Thursday, September 4, 2008

the rnc: night four ... live blog

Yup, I'll be at it tonight. Plan to start around 6ish and go for a while, although I probably won't cover McCain's speech, I'll watch that live and then recap it later. Hope you join in, I'll be logged into Yahoo! IM as well at teamtito15 if you want to interact.

5:40pm: and we're underway. Starting on OMSNBC, a riveting debate between the director of an anti-abortion organization and the NOW President. The NOW President is lying through her teeth about Governor Palin, and David Gregory just called her on it and put up the proof. I don't know what's more surprising: the fact that the President of NOW is lying on TV thinking she can get away with it ... or that OMSNBC actually pointed out the lie.

(I'm going with the latter).

Speaking of OMSNBC, a great look at the coward of all cowards, Keith Olbermann, who apparently is scared of Republican delegates to the degree that he refused to go to St Paul. (tmq voice) brawk brawk!

Sorry, the link: http://www.unclebarky.com/reviews_files/b00278f9a0b29815d6641596a7f1cdcf-490.html

Supposed to get underway shortly, so I'm heading up to CSPAN, the last bastion of unbiased coverage in this nation. (Because they have no commentators).

7 minutes until we're live. Trace Atkins doing the Anthem tonight, I heard it during his walk through today while listening to OMSNBC at work, and it's gonna be good.

Major speakers tonight: former Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty, (gag me) Senator Sam Brownback, Cindy McCain, and of course, the nominee himself.

Yes! the balloons are set to go! 100,000 falling after the speech! Plus 200 lbs of confetti! Its not quite as magical as hearing Gomer Pyle sing about "the moonlight on the Wabash" as the balloons fly at Indy, but hey, you take what you can get.

CSPAN going nowhere fast, up to CNN.

Whoops they're previewing McCain's speech. Like last night, I don't want to hear anything about it beforehand. I entered this week an undecided, determined not to decide until I'd heard from both sides. Night one, the Dems won. (Of course there was no Rep night one). Night two I thought was a draw, both Hillary (who should have been our nominee, got the most votes, and won every damned key state we need in November, stupid DNC ...) and Fred Thompson were great. Night three I give to the Republicans. I loved Biden's speech ... but man, how do you top Palin last night? How? That might have been the single best speech I've ever sat and listened to. And I am not a conservative Republican, but my Lord. Unreal.

Let's see what Johnny can do tonight, because Barry was solid on Night Four last week. Not great, but solid.

(And as usual, completely vague about what exactly he'll do if he wins).

Hope we see some substance tonight.

One clear area the Dems kicked ass at though was the house band. I haven't heard Earth, Wind and Fire yet. Hell, I haven't heard much of anything yet out of these tools in St. Paul.

Back on CSPAN, overhead shot of the delegates. Second clear advantage the Dems have: our delegates get into this. They dress up like its Halloween, they dance, they have fun. Republicans are just sitting around doing nothing. Sad, really. Do you know what I'd give to be a delegate at one of these things? To be a part of making history this year? Because no matter who wins, for the first time, we'll either have a non-white male President, or non-white male VP. Kind of cool.

Oh, apparently Lindsay Graham speaks tonight too. As one of the traitorous gang of 14 that got Alito confirmed, boo!

"Patrick Clayton!" I'm still hacked over my performance last night. Utterly inexcusable. Utterly inexcusable.

And I still contend there is no way in hell that "Every Breath You Take" is the most played song of all time. The only way that's even remotely believable is if you combine the original with P Diddy's sampling of it. And even then, there's no way it beats "Unchained Melody" or "Imagine", no freakin' way.

blogspot.com's having issues, so bear with me. Its taking its sweet time to post.

PA playing "I Won't Back Down" by Tom Petty. Its not often I like a remake better than an original ... but Johnny Cash's version of this is just incredible.

Here we go! The RNC Chairman Mike Duncan to open night four. The final Convention night until I'll be 35 ... and still probably single, male, straight, on a ridiculously long "scoring slump", and blogging away in a computer room in south KC while getting hammered on Coors Light.

(Although hopefully I'll have a covered deck back by then to enjoy this outside).

8 Olympians to lead the Pledge. I didn't catch who makes up the color guard.

Ryan somebody, Mitch Gaylord, Brittany Hayes (hello!), Barbara Higgins (ugh), Larsen Jensen, El Logan (yikes), Marcus I'm-not-gonna-even-try-to-spell-it, and John somebody.

