Thursday, September 8, 2011

the week one prognostications

“Let go of our fear! Let go of our doubt!
Let go of the ones who try to put you down!
You’re gonna be fine! Don’t hold it inside!
If you hurt right now, then let it all out …

Breathe. Just breathe!
Take the world off your shoulders, put it on me.
Breathe. Just breathe!
Let the life that you live be all that you need …”

-- Ryan Star, “Breathe”. Come Sunday morning, don’t fail to remember those who can’t breathe anymore because of what those bastards did ten years ago …

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Last Week ATS: not applicable
Season to Date ATS: not applicable
Last Week SU: not applicable
Season to Date ATS: not applicable

Last Week’s Upset of the Week ATS: not applicable
Season to Date Upset of the Week ATS: not applicable
Last Week’s Upset of the Week SU: not applicable
Season to Date Upset of the Week SU: not applicable
This Week’s Upset of the Week: Vikings (+8 ½) over Chargers.

The Non-Chiefs, Non-Jets, Non-“That Game” Prognostications:

* Saints (+4) 34, at Packers 30.
* Vikings (+8 ½) 31, at Chargers 20.
* at 49ers (-5) 24, Seahawks 14.
* at Cardinals (-9) 44, Panthers 3.
* at Bucs (-1 ½) 31, Lions 13.
* at Bears (+2 ½) 24, Falcons 21.
* at Browns (-7) 34, Bengals 10.
* at Rams (+4) 27, Eagles 24.
* at Texans 27, Colts (+9) 23.
* at Redskins (+3) 20, Giants 19.
* at Ravens (-2) 21, Steelers 14.
* Titans (+2) 41, at Jaguars 16.
* Patriots (-7) 45, at Dolphins 30.

The “Root for Injuries and/or a Terrorist Attack” Bowl:

* at donkeys (-3) 24, raiders 20. It is not possible to put into words how much I hate the oakland raiders. And the English language has yet to come up with a word to describe my contempt for the denver f*cking broncos. What, you thought I’d make it a picks post without dropping a f bomb? Come on!

The Jets Prediction:

* Cowboys (+5) 31, at Jets 20. Got a really bad feeling about this one. I somehow envision my Sunday night ending with me chucking the Jets hat at the flat screen, with about 9 empty Coors bottles sitting in front of me, as I pass out on the couch in frustration at another inept Opening Day effort from Gang Green.

The Chiefs Prediction:

Normally, this is where I’d come up with some cute, quirky story to tie into this week’s game, or come up with some inspirational speech to get you in the mood to show up for said game … but not this week.

9/11 is extremely personal to me. My dad’s side of the family is from Long Island. My college roommate literally survived the attack – Vineet worked in the South Tower, and his boss had the common sense to say “no” to going back in when they evacuated after the north tower was hit. For me, this day is extremely personal.

Which is why I hate, I freaking HATE, that the NFL is playing on Sunday. The NFL should have pushed back Opening Week a day, and eliminated the bye week between the conference title games and the Super Bowl. It is CRIMINAL that we’re playing football, and exploiting the greatest national tragedy of most of our lifetimes, for profit. For pure, f*cking profit.

Then again, I’d expect nothing less from Roger Goodell and NFL ownership. These are the folks for whom every team turning a profit wasn’t good enough, hence the 132 day lockout.

If you’re coming out Sunday, you know where we’re at. (on the grass next to the G30 sign). Menu is buffalo wings and whatever else we come up with. Please, and of all people on this earth, I cannot believe I am typing this, but please, remember – this day is not about football. It should be about remembering nearly 3400 innocent people who were murdered by cowardly terrorists in an attempt to destroy what makes this nation the greatest in the history of civilization.

at Chiefs (-6) 33, Bills 6. Come on, like I’d pick any other score for a game involving Buffalo when I expect us to win …

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