Wednesday, January 29, 2020

the picture comes full circle, twenty years later ...

"How can I convince you?
What you see is real?
Who am I to blame you,
For doubting what you feel?

I was always reaching;
You were just a girl.
I knew I took for granted?
The friend I have in you.

I was living for a dream;
Loving for a moment.
Taking on the world?
That was just my style.

Now I look into your eyes?
And I can see forever!
The search is over!
You were with me all the while! ...

Can we last forever?
Or do we fall apart?
At times it's so confusing;
The questions of the heart.

You've followed me through changes,
And patiently you'd wait,
'Til I came to my senses,
Through a miracle of fate.

I was living for a dream!
Loving for a moment!
Taking on the world?
That was just my style!

Now I look into your eyes,
And I can see forever!
The search is over;
You were with me all the while! ..."

-- "The Search is Over" by Survivor.

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I will try not to cry while composing this, (allegedly) proofing this, and (eventually) posting this, uuh, post.

And I will fail to control my emotions.

So be it.

Because God knows I cried a lot -- and I mean a LOT -- last Sunday.

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From the Season Opening (Sorta) Recap from 2014:


(late 80s NBC announcer voice) And now, the final captured moment, from the 2019 season.

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"To (three four men) with more emotional endurance, than anyone I know.  It was a long, difficult road.  Thank God we finally got here!" -- Lily (Aldrin) Erikson, the series finale of "How I Met Your Mother".

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Twenty years ago, "The Voice of Reason", "Jasson", and myself, headed down for a leisurely stroll around Arrowhead, before beginning to tailgate the afternoon away.

It wasn't the first time this event had happened, and it certainly wouldn't be the last.  But it was a first in one regard: someone took the time to capture it, to create a mark history cannot ignore.

I remember this, because I was there -- a few hours before a late afternoon kickoff against your San Diego "Super" Chargers:


(Yes, it's a hazy picture, but in my defense, the original pic had a glass of shiraz spilled on it.  Gee, wonder who did that?  Left to right: myself, "Jasson", "The Voice of Reason", and Mr. Reason's mom (I believe).  Image credit: (I'm assuming) "The Voice of Reason's" sister, via a camera of some kind.)

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I have always loved that picture.  For reasons obvious to anyone; for reasons not so obvious but to a few.

I've always loved that clearly something I said to "Jasson" had him leaning back and laughing ... and clearly that something I said, had "The Voice of Reason" marching on with his head at his side in disgust ... and had his mom trailing us with a "I ain't getting into this" fallback maneuver.  (Note: smart thinking on her part.)

It's a picture of three great friends, who grew up together, survived many ups and downs, highs and lows, many a fight and drunken night * , captured in a moment of time, from twenty years ago.

I'm guessing a lot of you reading this, still have a clue who your best friends were twenty years ago, and even if you don't, the odds are, you're not as close to them as you were back then.

And to be fair, the same is true in my life.  If I was to list off my ten best friends from twenty years ago, maybe three or four of them are still a meaningful part of my life, and the other six or seven I hear from once or twice a year, either on their or my birthday, or via a "hey, I'm in town, wanna grab a beer before I head home" text or Facebook message.

Because life happens.  Families happen.  Successes beyond our wildest dreams happen!

(And sadly, f*ck ups and failures happen too.)

Such was life, twenty years ago.

Such is life, twenty years later.

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(*: yes, "the urban legend" is true: I did somehow, some way, leave my keys in Mr. Reason and Jasson's freezer, on New Year's Eve 1995 in lovely Naismith Hall.  To this day, I have no f*cking clue what I was thinking ... or what inspired one of us to look for my keys in said freezer, the following afternoon.  Then again, this was also the night Jasson decided to use the palm of his hand as a cigarette extinguisher, so I'm guessing none of us were exactly upright, ambulatory, and/or stone cold sober.  (Pause).  At least we were still a year or so away from taking El Presidente shots for Bip Roberts though!  (Please, don't ask.))

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I couldn't find any pictures from that walk in, until years later.  I know that if "Boy Meets World" taught me anything (and sadly, it probably taught me a lot), it taught me that "if you don't got pictures, then you got nothin'".  I am sure pictures exist.  Hell, they have to.  You can't go sixteen years without a single picture at a tailgate being snapped.  At least not in my group.

But in the sixteen year interval, what a run.  The Greatest Double Header Day Ever.  (Note: thank God pictures don't exist of that one ... I think.  Although the visual image of my uncle hauling out the tin cup never fails to make me laugh.)  The No-Punt Playoff Game against the Colts.  The "Rich and Rare" Experience in the Ravens Playoff GameRoadies all over the country.  The shifting of our tailgating spot from Lot N to Lot G.  (Long stor(ies).)  The additions of friends and family; the sad and tragic losses of friends and family.