Once again, "under God" is not part of the original pledge. And they emphasize it. I love conservatives trying to hijack our wonderful modern day liberal society and take us back to the 1600s.

Trace Adkins! (george takei voice) oh my. He is tall. And he is good.

We're already almost 10 minutes behind schedule. Could be another long night. It was almost 1am before I went to bed last night after watching and reacting to the Governor's speech ...

Solid effort by Mr. Adkins. And I like the cowboy hat. Its not quite as sweet as Memphis' fedora on Big Brother.

Oh no, Archbishop Demetrius. I believe this is the same scary looking guy who led the invocation on Day 3 of the DNC.

Holy sh*t it is.

I'm telling you, when this guy flies, he gets extra screening. Although his crappy English sounds better tonight than it did last Wednesday.

Then again, I'm happier tonight than I was last Wednesday, known as "Titanic Day" to me, the day the Democratic Party hit the damned iceberg by nominating Barry ...

Good Lord, we're at the 3 minute mark on the prayer.

Apparently D and Mallory hit it off again last night. Good for them! Here's hoping his "scoreless streak" never reaches Steve like levels ...

Uuh, when Dingy Harry Reid declared the Iraq war "lost", it was "lost" at the time. Come on.

Tom Cole. Liar. Conservative. A Rep from Oklahoma.

Whoa, Congress' approval is at 9%?!?! How's it that high?

Old vet trying to work a digital camera. Sadly, he's probably better at it than I am.

That was short and not so sweet of a speech. (system of a down) lies from the tablecloth.

Some dude running for Congress at the podium now. He's trying too hard.

Republican reformers?!?! Hang on, I almost spit up the Coors Light. What reform? Take us back to the 1940s? Demolish every meaningful social advance made in the last 40 years? Good God, I'm flipping back to Barry. Somebody better talk me off the edge.

Buddy, you've OWNED the government for this entire freaking decade!!! If you don't like the America you see, grab a baseball bat and beat yourself over the head, you freaking created it!!!

Agh! I am so effing sick and tired of these pissy ass Republicans blaming Democrats for all our problems. WE aren't the ones who haven't passed a meaningful energy bill in 8 years. Or presented one. WE aren't the ones who haven't passed one damned border security bill in 8 years, despite 9/11 occuring in that time. WE aren't the ones ... oh what's the point.

This current guy trying to get a "No We Won't" chant going over Nancy Pelosi's "extremely liberal agenda". He's failing miserably.

(I think I've calmed down ...)

Another Congressional candidate. Enjoy the landslide losses this fall guys. (Hopefully).

I can sign off on backing McCain / Palin because I can't stand Obama. But I'll be damned if I'm voting to give full control of the government back to the Republicans.

Side note: apparently Palin's amazing speech last night so frightened Barry ... that he's on O'Reilly tonight. I will therefore be flipping to FOX News come 7pm to see what he has to say.

A 27 year old Republican running from Congress from Peoria Illinois. Good luck with that. Just wait until the Grigsby attack machine gets turned loose on him ...

Aaron Schock is his name. "A leg up, not a hand out". Good line.

Camera just focused on a row of sleeping delegates. Sounds like a good time to have some food. I'll be back in a little bit.

6:27pm: and I'm back. Sen. Ensign just accused the Dems of "not being willing to stand up to true evil in the world". Sadly ... with Barry at the top, its a legitimate claim.

I love these RNC videos. Probably because Robert Duvall is the host of all of them. Viva Tom Hagen!

Apparently the Palin video that didn't air last night, airs before Cindy McCain goes on at 8:30. I'm curious to see it.

The floor starting to fill in.

They lengthened the stage tonight to put McCain in the middle of the delegates. Smart thinking if you ask me. And if someone's thinkin', they're probably drinkin'.

Sen. McConnell to officially nominate Governor Palin. Like I kept asking during Biden's speech last week ... is it too late to flip the ticket?

28 minutes until the biggest moment of Barry's political career. This interview with O'Reilly is either going to stop the bleeding, or McCain's leaving this with a 10-12 point bounce and never looking back.

(I'm betting on the latter).

Whoa, some delegate just looked like he was hitting a flask! As someone armed with multiple bottles for KU home games and multiple flasks for Chiefs home games, hooray!

Phone's going off, gotta take it. I'll be back by 7.

