steve's 2008 nfl predictions

Here you go. Laugh all you want. Just remember, I'm the guy who said the 2000 Giants were Super Bowl bound ... in August. And I'm the guy who said the 2006 Saints and 2006 Bears were meeting for the Super Bowl berth ... in August.

(sometimes, I rule.)

NFC East:

1. Dallas Cowboys 10-6. I think the Cowboys, on paper, are a better team this year than last year, when they went 13-3. The schedule is just that much tougher, with roadies at Cleveland and Pittsburgh, plus the divisional schedule, plus a roadie at Tampa and Green Bay and hosting Seattle. Asking a lot. They'll survive football's best division.

2. Philadelphia Eagles 8-8. I don't get the hype on the Eagles this year. This is essentially the exact same team that has gone 5-11, 10-6, 8-8 the last three seasons, missing the playoffs twice in that stretch. 8-8 seems about right.

3. New York Giants 8-8. Replacing both starting DEs is asking a lot. Doing it while playing in football's toughest division, with that schedule, is asking too much.

4. Washington Redskins 5-11. I'm not a fan of the Jim Zorn hiring. I'm not a fan of letting both coordinators go, especially when they're among the 3 or 4 best in the game. Someone in this division is going to get beat up by everyone else. I think it'll be the 'Skins.

NFC North:

1. Minnesota Vikings 10-6. I'm not a Tarvaris Jackson fan, but if AP is healthy, and as loaded as that defense is ... honestly, if the Chiefs look like this in two years, I'll be very, very happy.

2. Chicago Bears 7-9. Total crapshoot after Minnesota. I don't see any of the other three teams competing for a postseason berth.

3. Green Bay Packers 6-10. I think Rodgers will be decent. But I'm not sold on Ryan Grant, and as feel-good of a story as GB was last year, what put them in that spot? Incredible play at QB. You really think Rodgers can replicate Favre's MVP level performance this year?

4. Detroit Lions 2-14. Matt Millen clearly graduated from the Carlton Gray School of Have Incriminating Evidence on your Boss.

NFC South:

1. Tampa Bay Buccaneers 10-6. Any one of three teams can win this division. I think 3 teams from this division are going to the playoffs. I'm gonna take Tampa because they're the most solid top to bottom.

2. New Orleans Saints 9-7. Still not sold on the Saints D. Chiefs fans know you can't win with a dynamic offense and pathetic defense.

3. Carolina Panthers 9-7. If Delhomme plays all 16 games, they'd be my pick to win the division. I think he'll miss 3, probably all losses. They just sneak into the postseason.

4. Atlanta Falcons 0-16. This might be the worst team in the last 15 years in the NFL talent wise. And yes, if I pick 'em to go 0-16, it means I'm not picking the Chiefs to lose 25 consecutive games that count ... although I do think the streak will reach double digits ...

NFC West:

1. Seattle Seahawks 11-5. I think this team is way, way underrated. Still have a Pro Bowl QB, rock solid defense, great home field advantage, play in a crappy division that they can pad the win column with, and its Holmgren's final season. I like this team. A lot.

2. San Francisco 49ers 6-10. Probably the best of three awful franchises. Key word there being "probably".

3. Arizona "Super" Cardinals 5-11. Every year the pundits are like "yeah, the Cardinals, look out for them". They're the Arizona "Super" Cardinals. They've won one playoff game since World War II. Its not happening.

4. St. Louis Rams 3-13. When I redo the coaches rankings at some point, its a safe bet Scott Linehan is in the running for #32.

NFC Playoffs:

1. Seattle Seahawks
2. Minnesota Vikings
3. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
4. Dallas Cowboys
5. New Orleans Saints
6. Carolina Panthers

3 Bucs over 6 Panthers
4 Cowboys over 5 Saints

1 Seahawks over 4 Cowboys
3 Bucs over 2 Vikings

1 Seahawks over 3 Bucs

NFC Champion: Seattle Seahawks.

AFC East:

1. New England Patriots 12-4. Was last year's Super Bowl the football equivalent of the Diamondbacks / Yankees game 7? The Yankees have never recovered totally from Rivera's blown save in game 7, having failed to win it all since then, and only reaching the World Series once. Will the Pats come back fired up and motivated to atone? Or was last year their peak? This is still a very solid team, provide Brady is healthy, and should win the East.

2. Buffalo Bills 10-6. I like this Buffalo team, a lot actually. I think over the next three, four years, this is going to be a rising force. My last team into the playoffs in the AFC.

3. New York Jets 8-8. Yes, Favre is on board. Yes, the Jets are better because of the (literally) hundreds of millions of dollars. But asking a team to go from 4-12 to 10, 11 wins (because I think it will take at least 10 to get in in the AFC) is asking an awful lot. The Jets have done it before, as recently as two years ago in fact, going from 4-12 to playoff team. But the AFC's not as weak this year as it was in 2006.

