunday.  Not sure what the menu is yet, but we’re gonna have one eclectic group showing up.  My former boss and her husband, kids, and (I can’t wait to meet this dude) her daughter’s boyfriend.  My brother and his far better half, and our good friends Phil and Jenny.  DJ and Kellie.  The “Core 4”.  Anthony and Jaimmie and whoever else shows up.  I know we’ve been talking with Ray and his crew to combine together again like we did for oakland a couple weeks ago (and if he wants to organize another all out fish fry, like the playoff game two years ago?  NOBODY will complain!)

No matter what though – we’re about to enter my favorite week of the year.  Seriously.  The week when EVERYTHING gets put into perspective.  (And I write “the annual column”, my favorite post I, uuh, post, every year.)  I hope to see everyone reading this on Sunday.  We’ll be in our usual spot (grassy lot just north of G30.  Look for two red buses and a white bus, that’s us.)  And look for the hot-as-hell 35 year old in all black, that will be me.  Black this stadium out folks.  Black!  It!  Out!!!

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