7:14pm: or 7:14. Sorry bout that.

Obama interview begins here shortly, so I've flipped up to FOX News.

Commercial on FOX. Former Speaker (and utter hypocrite) Gingrich up next. Yup, its CSPAN time again.

The first 3 star female General speaking now. It appears McCain is doing the same thing Kerry did in 2004 and taking Night Four ultra military.

This chick is scary looking.

Back to FOX News. To Gingrich's credit, he unloaded on an OMSNBC reporter today.

CBS News poll shows a tie. Which means last night's bump was 6 points. I said earlier today the bump would be 10 and McCain would never look back.

Then again, I've been predicting a "45 States and the District" landslide for McCain every since Hillary "suspended her campaign" in early June. Titanic, meet iceberg. Democrats, meet unelectable moron.

Wow, FOX just showed clips from McCain / Palin here in Missouri last week ... and there are MULTIPLE Hillary 08 signs in the crowd. (steve chanting along with them) PUMA! PUMA! PUMA!

Looks like 16-7 at the half, Giants leading. On pace to beat the 9pm RNC kickoff.

McCain scheduled to go on at 9:11pm by the way, so an 11 minute buffer for ONBC.

(You know ONBC News is praying for overtime ...)

O'Reilly highlighting Megyn Kelly going off on US Weekly's editor. What a deuche. The editor I mean.

Seriously, who gives a crap if her daughter is pregnant? At the risk of offending people here ... who cares? She's 17. Its her life. And who the hell are we to judge her decision here? I know I sure as all hell didn't want to be a parent at 19, and I'm still not ready at 31. Its her life. Leave her alone.

(That, and the backlash from this, I'm telling you, is going to get ugly. If Barry is smart, he'll pull the plug on this. Of course, its Barry. He hasn't done anything smart in six months. Its why he's going to get creamed in 61 days).

Obama interview up next. Tonight focuses on national security. Tomorrow I assume is domestic issues. Same format as with Hillary.

This is like the 5th health care needs to be agenda item number one ad already tonight. I'd say energy needs to be issue number one, closely followed by securing, uuh, some form of secure situation in the Middle East, but hey, noone ever accused me of thinking clearly.

And here we go. O'Reilly. Obama. (mills lane) let's get it on!

Parts 2, 3, 4 next week. Calls them "provocative".

I think he's handled the Iran question quite well. O'Reilly trying to bait him, but I agree with Barry here, "when you're one of two people seeking the Presidency of the United States, you don't tip your hand until you're one person left standing".

Admits the "surge has succeeded in ways nobody could have anticipated". Uuh, I think the guy speaking at 9:11pm tonight anticipated it ...

Again, Obama's not saying anything I don't agree with. Initial invasion: horribly managed. Surge: worked tremendously. Credit: Petraeus. Bottom line: surge still doesn't justify the beginning of this debacle ... yet.

He's struggling with the Pakistan question.

Obama's getting fired up.

And that's it for part one.

I'll say this: if I vote Obama, it ain't for foreign policy reasons. But I already knew that entering this deal tonight.

Joe Gibbs at the podium.

Comparing God to the head coach of a football team. (george takei voice) oh my.

This is a freaking sermon. At the podium. Of a political convention. I don't know whether I'm more in shock and awe at this blatant whiz on the separation of church and state.

Or if I'm more in respect and admiration at this blatant whiz on the separation of church and state.

"Right game plan leads to what? (has to look at the notes). Success!" Thanks Joe!

Are we about to get an alter call?

Another sleeping delegate. Or me if I was there.

Seriously, this speech was bad. I'm not trying to come off as anti-religion, but this was just a bad speech.

And we follow it up with "Centerfield". Probably a better choice than "F*ck You Gently" by Tenacious D.

"Empty Nest!"

Man, how did we lose last night. Oh that's right, I totally botched the 150 pt question at the end. And I'm the American Idol addict in the group.

(steve reaching for hhh's sledgehammer to administer some justice ...)

GI John and Superwoman posters everywhere. I like it. Not as good as the old "African Americans for Gore / Lieberman" placard back in the day, but hey, again, you take what you can get.

Whoa, this delegate is holding up about 6 ft wide American flag ... and he's almost as wide as the flag. Have we confirmed Mark Mangino is not a delegate?

"Dangerzone" up next. Apparently crappy mid 80s rock is back in with our conservative friends.

