Wednesday, July 20, 2016

rnc night two: the night hillary won the presidency ...

“Another sleepless night I can’t explain.
Somebody said they heard me call you name.
The radio won’t let you leave my mind;
I know it’s over, but I don’t know why!

Should’ve known better!
Than to fall in love with you!
Now love?  Is just
A faded memory.

Should’ve known better!
Now I’m a prisoner to this pain!
And my heart?
Still aches?  For you …”


There was once a man named James Petigru.  A man famously known as “the only Unionist in South Carolina”.  As secession reached its apex in December of 1860, he truly was the only Unionist in South Carolina.  And yet, no matter how rabid secession fever became, Mr. Petigru was tolerated, was almost deified – held up as an example of how people viewed each other, even in the heart of a crisis.

On December 20, 1860, as the bells began ringing from St. Michael’s Cathedral, to announce that by a vote of 169-0, “the union that existed between the United States and South Carolina is hereby dissolved”, Mr. Petigru invited his dinner guests out onto the patio, but not to celebrate.

His comment was as accurate as it was simple.  “Would you care to join me gentlemen, to watch the South celebrate its’ own funeral”.

(His more famous quote being: "South Carolina is too small for a republic, and too small large for an insane asylum".  (Pause).  Yeah, both quotes fit last night perfectly.)

Yesterday – Tuesday, July 19, 2016 – the Republican Party committed suicide.  What’s amazing is that you would think the self-inflicted pill swallow choked down with a bottle of Jack that nominating Donald J. Trump “House of Wings” was?

Was NOT the cause of death.

The cause of death came almost five hours later.


“What the hell does any of this (we’re hearing tonight) have to do with the economy?  With jobs?  I thought this night was “Make America Work Again”?” – Gloria Borger, on CNN, approximate 8:50pm CT, last night.


I have some friends – some stronger than others – who think Donald J. Trump “House of Wings” is America’s salvation.

I got into it big time on Facebook last night with one of them, my buddy Vince.

And look it, I suppose I owe Vince an apology or three for how angry I was last night.  I try to not let my emotions of the moment overwhelm me.  I failed EPICALLY last night.

But?  In my defense?  I suspect that he, and Matt, and Lynn, and “Mr. Reason”, are just as furious at the last eight years of this nation’s history, as I am.  Mr. Obama is an utter and total failure.  He is a pathological liar.  He has failed to deliver on every single promise he made, not the least of which was to heal the racial divide that slavery stained upon this nation from day one.  I’d argue racial relations have rarely if ever been worse since Mr. Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation. 

And hell, few if any people are more disgusted and repulsed by this nation’s last sixteen years, than I am.  If you’re going to blame Mr. Obama as an epic failure, then what was his predecessor, other than “so utterly inept and incompetent that he made Mr. Obama acceptable to the public”?  If you truly are looking to dump the blame on someone for the economic hell this nation exists in, look no further than “Shrub”, as the late, great Molly Ivins so epically tagged W as.

But Vince, dude?  Mr. Reason, buddy?

Sixteen years of utter incompetence?  Deserves anger.  It deserves rage.  It deserves change.

It does NOT deserve more, of the same.

Or, if “House of Wings” wins?  Even worse.


“I’ve never been more embarrassed to be a Christian, than I am right now.  What a sellout!  What in God’s name was he thinking?  Trump?  That … man?  Is our salvation?  Are you kidding me?  God’s salvation for America isn’t a pathological liar who can’t even contemplate staying faithful to his wife!  God’s salvation for America isn’t a man who steals his employees into poverty!  God’s salvation for America cannot possibly … (me: you can tell she’s trying not to drop a bomb here) … it just … (finally reaching her breaking point) IT CANNOT POSSIBLY BE HIM!” – my mom, approximately 10:02pm CT last night.

“So, you’re voting for Hillary?” – me, in response, approximate 10:03pm CT last night.

“(Silence)” – my mom, in response, approximately 10:03pm CT last night.


This may come as a shock to some of you … but I respect the hell out of my mom.  She is a true Christian.  She doesn’t waver in her beliefs, no matter how much I try to convince her some of them might not be as true as she thinks.  (And to her credit, she tolerates my disbelief.  Twenty year old me is utterly stunned, at the tolerance that exists in both sides of our relationship.  Also, to her credit, she lives her faith.  It’s more than 92.46% of you reading this who claim to be Christians, can say.)