4. Miami Dolphins 3-13. As much as I love Chad Pennington ... not even he can save this team.

AFC North:

1. Pittsburgh Steelers 9-7. I really, really, really wanted to swallow the Cleveland Browns Kool-Aid. Those folks deserve a winner. But I can't. Too much, too soon. And the coach ... and with a brutal, brutal schedule ... the proven, veteran team survives. Barely. Steelers by a game ... over ...

2. Cincinnati Bengals 8-8. Bengals strike me like the 2002 Chiefs. Great offense, loaded at pretty much any position. But couldn't stop a cripple (peter griffin voice) in a wheelchair for 45 minutes ... from scoring on them. The '02 Chiefs went .500. Sounds about right for the '08 Bengals.

3. Baltimore Ravens 7-9. Definite sleeper potential. I think Kyle Boller is better than folks give him credit for being. I think Joe Flacco will be this draft's 2nd best QB when its all said and done, after Chad Henne. But still at least a year away from winning this division. Emphasis on "at least".

4. Cleveland Browns 6-10. As much as I wanted to pick Cleveland with the heart ... Romeo Crennel is simply incapable of pulling this off. Bad coaches will always be bad coaches. And Romeo Crennel is a definite front runner for "Number 32" in the "Steve Rates NFL Coaches-o-Meter" due out any day now ...

And now ... for the "yup, Steve drank some "Kool Aid" portion of the predictions ..."

AFC South:

1. Jacksonville Jaguars 13-3. I love this team. I cannot convey in words ... how much I love the makeup of this team. This is your Kansas City Chiefs for pretty much the entire decade of the 90s. "Small revenue" team, super stud defense, decent offense, a QB away from being considered the favorite. This is the year they break through.

2. Houston Texans 12-4. Another team that I love the makeup of. I fully expect to get ripped over this. I don't care. This is a rising force in the AFC. Teams like this tend to arrive a year before anyone thinks they should (like your 1990 Chiefs). I love the roster Rick Smith and gary kubiak have put together. Definite dark horse sleeper in the AFC. Which means, if this team is 12-4, and I have Buffalo as the last team in at 10-6, that means ...

3. Indianpolis Colts 9-7. I don't think Manning is healthy. Not even close. That, and you simply cannot expect a team that's won 12 or more games 6 years in a row to keep it going. As mid 90s Chiefs fans know ... it all comes crashing down eventually. This is the year "eventually" visits Indy.

4. Tennessee Titans 8-8. Last year was the aberration. This year is the reality: good enough to be competitive, not good enough to break through.

AFC West:

1. San Diego "Super" Chargers 16-0. Yup, for the first time ever, I project a team to go unbeaten. Its not gonna help them come January ... but for four months, they will establish themselves as the unquestioned kings of the league.

2. Kansas City Chiefs 10-6. I think the season will boil down to the Buffalo home game. I think we will lose it. Hence, we finish out of the postseason on tiebreakers. And yes, I have been drinking as I made these predictions ...

3. oakland raiders 9-7. raiders should be decent this year. Too bad for them that means al davis fires lane kiffin for actually doing a decent job.

4. denver "effing" broncos 7-9. "the supreme leader"'s final season. And yes, if he comes to Arrowhead (or whatever it is renamed as) next year as our head coach, I will be a very, very happy camper ...

AFC Playoffs:

1. San Diego Chargers
2. Jacksonville Jaguars
3. New England Patriots
4. Pittsburgh Steelers
5. Houston Texans
6. Buffalo Bills

3 Patriots over 6 Bills
5 Texans over 4 Steelers

1 Chargers over 5 Texans
2 Jaguars over 3 Patriots

2 Jaguars over 1 Chargers

Super Bowl whatever the hell number we're up to:

Jaguars 26, Seahawks 20.

Predicted Chiefs outcomes:

at Patriots 27, Chiefs 16.
at Chiefs 16, raiders 3.
Chiefs 21, at Falcons 0.
at Chiefs 17, broncos 13.
at Panthers 17, Chiefs 16.
bye
at Chiefs 27, Titans 13.
Chiefs 25, at Jets 22.
at Chiefs 27, Bucs 20.
at Chargers 45, Chiefs 10.
at Chiefs 22, Saints 16.
Bills 24, at Chiefs 20.
Chiefs 41, at raiders 37.
at broncos 27, Chiefs 3.
Chargers 24, at Chiefs 21 (OT)
at Chiefs 34, Dolphins 20.
Chiefs 30, at Bengals 20.

(no postseason due to Bills having tiebreaker via head to head victory).

Here's to another great season! (steve raising glass) And to New Orleans by and large being spared another devastating destruction ... if only because God himself only knows how Renny would have reacted to the French Quarter under water ...