Through it all, one thing remained the same.  That, is undeniable.

So, sorry Mr. Feeny, but you are wr ... wr ... wr ... possibly incorrect.  You don't need pictures to acknowledge something great happened.

The people who lived it?  Have the memories burned into their minds, forever.

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The build to this incredible, epic season truly began, I believe, through one of the worst, painful, "how the f*ck did this happen" defeats in franchise history.  And given that we're talking about the Chiefs here, that's saying something.

I'm just not sure which indefensible, unreal, "leaving the stadium swearing like a sailor" defeat it was -- January 16, 2017, or January 6, 2018.

Sunday, January 16, 2017, the Chiefs hosted Arrowhead's first (true) prime time playoff game, against the hated Pittsburgh Steelers.

Saturday, January 6, 2018, the Chiefs hosted Arrowhead's third (de facto) prime time playoff game.

Neither of them went well.

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From the tailgate before the first (true) prime time playoff game in Arrowhead's history:


(left to right: me, "The Voice of Reason", and whatever the hell we're calling Tim.  Image credit: I'm guessing Mona, via the old school Canon.)

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Unlike the game from the picture way above to start this post, the Chiefs lost, and in almost indefensible fashion.  They didn't allow a touchdown, they had the ball via a two point conversion with a shot to tie, and even after everything had unfolded for fifty eight minutes, all they had to do was stop Coach Asshat's third down and seven play to get the ball back, down two, at the two minute warning.

Sadly, it was not to be.  But just because you fall short of the ultimate goal, doesn't make you a failure in my book.  In fact, in an outright stunner to me, WWE style, I proclaimed the 2016 Chiefs my favorite Chiefs team of my lifetime, after that season was over.  I say "outright stunner", because I never thought anything other than a Super Bowl bound team, could top 1995.

As usual, I was wr ... wr ... wr ... probably incorrect.

Then, almost one year later, the Chiefs again sh*t the bed at home, blowing a 21-3 lead to fall 21-22 to the freaking Tennessee Titans.  Marcus Mariota threw a touchdown pass to himself.  Jeff Triplette -- who was justifiably fired by the NFL after his "officiating effort" in this game -- somehow ruled a sack as "forward progress".

I remember leaving both games disgusted as hell, and I'm guessing most of y'all reading this felt the same way.

And yet, sometimes, through tragedy, through defeat, through f*ck up and failure ... comes salvation.

After all, that's why we have this thing called "religion", right?

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Again, I'm not sure what defeat inspired this run more.

The Steelers defeat was enough to convince "Fat" Andy Reid, and the front office, and ownership, to do something the Chiefs hadn't done in thirty years: use a first round pick on a quarterback.

The Titans defeat was enough to convince "Fat" Andy Reid, and the front office, and ownership, to trade away "Sir" Alex Smith, and install that first round pick, at the helm of the franchise.

Had one or neither defeat occurred, would this team be where it is today?

There's a "what if" for the ages ...

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Because where we are -- or more specifically, where we were -- on Sunday, January 19, 2020, is something we Chiefs fans have never seen before.

And it was more than just fighting for our right, to party.

Mr. Reason, Jasson, and whatever the hell we're referring to Tim as, arrived a little before 9am on that blessed, sacred, "I'll never forget a damned thing about it" day.  And in the interest of fairness and honesty (only one of which I'm accused of being ... and it usually ain't honest), usually I'm the one who tries to snap the pics to capture the moment.  Because moments in a life should matter.  (Damned skippy.)  There are pictures hanging in the walls of my bedroom, my spare room, and my main room, that I simply have to look at, and start to (pick one) laugh / cry / smile.  I'm sure all of you have those memories up as well.

So when Tim handed his phone to Mona to snap a picture of us ... well, it's my favorite captured moment from 2019:


(left to right: Tim, Mr. Reason, myself, Jasson.  Image credit: Mona, via Tim's phone.)

This picture proudly hangs in my office at work, and is in my basket of sh*t from 2019 that needs a shelf or three to honor the season still.  (2016, 2017, and 2018 are properly honored in the Casa de Stevo.  Ditto some past seasons.  I refuse to honor 2019 until the season is over.  I think I'm right about this.)

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Twenty years.  Damned near half a lifetime for the four of us.

As Tim noted last Sunday: "did you ever think we'd all be here for this?  (Pause).  Well, I knew you three would be, but did you ever think we'd see this day together?"

To answer the question?  F*ck no.  No Chiefs fan ever imagined this day would dawn on us.

But here we are.

Gentlemen?  The search is over.

We f*cking did it!

And there are no three greater friends, I wanted to enjoy this day, forty three years in the making for most of us (forty two for Mr. Reason), with.

We f*cking did it.

That's my favorite captured moment of the 2019 Chiefs season.

98 some odd hours, until we hopefully top it ...

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