Folks?  Even my mom was repulsed by Dr. Carson last night.  And last time I checked, she threw away a couple thousand from my inheritance someday, to support Dr. Carson earlier this year.

Because … and to those of you reading this who are in your teens or twenties?  Let me share four words that not only were true last night?  They’ll be true every day of your life.

My mom is right.

What in God’s name WAS he thinking?

The “he” being Doctor Ben Carson.

Look it, either you loved or you hated Night Two of the Republican National Convention.  I was 100% wrong when I noted earlier Tuesday that “this was the throw-away night”.  No, last night was the DEFINING night of exactly who the party of “House of Wings” has become.

And I literally need to vomit.

Because if Donald J. Trump is God’s salvation for America?  As Dr. Carson claimed last night?

Then an eleven year veteran of the porn industry, gets screwed less, than this nation is about to be.


In five short minutes, Dr. Carson managed to murder the Republican Party.  It’s over folks.  There is no recovering from the utter and total devastation that Dr. Carson unleashed last night, a little after 9pm CT.

You can recover from plagiarism.  Ask Vice President Biden.

You cannot recover from shooting yourself in the head.

Which – contrary to his claims – is exactly what Dr. Carson did to half the political establishment last night.  He literally killed a political party last night, with the most disgraceful, embarrassing, indefensible speech I’ve ever heard in my life.

And given that we’re not even 36 hours past Pat Smith demanding Hillary Clinton be suited in prison stripes, given that we’re not even 36 hours past Pat Smith calling Hillary Clinton a murderer to the nation?  That’s saying something.

Somehow?  Dr. Carson sunk deeper into the sewer, than even Pat Smith did.

And in Pat Smith’s defense?  At least she had a valid excuse, to get sh*t all over herself, in that descent downward.


“The secular progressive agenda is antithetical to the principles of the founding of this nation.  If we continue to allow them to take God out of our lives, God will remove himself from us, we will not be blessed and our nation will go down the tubes, and we will be responsible for that.  We don’t want that to happen.

Now Donald Trump, he understands this fairly well, he understands that the blessings of this nation come with the responsibility to ensure that they are available to all, not just the privileged few.  This is exemplified by his willingness to take on the establishment against all odds.  It is evident in his passion for the American worker, it is found in his desire to put his considerable skills to work on behalf of American interests and not his self-interest.  I’m proud to support Donald Trump, an extraordinary businessman, the right leader for a time such as this.

But you know what?  It is not about Donald Trump.  It is not about me.  It is about we, the people, and Thomas Jefferson said that we would reach this point because we the people would not be paying attention and it would allow the government to grow, to expand, and to metastasize and to try to rule us.  But he said before we turn to something else, we the people would recognize what was going on, what we were about to lose, and we would rise up and we would take control of our nation and I say now is the time to rise up and take America back!”


Uuh, Doc?

The “secular progressive agenda” is the reason America exists – that a bunch of people said “f*ck it” to what the Church of England wanted, what the Catholic Church wanted, what ANY religion wanted, over three hundred years ago.

The “secular progressive agenda” decrees that beating your wife is wrong.  That beating your kids is wrong.  That education, reason, and intelligence elevates you in life, rather than your reliance on someone else to do it for you.

The “secular progressive agenda” demands science be heard.  You know that, “Doctor”.  You emphasized in the half of your speech that didn’t induce people who utilize their brains every day to vomit uncontrollably, you emphasized that God has given us intelligence, the ability to learn and adapt.  Do you propose we scrap every medical advance, every scientific discovery, and rely on a book written over 2,000 years ago as the sole source of knowledge for the human race?

The “secular progressive agenda” seeks peace, it seeks tolerance, it seeks acceptance for all.  Do you propose we revert to killing those we disagree with? 

The “secular progressive agenda” is what led Thomas Jefferson to write, in the greatest sentence a man has ever come up with on his own, that “we hold these truths to be self evident: that all men are created equal”. 

All men are created equal, Dr. Carson.  THAT?  Is what the “secular progressive agenda” has given the world: freedom.

You, sir, given the color of your skin, should recognize that far greater than I should.


Night Three sees Governor Pence accept the VP nod.

I’ll probably have to recap Night Three – today is my dad’s birthday, and due to unforeseen circumstances, I have to dogsit for my brother the next couple nights.  Since he’s about ten minutes from my folks, I’m taking my dad out to the bar tonight to celebrate.

God save us from ourselves.

Both America … and us …

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