On the other hand, the song is from "Top Gun". And McCain is the "Maverick" of this election.

(Although I doubt he'll get it with Kelly McGillis. Seriously, I think I burned through that tape in like 2 weeks, the first rated R movie I ever remember seeing ... and I don't think it left the hookup scene for like the first 550 times I watched it. Sometimes I wish I was 10 again ...)

Yes! An elephant hat! A gator hat! The Texans tossing sombrero-sized cowboy hats! Finally, somebody found the open bar at this thing!

Awesome, awesome "terrible towels" in the Pennsylvania delegation. Bright yellow, they say "Pennsylvanians for McCain! We're not bitter!"

Lindsay Graham up next. Can't believe he's being applauded, given how much the conservative base hates him.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this speech is for the troops!" Wow, he is going full on Kerry tonight and channeling his inner veteran. Just so long as we don't get a cheezy video of him heading up the Mississippi River in a Swift Boat ...

Graham declaring victory in Iraq. Yeah, that worked out well the first time around.

Cheap shot at moveon.org. I'm good with it. They're nuts. Them, and the Daily Kooks. I mean, Daily Kos.

Like Lindsay Graham knows one damned thing about "courageous leadership", Gang of 14 gutless bastard.

"They (the troops) said Senator McCain, this (current situation in Iraq) ain't workin ..." WHAT? I thought we accomplished the mission 1,968 days ago? You're saying Bush lied? No ...

"Calling for more troops to be sent to Iraq was one of the most unpopular things John McCain could have done". Not Impeaching our incompetent Commander in Chief for lying about winning the war is far less popular with me.

If I was to type what I thought of Lindsay's last 4 paragraphs of speech, I would probably be arrested for slander.

Uuh, Barack just acknowledged their success on O'Reilly you jackass.

I am not a Lindsay Graham fan. Pardon me, Lindsey. Lindsey Graham.

He can't pronounce "miserably".

"Miserably" is how I'm feeling watching this lying baffoon.

What? Graham just said "we're going to win this war". 5 minutes ago he said we "had won this war -- victory!" Good Lord, at least Bush consistently lied about Mission Accomplished. This guy can't last 5 minutes!

(Neither could I at this point. Ka boom boom ching).

Palin video bumped from last night up next. I'd have chosen someone less, uuh, annoying to introduce it.

Then again, they did, since Guiliani was supposed to intro this last night.

I am digging this video. Right down to the pilfered "Dallas" theme song sound alike playing in the background.

(The lesson, as always: TV theme songs rule).

Officially one hour exactly from McCain. Unofficially about 19 minutes from the end of this, I'm done when Cindy takes the stage. I think.

'Skins / Giants well on pace to end by 10pmET. You can hear the ONBC and OMSNBC staffers cursing from here.

Great video. Tremendous.

Tom Ridge up next. Just like I'm among the few pro-life Dems ... he's among the few pro-choice Reps. Diversity. Again, practiced everywhere in the Republican Party, unless you're gay. Then you have cooties and need to go away.

This guy looks like Fred Willard. But he's not nearly as funny.

"Its not about who can answer a 3am call, its about who has answered the call his entire life". Solid line.

"Its not about building a record, its about having one". Great line.

"Its not about talking pretty, its about talking straight!" Its about the Dems nominating a freaking retard with nothing positive to offer this country, pal. I'm telling you, we will regret the Obama nomination like nothing this party has ever done.

"We are all called to serve as long as we call ourselves free". Good line.

"That's John McCain!"

Wow, this guy looks like Fred Willard.

Cindy McCain intro video.

If this is possible, Cindy's hotter now than she was 30 years ago.

Hu-Yuge applause for the McCain pic.

Wow, McCain looked a lot like Fred Couples back then.

Memories of Cindy's dad. She forgot "and rich".

Ooh, she's a racing fan! And she built cars! Kick ass! She owns a mother / son racing team! My Lord, I think my mind is almost made up ...

And here's ... Cindy!

Introducting the family.

There's no way she cranked all of them out. No way. I know one's adopted, but if the other six are hers ... and Palin has five ... my Lord, I might have to remove the "no kids" requirement from the future "Mrs. Steve". Or "Steve's Friend with Benefits".

(or whatever I can find on adult friend finder, which I'd be scared to think about).

Since I was just asked, the "O" in "OMSNBC" and "ONBC" is for "Obama". Those networks are so in the tank for Barry, they no longer should be referred to by their actual network names.

(So does that mean it should be MFOX News?)

I forgot to throw this out there: guess what Cindy's rockin' tonight! If you said massive pearl necklace, you're a winner!!!

My Lord, she's a MILF.

"I've always thought its a good idea to have a woman's hand on the wheel as well". Aah ... screw it, let it go.

"So how about that Governor Sarah Palin". Hu-yuge ovation for Sarah. And my God is she on fire tonight. Beautiful gray jacket, black skirt ... but no pearls. (aw).

The floor is just loving her.

"I couldn't be prouder that John has shaken things up ... as he usually does." I love double entendres ...

"Its why I love that John will have Sarah by his side ..."

Her son Jack graduates from the Naval Academy next year. Her son Jimmy an Iraq vet. Explains the Navy and USMC pins.

So if she's 13 years younger than him ... she's 59 or 60 depending on when her birthday is. (peter griffin voice) Holy crap!

again ... she's 59 or 60.

And she saved two orphans from Mother Teresa's village in India.

Wonder Woman! Speaking of TV theme songs I should have channeled for the Week One picks ...

She just accurately pronounced 5 countries. Which beats Bush's personal record of three.

(I kid, I kid. Although I wonder, are the Dems gonna do the same thing as Bush did in 2000, and work all these foreign leaders and countries into his debate responses to make him seem up to speed on foreign affairs when he's not got a clue? Yeah, let that sink in fellow donkeys. We nominated a man dumber and less qualified for this job than the current occupant of it. Excuse me while I bash my head into the desk ...)

Some chick that is Cindy McCain's hero.

Good point, that McCain lead the way to restore relations with Vietnam. Nixonesque with China, if you ask me. Except Nixon was never tortured by the ChiComs.

Tuesday night's printout was 19 pages. I've gotta be pushing that mark right now.

Building up to him ... but the schedule says 9:11 for McCain to start. Building in 5 minutes for the applause, maybe 5-6 for a video, we're ahead of schedule?

1:38 to go in the Meadowlands. Giants up 9 with the ball. ONBC, OMSNBC, sorry fellas, no excuse to not cover this live ...

And she's out. Crowd leaps to its feet. Nowhere near as energized as when Rudy yielded the stage to Governor Palin last night ... but then again, far more energized than any moment at the DNC save for the Kennedy tribute. Because at least the Republicans nominated a credible candidate. Our credible candidate is in the Veep slot. And sitting at home in Chappaqua, NY ...

Wow, CSPAN's building in 1:10 for this speech. Figuring 10 minutes for confetti, balloons, and fun, that's an hour of talking. I hope he does well ... but stuff like this is NOT McCain's strength. He'd be better off keeping this in the 40 minute range and praying the teleprompter dude is smarter than the one operating it last night.

More crazy Texans.

Hey, finally some delegates dancing. Only took 4 days.

Drunk Abe Lincoln looking fellow.

Hey! "Celebration" by Kool and the Gang! FINALLY some freaking dance your ass off music! Again, what took so long! The DNC had this going before night one even convened!

I'm guessing Will's in a foul mood. The Jim Zorn era? Not off to a good start. Or a competent one. Or hopeful. Awful performance by his offense tonight. 16-7 defending champs barring a 68 yard final play toss.

More crazy Texans! I actually own that shirt somewhere, the Texas flag shirt. Oh yeah.

Maybe I should try to find that and wear it when I get the "group of mo fo'ing idiots" to sign the masturbation gloves picture at the home opener.

And yes, I might have been feeling good, and I might have forgotten some key things like "who is Kristy Lee Cook" last night ... but a promise is a promise. I'll ask the gang of mo fo idiots to sign their moment of infamy next Sunday ...

(Its not like I've ever been decked by an irate fan at a football game before. Oh wait, I have ...)

"Drill Baby Drill!" sign. Oh, I'd like to ... for oil, of course ...

The lights dim. The McCain intro video begins.

With that, I'm out. I'll recap McCain's speech by lunch tomorrow.

They're playing the same Dallas rip-off theme song in this video that they did in Palin's. And I'm good with it.

Until the next post, remember: Kristy Lee Cook performed "Faithfully" on the 2008 Idol season. Carrie Underwood did not perform "Faithfully" in the 2005 season. An item I will never forget after last night ...

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